X-Sabre

Hmm, overall, I believe this is uplifting. It's simple structure, and I always love shortening words to make them fit. And "the heart of worship" Is that one of those songs I always see on that Christian Rock album thingie all the time? I can't think of what they call the compilation, but for some reason, I think I saw that title on that commercial.. not sure though.

Very nice Loki. Odd structure, but it all flows well. And I love the idea of escaping into the recesses of your mind, it's probably what most people use drugs for.. myself included. I suggest you go listen to Phish - Brian and Robert.. It's kind of like this, but in a sense, very different.

Overall, an uplifting poem. A bit too positive for my outlook, but nonethe less a decent work. Simple structure, easy flowing rythym, it all works well together. Just one little thing I could suggest. In this line, I'm wondering if it might sound better to be in a plastic rose with such artificial looks. Other than that, nothing really seemed to mess up my rythym a bit, so good job.

You are a wierd guy there buddy. The poems, short, simple, to the point. I like the rhyming of course, it flows quite well. Although the last one you wrote scares me a bit, there's a lot of anger contained within that, and I'm not sure what to think of it.. But, as you said, it's more for the healing qualities of putting things on paper, so no need to understand it. Here's to you bud, and hey, those voices. It's me.. and the purring, I placed a small transmitter right behind your ear, so you hear that recorded purring sound

ntraveler, I've got this to say. Who really cares? It's just a silly rank in a silly place. Try to get more involved with the community, and you might see a promotion soon. Or you can just pretend to be a little version of me, and even get me annoyed, either way it's your choice. I'm not going to stop you, and I'm not going to condemn you, cuz well, unlike some others, I don't care about any of this. I just use this as a place to write down some ideas, and then I finish working on them later. Away from the eyes of elitest mentalities, and overly smug people.

hmm, 10 to midnight on fridays.. Oooh, if I'm home I'll listen, but little chance of that.. heh

Tralla, I'm in to help in whatever way I can. Scripting and stuff hmm.. Shouldn't be too awfully hard.. I'll try writing up something here soon. And as for the story.. I'd be willing to contribute some ideas if you need them, god knows there are plenty of them.

I know what you did Loki.. Not a bad poem, and I always love starting the next line, with the word that ends the last line. That's a really fun way to do it, and most don't really notice it. Nice job on it btw. Try a bit harder, I'll see if I can find your "hidden messages" *note to self, quit giving Loki those damn shrooms*

Snow is bad.. Therefore, snowball fights are bad. Down with winter!

About time Orlan.. You've been mentioning it for a while now

That's right, make yourself cozy Zen. I won't harass ya too much. *goes to shackle himself to the bed again*

Congrats Salinye! Finally, I have some peace.. No wonder it seemed so calm recently! Best of luck with the move, god knows I hate doing it. And we'll wait, just maybe not patiently

Nice, wish I understood more about verse and such to really critique it.. But, maybe I'll learn something once in a while.. Who knows, it's possible!

Embuing might work, or perhaps strengthening, but seems a bit too jagged there.. I'd say embuing would be great, but it would add an extra syllable to your next line, which would throw off the 7-6-6-5 thing you had going.. Not sure if it was intended, but eh, thought I'd say it.

Yeah, what they said.

Life advice? Just keep going. That's it. Don't look down and don't look back. Just keep going. Or, you can just not think about it too deeply, and live blindlessly like a lot of people. I don't really think I should be giving advice.. In fact, I don't think I should ever answer a question similar to this again. *hides from the boards for at least a week or 2 to let people forget*

Risk taking, to enjoy happiness. Shape shifting, to change into whatever. Light bending, to hide in the darkness. Plan making, to prepare the endeavor. Keep trying to become what you aren't. Trying to hide among the real. Lying to people like without a heart. Dying to be like what they feel.

Just a minor spelling correction, breath should be breathe. Other than that, nice poem. Short, sweet, to the point. Even though I personally don't like the love poem genre, this is an overall good work.

Argh, I thought I knew that song! Don't mind me, I'm gonna go kick myself a few times for not answering it earlier. *feels ashamed to own every Bob Dylan album now*

I really wish I had more to comment on this subject, but to agree with Wyvern, rhyming does feel cliche'd at times. A lot of the lines I want to use always feel like they've been overdone. I'm also thinking the amount of free flow also corrilates(sp?) to the experience of poets. At least speaking for myself, I know that when I first started to write, there was a lot less structure to my works. But the more and more I wrote, and the better I *hopefully* got, the more structure my poems seemed to find. But then again, a big part of that is from the advice, critique, and support of people in the Pen. So, just my 2 cents..

Hahaha, love'em both. Anyone think my pinky will quit being numb by Christmas? Maybe Santa will bring a miracle? er, if only I knew why it was numb.. Bad pinky bad.

X-Sabre looks up and waves at ya. Hiya and wb.

Nice poem Gwai.. I liked it, wish I could erm, criticize better, but I just like it..

BBE!!!!!!! BBE!!!!!! Yo.. welcome back fella.

Yeah, I wanted to do it longer, but I was just like.. uhhh..I'm lost. so.. there ya go.