YUI-CHAN!!!

[Orlan]

Orlan stretched as he walked into his room, high in the towers of the Pen. It had been a while since he had the opportunity to take a moment to himself the past....well lets just say it's been a while. As Orlan walked in he noticed that his room reflected this ....while. Piles upon piles of papers filled his room. They were all over his sturdy, Tzimfemme-tested-Orlan-approved, oak desk, spread out and in piles over his once new Tzimfemme-tested-Orlan-approved loveseat set from JCPenny's (on sale, good deal) and even piled into his Tzimfemme-Chocolate-tested-Orlan-Dark-Chocolate-Approved oversized Martini Glass/Hot Tub.

 

Orlan gave a sigh. So much paperwork, so little time to deal with all the flippin' paperwork. Unfortuntely for Orlan, the laws of physics were against him, for his sigh caused a butterly in Uganda to flap it's wings which caused....well, you know the old standard. In a sudden gust the winds picked up and a tornado of paper exploded in his room. Applications, posts, invoices ("NOT THE INVOICES!!! How will I steal Wyv's monies now?" Orlan cried), votes, polls and everything else imaginable became a swirling vortex of words....and paper cuts...ow ow ow ow the paper cuts.

 

Then, like Rosemary on a thursday, the room's mood changed violently. Violently calm, that is. Orlan, who was caught up in the blast, suddenly found himself thirty-five feet up in the air along with his Phd Dissertation on the Edibility of body chocolate and the effect on the female psyche all around him.

 

"Crap," Orlan said as the winds ceased. Like a ton of feathers, Orlan fell to the ground, becoming buried in papers upon papers upon papers upon papers. The Elder of Bards and the Sexy Sexy Man grumbled to himself as all he could see right now was Peredhil's recipie for "Everybody Love One Another Chip Dip" (It's brotherly love-good!). "Hmm...I didn't know he used SOylent green in that recipie..." Orlan said to nobody in particular.

 

Orlan let loose a roar of power and the papers above he erupted into a shower of tree-hugging fury. Orlan stood in the center of a hole devoid of his pulped enemy. A few papers filtered down back into the hole and Orlan reached out and grabbed one.

 

"Dear Orlan, RE: 1924 New Years party! Please make sure to bring the fireworks this year..." Orlan read aloud. "Hmm....some of these might be a touch old." Another piece of paper floated down and Orlan reached out and snatched it from the air. He glanced over it once, and then twice, and then once again. He got a smirk on his face that was quickly replaced with a scowl (albeit, a Sexy Sexy Scowl). "Something needs to be done about this," Orlan said to himself as he folded the note and placed it in his cloak.

 

Orlan vanished an appeared in the main courtyard of the Pen. People were milling around here and there, Reading, wRiteing and aRithmaticing generally not paying attention. Orlan solved that. Lightning surrounded his fist and Orlan smashed it into the fountain beside him. The fountain exploded.

 

"YUI-CHAN!!! GET OUT HERE!!" Orlan roared. People ducked and ran for cover, avoiding the flying pieces of architecture. Noone really knew what to do at this rampaging Elder (and a Sexy Sexy one at that). Orlan did not see his target anywhere and so he took off with a determined stride. Blue and red lightning flickered all over his body, ocassionally finding alternate paths to ground through the occasional piece of artwork, statue, or Inspector I.M. Clueless. Members ran for thier lives, hid, or just stared at Orlan with a fear to end all fears (ZOMGSCARYLAZERPEWPEWPEW!!!).

 

Orlan rampaged through the assembly room, shattering tables, chairs, someone's sonnet about the futility of life and how they want to die (they were, consequently, blasted into a nether dimension filled with cute little baby bunnies who would endlessly cheer you up by snuggling you, talk about your ironing....the laundry). Orlan did pause and walk over to a small group of newer Pen members who were huddled in a group. He reached out to a young blonde one.

 

"Hi there," Orlan said, his voice dripping with Sexyness™© "My name's Orlan and I'm the Elder of Bards. I'm also a Libra who enjoys long walks on the beach, total world domination and pages 1 to 673 in Orlan's Kama Sutra. If you need anything feel free to stop by and let me know, my bed is alwa....er my door is always open. You have a nice day now." He patted her on the cheek and then turned back to his path, the lightning flaring up again and his scowl once again present.

 

When he smashed the wall into the Caberert Room he saw her. "YUI!" Orlan roared. Yui sat in the corner, a book in her lap and a cup of tea in her hand. Shadows bent around her, obscuring her from mosts view, but Orlan saw all.

 

"Yes, Orlan-san?" Yui asked with a arched eyebrow.

 

"What do you think you're doing?" Orlan shouted.

 

"Having some tea and reading 'The Shadows and You' by Liberace," Yui said. "Why? Is there a problem?"

 

"A Problem?!" Lightning jumped from Orlan's shoulder and slammed into the cappucio machine, spraying Double Frappuchino Mocha Latte Grande all over the room. "I sure as hell do! What do you think you've been doing to my Pen?"

 

"Pardon?" Yui asked, setting her tea cup down on the table.

 

"I am gone for a few months and I come back and you've changed the very structure of the pen, going in all the nooks and crannies and changing things without my say so!" Orlan roared. Yui's eyes squinted slightly as she focused on Orlan.

 

"I did what I did for the betterment of The Pen, Orlan-san," Yui said, closing her book. Shadows began to curl protectively around her some more. "And I thought it was 'everybodys' Pen."

 

"What gave you that idea? I AM THE PEN! I'm the reason it exists! How DARE you change things without me!" Orlan ranted on. Every exclamation point he hit the energy around him seemed to flare up more and more.

 

"I don't think I care for your tone, Orlan," Yui said, standing up. The shadows gathered around her fully, encasing all but her face. Her eyes glowed a soft purple.

 

"CARE?! CARE?!!!" Orlan gestured with his hand and lightning arched around Yui, slamming into the wall behind her, obliterating it. "Where was the care when you went off changing things? You had no RIGHT!" Orlan roared.

 

"RIGHT!?" Yui shouted back. "I do too have a right! I'm a member of The Pen like anyone else!" The shadows that were around her slithtered out like snakes on the ground before her. They curled they were towards Orlan, testing the ground here and there but always avoiding the random bolts of lighting that struck.

 

"A member yes but do you think you deserve the say you have? What...do you think you're a bard?" Orlan said, stressing the last word with a hard edge. Yui clenched her hand tightly at the word. Yui's shadows moved swiftly, surrouding Orlan. Then, like claws coming up, they slammed hard into Orlan's lightning. Things flared....babies cried...teeth gnashed....Lewis Black went on a triade of Starbucks next to other Starbucks...and in general all that could be heard was the screams of magic.

 

"...Because you are," came Orlan's voice softly. Suddenly all the magic vanished, and, if it were possible for shadows to fall on thier butts, that's what happened.

 

"What?" Yui asked, a confused look on her face. The shadows around her vanished and all that was left was Orlan, a horribly disarming smile across his face, and Yui, stun-struck.

 

"Well ya see," Orlan started as he reached into his cloak. "I cam across..." Orlan pulled out a banana, looked at it oddly, and threw it over his shoulder "...my list of candidates from..." Orlan reached in and grabbed out a rubber chicken, looked both ways suspiciously, making sure Zool wasn't looking, and then shoved the chicken back in his cloak "...a while ago and well..." Orlan pulled out a top hat from his cloak and gave a triumphant "w00t".

 

"..I'm a little behind on things. But since nothing I ever say is law," Orlan reached into the top hat with a flourish that would have made David Blaine blue with water poisoning and grabbed hold of something. He gave it a tug but it did not seem to want to give. Orlan let go of the hat and stuck both his hands in. The hat stayed where it was, floating in the air. Orlan gave a heave and, in a completely unexplainable phenomenon, Orlan pulled Gwaihir out of the top hat by the back of his shirt.

 

"There we go," Orlan said, dropping the vice-loremaster on the ground. "Now then, if you'll excuse me, I have alot more papers to go through...There's never any rest for the Sexy." Orlan snatched the top hat out of the air and turned and walked away. A few steps away, Orlan placed the hat atop his own head and, like a brick, it fell over him, encompassing him and making him vanish into the hat. The top hat bounced once on the ground and then, in a similar fashion, it vanished into itself....leaving chaos and confusion (Orlan's resume headers) behind it.

[Gwaihir]

Yui, you deserve it. Congratulations.

 

All welcome to our newest bard!

[Peredhil]

Oh! AWESOME!

 

Big huge huggles!!!!

[Mynx]

Congratulations Yui

[Ayshela]

SwEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEt!

*tacklehugs Yui*

Congrats, you SO deserve this!!!

[Zadown]

Welcome to the club Yui! *grin*

[Gyrfalcon]

Congratulations Yui-chan, you've more then earned the title.

[Sweetcherrie]

So much hugging! Stoomp stared from Orlan to Yui-Chan. They seemed to be the basic huggers of the hugfest going on. And though he had no idea why there was so much hugging, he definitely had to join in. He blinked as Orlan disappeared, one less person to hug, but then new people streamed in to huggle the Elder of Shadows.

 

A slow grin appeared on his face as he saw Gwaihir hugging as well, he seemed nice, but his eyes grew big when he saw Ayshela tacklehug Yui.

 

She must be the uberhugger of them all! Stoomp was stepping from foot to foot, as if they were burning to move as well. Then he could no longer hold back. With Teddy in his hand he shuffled closer, and the moment Ayshela had let go of Yui-Chan, Stoomp extended his arms and hugged the new bard tightly.

 

“Izze gooooood hugging!” He squeaked.

 

OOC: Congratulations

[Gryphon]

Well done Yui.

 

Congratulations on your promotion.

[Zariah]

Congrats!!!! I think this is well deserved and you rock!

[Finnius]

 

 

 

Wheeeeeeeee!

 

Congrats!

[Annael]

Congrats Yui, muchly deserved

[Appy]

Congratulations! 'Bout time too

[Wyvern]

Wyvern slips across the Double Frappuchino Mocha Latte Grande spread over the floor, lifting his wings for balance and skating in unstable twists. The overgrown lizard spins and slides by Gryphon at a dangerous angle, yelping as the tall stack of paperwork in his claws tilts to the left. He grits his teeth and dips a horn, performing a Triple Salamander Lootz and Tail Twirl that might have gotten a seven in a draconic scale skater competition. The lizard flips into the air in a somersault of flailing arms and paperwork flight patterns, crying out and soaring forward face down. He clutches a couple of remaining papers in his claws as he slides across the slippery Cabaret floor, and conveniently comes to a halt at Yui-chan’s feet.

 

"Uurrrgh." Wyvern twitches on the floor for a moment, then plants his tail stinger in the ground and lifts himself with a cough. “Hiya *cough* Yui. How’sss tricks?”

 

Wyvern wipes the sludge from his face and flashes a wide grin, then glances in both directions and raises a claw to Yui’s ear.

 

“Psssssssst, I think they might’ve finally found out about your secret Bard identity. Jussst givin’ you a heads up in case the news rats try to put a spin on this now that it’s public knowledge. Checking with Grim Squeaker for ‘legal advice’.”

 

Wyvern distances his snout from Yui’s ear and begins whistling an off-key tune. He stares at the ceiling as he shifts through the miraculously dry papers in his claws, then extends one in Yui’s direction while maintaining his nonchalant expression.

 

“Petition for a Private Bard Golden Lavatory Tanning Booth?” Yui stares at the sheet with a blank expression, noticing that the list of names signed on it consists of Wyvern’s familiar scrawl repeated five times. “Clause I: amidst the Private Lavatory, the toilet paper shall consist of the softest of ancient writing parchments…?”

 

“Oh, about Claussse VI.” Wyvern points a claw further down the page. “The scantily clad vixen masseuse – I can add in a sub-Clause that rotates it between a succubi and a Scantavia brother based on daily shifts. Wouldn’t want ya to feel left out!”

 

“Hmm.” Yui frowns as her eyes skim further down the page, reading over Clause IV’s detailed descriptions of Wyvern-shaped geld donation bins, which are thinly guised as a money-raising method for expensive soap. "Hmm."

 

“C’mooon.” Wyvern tilts his head over Yui’s shoulder to try to see which passage she’s reading, obstructing her view with his snout in the process. “It might even make the whole Bard thing useful! You did read the bit about the telekinetic lighting adjussstment system that’d be installed, right? I’ll let ya think about it.”

 

Wyvern grins and winks, then turns to go but stops short. Yui-chan breaths in a sharp breath as Wyvern turns back around and gives her a big Frappuchino-soaked hug, letting the caffeinated beverage trickle down her attire. He smiles a genuine smile.

 

“Congratulationsss, Yui-chan.”

 

Wyvern turns again to go, only to slip over a banana that somebody dropped. He sails past Gyrfalcon and Annael with a scream, only to trip over a kneeling Stoomp and roll across the ground until he reaches a halt as Finnius plants a heel.

 

“Urgh.”

 

;-)

[Patrick]

Congratulations Yui! You certainly are one who deserves the title.

[Yui-chan]

Gwaihir. Zariah. Stoomp. Gyr. Patrick, Gryphon, Finnius, Annael, Peredhil, Mynx, Ayshela, Appy, Wyvern, even Zadown! ... not to mention Orlan himself. Yui-chan starts out in shock and quickly progresses to simply overwhelmed, smiling and shaking hands and returning hugs in an utter daze. It's no small bit of news, nothing less than a monumental honor, and for the Elder of Shadows, accepting and admitting worthiness to herself are not insignificant efforts. Yet the Pen doesn't give her much room for doubt. With so many friends crowding around, their proud smiles and heartfelt praise ringing in her ears, she can't do anything less than bask in the glow of their regard and try not to blush at all the attention and kindness. Better than a Bardship is the incontrovertible proof that these people she loves truly love her in return.

 

"Thank you all," Yui says when the hubbub has finally eased. "I can't tell you how much this honor means to me, nor how much I appreciate everyone's good will and warmth. I will do my best to stay always worthy of the title of Bard and your regard."

 

When she follows the words with a low, long bow, she gives every appearance of simply being her usual humble self, but the truth is that she stares at the floor so long because she needs a few moments to hide the grateful tears in her eyes.

 

Most sincerely,

~Yui

[Katzaniel]

A tall, thin, curly-haired throwaway character peeks his head into the room. He looks around, overhears Yui's speech, and prances a few steps toward her. With pale hands he adjusts his black T-shirt, which reads "Emissary of Katzaniel", before coughing and finally speaking.

 

"Please Yui," he manages with his thin, whistle-like voice, "Katz loves you, too. She was just waiting to reply until she was able to write more than a few words. In fact, ..." Suddenly the man stands up perfectly straight, his eyes popping out of his head a bit. "G..er... Writing words? Huh? And how could Katz have sent me to say this when I just wandered in in time to overhear Yui's speech? In fact... Yui didn't even say the part about us loving her out loud! What's going on here?" He starts to spasm, his eyes bulging more and more.

 

A team of characters rushes into the room, all wearing the same black T-shirt, though each unique in their own right. The red-headed one tries to whisper something into the first man's ears, while the elderly asian man and the overweight blonde girl quickly and efficiently set up an emergency cot and gently coerce him into it. By this point he's spurting random syllables and his mouth is frothing a bit, so an extraordinarily tall man puts him out of his misery with some liquid from a large needle. Within moments, the team has picked up the cot and hustled back out of the room.

 

OOC: Congratulations, indeed. It's well-deserved. And I'm so proud of you!