Tasslehoff

Arwen - As Parmenion mentioned we were trying to help. If you felt over whelmed, please tell us so.

You dont see what you do to me, Hiding in the dark corners of the room, You dont see that when I am around you I cant be me, You keep me locked up, Hidden away, Full of pain and hate, I gave everything I could, But I dont get anything back from you, I don't need this kind of shit, Why do I care? I just want to hide away, Be Myself, Not ever talking to you again, I just wish I could dilute the memories of you out my head, I just want close my eyes and believe non of it is true, There is no need for you to speak another word, There is nothing more for me to listen to, I have listened to you damn lies, I have put up with your bullshit and falsified purity, I wasted everything one you, Wasted it on stupid imaturity, I kind of decided to post this after reading Arwens post " Beat Me ". It reminded me of how sometimes you try to leave and forget but you just cant. Love. It can leave such a bad taste in your mouth, and bad feelings in your heart. Well I will be off.

lol. That was funny.. funny.. I like the pot pot pot line.. made me smile..

Arwen - This is a very heart felt poem.. It brings much sadness to the reader and intrances the reader (atleast me) to read further to see if she does change.. ITs so hard to change. Done wrong but you keep going back. You wonder why and say no, but you just cant.. Its a sad ordeal. Onto the poetic talk though.. I copied your poem below and higlighted anything in blue and put *my* correction in parenthesis (red) As it is already good poem, it could use some work.. Too many tears ive cried for you To much crap you put me through "Why?" The voice asks inside my head I look at myself and more tears i shead. "Look what you did (do) to yourself!".the voices screams Its true i did this to myself but i did not mean ( I understand you are trying to keep the rhyming going, but its seems rushed and almost just doesnt quite fit) You ripped out my heart and stood on it Just like all the others, you hit Beat me to a bloody pulp I cryd (cried) but (I) came back asking for more Each time i forgave you Im stupid its true But this is the price i pay for love (?) "Maybe its me?", (a) quiet voice says I think and go through the day thinking its me ( As I think, and go through my day thinking its me ) He comes home and i fix him his tea I smile and say "its ok ill change" He looks at me with big angry eyes "Please dont hit me!", i beg But he hits and he hits until i fall and hit my head I get up and relise (realize) im dead I know im stupid I know its true But please do not let this be you (Id maybe add the above line again. Kind of give it the "Pleeing" line. As in, you are crying.. and repeating it over and over again trying to help others escape from what you went through.) I hope you dont feel I was too harsh. Waiting to read your next one.

Its been a friday for so long, since I havent been working for almost 2 weeks

HmMm. I did a little looking over this old one. Reworked. Added a bit.. TOok a bit out.. This is what I came with. =- Unrelenting -= As the night falls The memories cry out Tears fall from the blue eyes Lined with detest and love The past envelops the present While the future is hindered Where to run to, where to hide Darkness everywhere, Unrelenting As the time in front slows I remember moving to fast And along came the grateful past Filtering out the bad, the disgust Emphasizing the good, those moments Yet the darkness everywhere, Surrounds me! The foolish lies that have followed The fruitless tears that lay upon my cheek The void happiness swallowed me without a glance The acute darkness surrounds me.. I cant stand it.. Its all too much. Its.. Its.. Its.. UNRELENTING!

All ok here in the coastal state of California. Though its not the East Coast, I thought Id let you all know I am doing ok.. I actually have so much more time on my hands.. ( Quit work and have less than a month before Boot Camp ).. Well Chit Chat later. I have a softball game to go too.. Ciao

Sabre, it is good to see a poem out of you. You have very good thoughts inside your head, and I like seeing you writing them down every now and then.. I like this poem, though I feel it needs work, maybe a bit more too it, help it flow. But hey, Im just a critic..

Very nice peom you have written yourself Vlad. Keep on writing. Ciao

Though I am probably really late, Happy Birthday My Friend.. -Ciao-

Humbly walking through the halls of The Pen for a quick visit, he knowticed a slight talk of the new Harry Potter series.. Deciding * why not * , The small kender wanders into to discussion, and says: Dont know why, dont mind too much, but I have read each H.P. book and seen each H.P. movie.. I find then quite ok.. They arent the greatest, but when bored, and the books there, no harm to pick it up. And I see the movie to see the differences between book & movie, and thats always *fun*.. Well once again, I must depart.. Good Day Pen.. Ciao

Its kind of ironic. Just a few days ago I posted to the pen and its members that I was going to try to be here more often and help out more often, yet since that day, I havent been back.. -sigh - I am afraid I am saying good bye this time.. I feel my time as a poet / writer has disapeared. A new wind of talent has doused my flames, and well, I have personally doused my own flames. Good Luck to you all, and have fun. Tasslehoff

Eh, I saw the Second MAtrix and it seemd just like the first one, and tell you the truth, sitting around through an hour of credits wasnt worth the showing of the next previews..

I must say, I read over this poem quite quickly but I still grabbed the concept of it, and I trully loved the poem. So much raw emption of love and pain and the needing of another. Way to produce such feelings onto paper, its so hard.. Good Job Senora Butterfly

You tried and it came out beautiful Elvida. The things with poems is that they can be any style, can say anything, but if you tried, if you portrayed what you wanted, then you did a good jon. I like this poem a lot. It speaks loudly due to the understanding of loosing someones love and not gaining it back.. But as my mom said to me & I will repeat onto you: There are many many more fish in the sea So cheer up girl, all will be well, I promise.. Chat with you sometime?

It is amazing how one touch, of a certain person can change your whole view on life, change the whole pace of your day. I know its that way with my g.f. This poem, short & sweet, is just that. I mean, what more can you say. Its perfeect the way it is. No need to expand it, no need to change anything. Very well done Wren.

The simplicity of this poem speaks wonders. Its so deep, so harsh, so painful, yet the words, they speak to you clearly, no needed to find the secret meanings. Very good poem.. It just speaks out to me, catches my attention, and to me, that is 1 of the many things that makes a poem a good poem

Vincent, I give you my deepest sympathys. You are in no way needed to apologize for an absence under such terms. I unfortunatly have run into a situation like that before. It was actually my ex-girlfriend/best friend who lives but 10 minutes away. Unfortunatly, he got away with what he did. But enough about me, though I do not pray, I send you and your girlfriend my best wishes, and hope everything works itself out.

Tell you what Jeff, as we have talked before, many times on the topic of love and the horrors it brings along with it, I will repaeat myself.. One just has to wait.. It will come.. Crud, it smacked me right in the head so hard just recently.. I like the poem a lot though, it shows how easy one can answer there own questions, but still want a better answer.

I do like this poem Reverie. Glad you decided to post it, but I think to actually trully like it I would have to understand its meaning, and to tell you the truth, I do not catch its meaning. Could you explain it to me in a bit of detail if you get a chance? Like Peredhil mentioned, minor spelling but otherwise good.

That was a really damn good story right there. I enjoyed that much

Not quite sure what Peredhil was saying, but I know this is the first of any of your poems I have read Z and I do like it. The concept of thought was definitly a good topic and one you can verse well with. Nice one .

Falcon. You guys have a Hot Topic too? HmMm. Cools! I got a great sticker from there. Talks about penguins stealing my sanity. Classic. Its great.. Well anywho.. Very interesting poem on the hatred and perception on whether or not you missed her, or he stole her. Its often hard to tell what exactly happened.. Clearify it exactly, and this poem shows that. Should we really hate the other person cause they gained where we lost? Is it there fault? Anywho. I suppose I am really just mumbling at this point.. I like the poem though. New style of writing. New thoughts.. Very well done.

So lately I have had this huge writers block / brain fart going on. I dont know really why, but its like, I have all this time, but non what so ever, you know? Earlier tonight while hanging out at my girlfriends and watching Miss Universe and commenting on there looks and such I started to realize why I havent been writing. The answer! The answer to this mysterious question. Its the simple fact I am happy.

Hey Degosis.. Happy Birthday