Peredhil

This is a neat word-picture and would make a great intro to a fantasy novel. A few nick-picks I noticed: To keep the meter consistent in stanza two, "leaf strewn" should be "leaf-strewn". Maybe remove the "a" in "or a stealthy footfall"? In the next line, "Where are thee brothers" would have to be "Where are thee, brothers," to make sense to me. Something about the flow of the 4th stanza seems awkward - maybe read aloud and tweak? I normally don't pick on things like this, but I feel this could be a really good piece with a bit of tweaking.

Oddly fascinating twisted word order. I could read several things into this, but I'm not certain that any of them fit the whole. I did like it though.

Students, friends, life... This reflects a lot of groups. I know it takes energy and commitment to maintain remote connections in a world of immediate demands. Sad how someone so important in the present can become a distant memory in a moment.

Very clever! Reminds me of James Joyce, or perhaps even more of John Lennon.

Love's love is held out for lovers, while a Romanticist is never alone while able to dream...

I like this, although too often I feel alone in my thoughts. I still smile though.

I've loved the word "Morpheus" since I first heard the Rocky Horror Picture Show soundtrack. That said, a tight focused poem with excellent word choice.

Wow. Interesting imagery and a savage commentary.

Evocative and sensual without being obscene. You really captured a feeling that transcends bodies and sex. Well written.

Wow, I'm so blessed you posted another of these, because I'd missed all the rest. These vignettes are really excellently written. Your use of the senses brings them to life for me. *hugs* I wish, my friend, I were as together as I seem to you, for I too have a myriad of faults on which I work! Perhaps we are so different after all?

Peredhil puts finishing touches on the Birthday Room, which is decorated as a gentle glade in a forest. Babbling brooks lend their music to the scene, as ivy gently links the trees in love. Small kittens play innocently, so sweet even cat-haters melt. Elladan, a welcome yet surprising addition to Peredhil's plans, sets about security, securing perimeters and setting wards so subtly that no one need be offended. Intelligent and aware of the irony, Elladan realizes the he has a weak spot for the shy girl. How in the world had he turned around and realized that she was inside all his barriers? Smiling slightly at himself, he continued with his task. "Youse really missed a great time on dat date Nunce." Nuncio sighed as he readjusted the streamers Guido had knocked down as his brother gestured largely. Guido had been talking in this vein since midnight. His date with Ayshela was one of the most pleasant times of the last five years to him tell him. Tuning Guido out, the portly pig double-checked his weapons and spell-items. He'd won the contest and got to be Ayshela's Bodyguard for the party. Elrohir wandered around, apparently doing little but smiling as he watched the others, observant as always. Throwing open the Party Room door, they began the Elder's celebration.

*hug-pounce-happy birthday!!!*

*hugs* This is timely. Thank you for giving words to a feeling difficult to express.

I take this poem very personally. It is elegant and describes my aching body preparing for another beautiful day. If I'd planned on living to be this old, I think I would've made safer choices when I was younger.

Both very good. Daughter - "Im" should be "I'm".

'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'. Dave Barry

My birthday was good. Hoping my joy was shared by the others. *hugs all around*

Nods Good points you have there.

I like this post. For serious writing and development, I go to Arcane Artistry. They're really good writers, and excellent at cultivating writers. The Pen is a polite place where people meet to have fun. To be creative and play off each other. To heal and laugh and cry together. To be understood, or if not understood, accepted. A Pennite doesn't have to like all other members, or any. They just have tolerate them. Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs and views. A Pennite accepts that others may disagree and allows them the same freedom to have a point of view. Maybe the Pen has gotten too serious, too rigid about being correct. One thing I do know. The Good Doctor *deserves* that Weenie he wears with Pride! Hugs Doctor Evil and runs away laughing before he's hit.

Peredhil hangs his head in shame. As usual Doc', you cut to the heart of the matter instead of focusing on the symptom. This ouch, for me, deserves a thank you to you.

Katz has my question perfectly. Why is this Trolling post here? They didn't ask for help in correcting the numerous spelling and grammar errors... -Confused Peredhil

Happy birthday!

Welcome back. When you are absent, we long for your presence - not for what you do, but for who you are. When you are present, we rejoice. *hugs*

*hugs* In my experience, it's not hard to do the right thing. What is hard is to keep from comparing to others who aren't. Personally, I'm incredibly proud of the man you've grown into. -Peredhil

Happy Birthday huggles to two great people.