Rune Posted March 4, 2003 Report Share Posted March 4, 2003 Written at midnight, on a work night..while exhausted..and upset..and ready to give up..so it might have some errors, but it wont be rewritten. Another day gone by. In our darkness moments of saddness when the world feels hollow and empty and our minds are numb from exhaustion we give up hope on tomorrow. The wind howls through the spaces cut deep in our soul from the lies and the world continues to live unaware of what has passed. My heart breaks from sadness my mind reels with anger my hands tremble with frustration my soul slips away. Unaware of consequences the thoughts of biased freedom I give up on this lifetime I will fight no more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peredhil Posted March 4, 2003 Report Share Posted March 4, 2003 This is really really good at conveying the feelings. What I call a 'gut' poem. The last line, for me, gives emotional echos of Chief Joseph of the Nez Perce when the U.S. Calvary caught he and his tribe 16 miles from the Canadian border and he made a speech which ended, "I will fight no more." That's gotta be one of the most poignant cries in the English language. Big huggles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tasslehoff Posted March 5, 2003 Report Share Posted March 5, 2003 awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww *hugs Rune for a whole 10 minutes.. Lets go.. and then hugs her again not wanting to let go* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gwaihir Posted March 5, 2003 Report Share Posted March 5, 2003 I know I've already told you this is an incredible poem, but it reallly is! Lovely use of metaphor, lovely last line indeed...lovely poem. really good stuff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blondemoon Posted March 5, 2003 Report Share Posted March 5, 2003 Ye gods this is good Rune. *huggles* Peredhil is right, it's very good at conveying the emotions and feelings behind it, even if the person reading hasn't experienced them themselves. and the world continues to live unaware of what has passed. So true... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justin Silverblade Posted March 5, 2003 Report Share Posted March 5, 2003 Magnificent poetry, as it seems, can be expected from you Rune. Peredhil said it best, and it certainly is powerful poetry. Thanks so much for sharing. - Justin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SoaringIcarus Posted March 9, 2003 Report Share Posted March 9, 2003 Very nice work. For me, this poem reflects on the the tail-end of winter in the middle of the night. That in combination with the author's feelings, well executed. And although you might not have intended it, your non-poem introduction fits rather nicely with it. Same mood. It's a rare thing I like to call "Genuine." Congratulations, -Icarus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archaneus Posted March 9, 2003 Report Share Posted March 9, 2003 Wow. This is great, Rune. I really enjoyed, write more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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