Marishka Lyn Posted September 7, 2003 Report Share Posted September 7, 2003 "departure" goodbye you won't be seeing me again moving on away from this, away from you and those hurtful words you say when you think i can't hear i'm sick of everything, the inferiority, the isolation do you know i'm even there? or more important, do you care? if i stay or if i go... it doesn't matter you don't care, never have, never will i'm just another deductible on your taxes you could care less about my hopes or my dreams did you know i want more more than this life more than the insecurity i wish that you noticed once in a while the tone in my laugh or the glimmer of my smile but you won't you can't you don't understand you make me feel like there isn't anything you make me feel like giving up Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peredhil Posted September 7, 2003 Report Share Posted September 7, 2003 Nice first post! Sounds like this person missed a true gem. Peredhil hugs the new-comer welcome. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Appy Posted September 7, 2003 Report Share Posted September 7, 2003 *Appy agrees* A very fine read, good job *welcoms and hugs aswell* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tattered Posted September 8, 2003 Report Share Posted September 8, 2003 Sounds like a lot of unhealthy relationships. I think you wrote this about a parent right? I thought it was about a love relationship, but the tax deductable part came in and I realized parent-child.Ya know, and that's just it, children always seem attracted to people that treat them like their family did. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peredhil Posted September 8, 2003 Report Share Posted September 8, 2003 (could be 'spouse - non-working spouse', or 'elderly parent living with' tax deduction too. Peredhil, who sees too many shades of gray sometimes.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marishka Lyn Posted September 9, 2003 Author Report Share Posted September 9, 2003 Sounds like a lot of unhealthy relationships. I think you wrote this about a parent right? I thought it was about a love relationship, but the tax deductable part came in and I realized parent-child.Ya know, and that's just it, children always seem attracted to people that treat them like their family did. yes, it is about my family...i'm in a healthy relationship for once though :wizzie: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayshela Posted September 10, 2003 Report Share Posted September 10, 2003 good for you, and glad to hear it! and glad to see you find your voice. welcome! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wyvern Posted September 12, 2003 Report Share Posted September 12, 2003 Marishka Lyn sighs as she lies back in her applicant easychair, glancing towards a grandfather clock located in the far corner of the room in order to check the time. The eager applicant had been waiting in the office for quite a while now, and though several kind Pen members had provided her with feedback and comments, she had yet to hear from the Recruiter himself... Suddenly, Marishka's thoughts are interrupted as a she hears a low chanting approaching the office from a hall nearby: "Hi ho, hi ho We dwarves have changed you know Some old have passed, they've still got class Hi ho... hi ho hi ho hi ho..." Marishka quickly raises herself from her seat as the door to the office suddenly bursts open and six quirky-looking dwarves march in in a single file line. Each of the Elder dwarves greets and bows to Marishka Lyn before gathering around her application poem and discussing it amongst themselves. As Bravery is the bravest of the dwarves, he is naturally the first to speak up: "I admire the bravery of the narrator of this poem, as her moving on must have taken a great deal of courage... for this reason, I think that the application should be accepted!" Greedy, who is standing right beside Bravery, rubs his scaly chin thoughtfully and hisses: "I too can relate to the work... though personally, I sympathize with the antagonist of the piece. After all, anyone who can interpret the narrator's leaving as a reduction of their taxes can't be half bad!" Shiny is next in the line of Elder dwarves, and reads over the poem thoroughly before exclaiming: "Oooooo! She mentioned the "glimmer" of her smile! It's definitely acceptable in my book..." After Shiny has finished admiring the piece, Sexy glances at it and murmers: "Well... she's certainly open..." Before Sexy can continue, Silly the orangutan Elder dwarf swings from the ceiling by his tail and snatches the application poem, reading it over a few times while hanging upside down before dropping back down to the ground. The Elder dwarf then pulls out a sign and scribbles something onto it before holding it up for all to see. The sign reads: "I too like the poem, and can particularly relate to the concept of isolation being the only truly intelligent orangutan currently residing in the Pen." Finally, Silly's shadow takes on a life of it's own to form Shady the Elder dwarf, who whispers: "Of hurtful words, and fallen hopes... Her heart's desire, caught 'pon the ropes... Of emotions, often neglected... This application, shall be accepted." With that, the Elder dwarves all nod to each other and stamp Marishka Lyn's application ACCEPTED. ;-) OOC: A good poem and an ACCEPTED application, Marishka... welcome to the Mighty Pen! I hope you find us a warm and acceptant creative writing community, and I apologize for the confusion of posting this and accepting you again. ;p There was a slight database error which deleted my response in this thread and changed your status, but it should be corrected now. Once again, welcome! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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