Alaeha Posted February 20, 2003 Report Share Posted February 20, 2003 An acquaintance recommended you after reading my poems, and from what I've read, I like this crowd. So here we go... Behold my application, one of my better poems: Blood and Tears She lies in a puddle, her blood slowly flows from her wounds as her life drips away. Her shirt, though once white, turns as red as a rose and in pain, doomed to die, there she’ll lay. He sits by a wall with a knife in his hand, he knows that he too will soon die. He’s killed all that fought for this renegade band and he now asks the dead only “Why?” “The two of us loved, we’d have lived lives of bliss. We’d never have hurt you, we left you alone. And now that you’ve hurt her, who I’ll sorely miss... You killed her, and only your lives could atone. You’ve taken the light and the good from the earth, her death leaves me empty and cold. I never have felt such great pain since my birth, so my soul, for revenge, I have sold.” Now a dark light fills the air, lifting the load he must bear. As he rises, so does she. His faces twists in agony. With a gasp he feels release, as his conscience’ workings cease. Then he leaves her to her fears, in the darkness disappears. In the deepest dark she sees rippling as if in a breeze one small puddle, blood and tears. As she falls down to her knees, she weeps at what her love has done. He ne’er again shall see the sun. With just a prayer that “this will do” she quickly ends her own life too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rune Posted February 20, 2003 Report Share Posted February 20, 2003 Ooo, very very good. Well met Alaeha! I am so very glad you have found your way to the pen. Good luck on your app! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alaeha Posted February 20, 2003 Author Report Share Posted February 20, 2003 Bleh... sorry... Forgot to post email address. If you'd like to talk to me, email me at Benx2@earthlink.net or look for Alaeha on AIM. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kasmandre Posted February 20, 2003 Report Share Posted February 20, 2003 Wow, I like it. Welcome to the Pen, Alaeha. I hope to read more of your work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reverie Posted February 21, 2003 Report Share Posted February 21, 2003 very well done... would say more but have blinding headache from breathing in too much superheated fiberglass(don't ask) revery the dreamlost " " the dream continues... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tasslehoff Posted February 21, 2003 Report Share Posted February 21, 2003 Words escape my lips as I try to speak.. Very Good! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archaneus Posted February 21, 2003 Report Share Posted February 21, 2003 Great poem. You can join teh ranks of the dark an dmorbid writers with Deadly Nightshade, and I and many others here that escape me at this moment. Welcome to the Pen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elvida Posted February 22, 2003 Report Share Posted February 22, 2003 whoa...that was great...i humbly bow before the master/mistress of morbid poetry...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoomGaze Posted February 23, 2003 Report Share Posted February 23, 2003 where are all these great poets coming from, ever since i moved in, more people with greater talent have stepped up to the plate.. jeez, i might as well retire early but then again, i like writing poetry. Welcome to the Pen Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wyvern Posted March 2, 2003 Report Share Posted March 2, 2003 Alaeha fidgets in her applicant easy chair nervously as Melba the Almost Secretary of Initiates angrily paces back and forth through the Recruiter's Office, once again furious at Wyvern's tardiness. It was one thing for the overgrown lizard to be slightly late in responding to an application poem... but it was another thing entirely when the Elder was not only over a week late in responding to the application, but also 5 days late for the "surprise" birthday party Melba had hoped to hold for the applicant on the 27th of February. Due to the amount of time that had passed since Melba had wanted to hold the party, all of the animal balloons had become deflated and now bore more of a ressemblance to tapeworms than they did poodles... The birthday cake of 16 candles had even begun to gather mold... Melba stops her pacing for a moment in order to tear off the party hat she was wearing and furiously toss the party noisemaker she had been holding out of the office window. The party favor soars through the air at an unnatural speed, actually leveling a mountain several hundred miles away in an enormous sonic explosion at the end of it's trajectory. Grinding her teeth and rapidly losing control of her temper, Melba lets out a tremendous roar similar to that of a gorilla on steroids and points an accusing finger at the Wyvern dart board she had set up on the interior of the main office door. Alaeha jumps from her seat slightly as Melba quickly grabs the nearest easy chair and tosses it at the dart board in her fury... Wyvern barges into the office door at this very moment and is immediatly hit by the easy chair, getting violently knocked back a few steps and colliding with Canid, who is rushing to the nearest Pen restroom facilities after having eaten a fizzy monster that didn't quite seem to be agreeing with her stomach... Briefly apologizing to Canid while recovering from his collision, Wyvern brushes off the dust, loose fur, and chair splinters from his tunic and then rushes into the office. The overgrown lizard sets down a large briefcase he had been carrying and bows to Alaeha, thoroughly apologizing for his lateness. "I found some fresh wilderness to invest in that is bound to soar in value in a few years..." Wyvern explains gleefully "... but unfortunatly, it's located several hundred miles away from the Pen and thus the trip back here took quite a while." Having said this, the overgrown lizard takes Alaeha's application and reads over it a few times, grinning and commenting on how he remembers the first time he sold his soul to Satan... though that was for geld rather than revenge. Having thoroughly enjoyed reading over the poem, the overgrown lizard stamps Alaeha's application "ACCEPTED" before his office phone suddenly rings... a red light flashing underneath it signifying that the call has to do with geld. Immediatly rushing to the phone and picking it up, Wyvern lets out a tormented cry of dismay as the voice on other side of the line informs him that the wilderness he had invested in had become utterly destroyed due to a sonic explosion of some sort... Melba grins to herself happily, blowing into a party noisemaker and winking happily to the newly accepted applicant... ;p OOC: A very good application, Alaeha, I greatly enjoyed your poem. It's certainly ACCEPTED... Welcome to the Mighty Pen! I'll send you some more Pen info some time in the near future... A happy (very) belated birthday as well, and my apologies for the lateness in responding. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoomGaze Posted March 2, 2003 Report Share Posted March 2, 2003 congrats and good job on being accepted Not too many people pass the application status under Wyvern Tyranny () Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jareena Faye Posted March 5, 2003 Report Share Posted March 5, 2003 Well that was well written... but so full of sadness and despair. There is a hope and meaning to life... what are you trying to convey in this story? That love hurts? That revenge is sweet? I'm not trying to criticize you or anything, I just think these posts help a writer develop more than a "that was good" kind of thing. (In my experience, anyway.) PM me sometime! Keep writing! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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