Tanuchan Posted March 7, 2004 Report Share Posted March 7, 2004 About the only thing that concerns me is the title - what happens if someone want to write up the first werewolf story? It's sort of too late to change the title, but I think it would be less confusing if for the third one we skip right to III and the rest of the chronicles are numbered at the same place as the games. Yeah, I thought about it, also. But I considered that starting with Chronicles II would be as confusing for people. Dean does intend to write the story of the first game. So it'll be just an inversion of the first two titles. But yes, in any case Werewolf III will be written as Chronicles III. It would be confusing if we start having different numbers... Thanks, Katz! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Celes Crusader Posted March 7, 2004 Report Share Posted March 7, 2004 *Hugs Tanny* These Chronicles are really a great read. I like how you make the action flowing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katzaniel Posted March 7, 2004 Report Share Posted March 7, 2004 These continue to be great reads. As for this last one, though, out of context of the whole voting system, it seems very unlikely. You put it down very closely to what actually happened, but I think the part about Iron Chef's death comes across poorly. ie) They all say they think he's guilty because he won't speak. He refuses to speak. They agree that he must be guilty. Iago asks him to show why he will not speak, and he finally does. They all say, "oh, okay then." He cooks them dinner and then kills himself. I think there's a few things that might improve it: * You could add a little dialogue with people saying that they still think he's guilty. * You could move the part where he finally opens his mouth, in lieu of having Mizuhara ask him to, maybe in his last moment, just as he's dying, he opens it and that's when Iago notices the lack of tongue and comments. * Or maybe just before or just after Mizuhara makes that last request and Iron Chef acknowleges, Mizuhara pronounces that the guilt is obvious through lack of trying to communicate and no evidence could show otherwise. Just something to explain why he still has to die after he's shown the reason for his silence... Hope this helps. I am really enjoying the product of your efforts Tanuchan. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanuchan Posted March 7, 2004 Report Share Posted March 7, 2004 (edited) Hmm... yes, I think you're right. I did it last night and I was a bit tired, and today post it without a proper re-read. I'll edit it before I put on the next night phase Thanks, Katz! Edit: Okay, rewrote the last bit. The explanation for the silence will come with the night phase post. Hope it got better... really, RedChef's death was the most unlikely one. Edited March 7, 2004 by Tanuchan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Celes Crusader Posted March 7, 2004 Report Share Posted March 7, 2004 Tanny: I've noticed something: Yumi did cast her vote against the Iron Chef. But I must admit that this is one of the messiest day of the RPed chronicle. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tanuchan Posted March 7, 2004 Report Share Posted March 7, 2004 Tanny: I've noticed something: Yumi did cast her vote against the Iron Chef. But I must admit that this is one of the messiest day of the RPed chronicle. Yeah, I know she, and everybody else, confirmed the votes later. So most of players had two voting posts. As it was really a messy day, I opted to use just one of the wordings of the voting posts. I used the one Yumi gave him chance to speak, and I considered that, as he didn't answer, you did keep your vote. I hope you don't mind too much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katzaniel Posted March 7, 2004 Report Share Posted March 7, 2004 Yes, it's not exactly easy to explain his death in a strictly roleplaying context. You're doing the story credit with these, and that edit made it a lot more logical. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lady Celes Crusader Posted March 7, 2004 Report Share Posted March 7, 2004 That's good then Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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