Appy

*Appy applauds* I like this a lot! Welcom to the board, you come well-directed I see

A very good first attempt Wylde, already picturing an image in my head tells me you certainly have potential.. but I also like Alaeha's suggestion, if only just for letting it flow more, so the image won't shatter.. am I making sense? Probably not lol Aye, that's me at the moment! I hate it! lol *nod* that's why I am still here.. *hugs Wylde* Welcom to the boards! I hope your stay here wil be as pleasant as mine so far

supurb! I read it twice just because I love the flow.. great work

*Appy blushes a bit and then bows* Many thanks for your comment, and you are most welcom to 'use' that line, Peredhil, It'd be my honour even *hoping she didn't make a fool of herself again this time Appy walks off mumbling* mumble all these ppl mumble commenting mumble I hate compliments mumble glad there weren't only that mumble mumble...

*Appy applauds* Very nice work.. well done! Maybe leave out the "the" in "When the signs have died" ? For flow you see... although on second thought.. nawww forget that comment. I like it Everyone should have that kindof lighthouse

Happy birthday!

Re-reading it I can see how it can work confusing for those not familiar with the terms The Way and paths.. at least not in the way I used them there. They have a divine origin, maybe that helps?

undergrowth in a forest.. now there's an image that I didn't couple with this one yet.. I like it Thanks for all comments.. I'm leaving it as it is, since that's how I felt at that moment. I can see your point Loki.. but the "stretching it" feeling is part of the poem

something that i heard today and that really upset me, that is part of this i guess.. In america 27 (!) children die each day because of mishandling and abuse from parents. In germany 2 (still !) die that way each day.. bringing germany on 3rd place, but in the same league as most european countries. disturbing to have it told like that...they actually used the word league

~I woke up with this in my head, some ppl might find this difficult to read, for that, my apologies... I present to you the tiniest story I've come up with so far ~ ***************************** ......."Why do you do that?" she said suddenly "Why do I do what?" he replied, while stirring the milk through his third cup of coffee "You mean joking around a lot?" ......."Yes, you know as well as I do that clowns are often sad on the inside.. don't you think other people will know?" "Perhaps I am not that kind of clown, sister. Consider that" .......She laughed, crystal clear but honing. "You honestly think I don't know you brother-dear?" She pushed her spoon around the base of her cup, sending it tinkling along the edge of the art-deco saucer. "I just often wonder what would happen if you wouldn't act that way" she looked in his eyes "Would you have raped me?" .......He leaned forward. Opened his mouth and two letters almost became visible, hovering above the ashtray that was inbetween them "NO" .......There they were, 2 super-powers, brought forth at the same time. They had shared the same womb and a lot more. And now the world held it's breath. ......."Would you still hold me dear and tender if you would stop joking around brother?" The world swivelled it's eyes from one to the other, little drops of sweat forming on it's forehead. .......For a full five minutes she stared into his eyes. He let her. 'See little sister, see that I am not, what you think I could be. Your mother made sure little sister..you mother made sure.' .......The world wiped it's forehead and started breathing again. Like a Virgin from Madonna was still playing in the background, the bus at the busstop closed it's doors noisily. At the bar someone was laughing. She smiled her special smile and sipped at her coffee. .......She knew.

~Would you believe me if I told you I woke up with a little story in my head with about the same topic, the twisted youth thing?~ I thought this was a very good read.. I only tended to not like the double use of "wake" in the 4th stanza.. but that's just me not wanting to use the same word-type/sound in the same stanza I guess. If its the only stanza in the poem that has that anyways. (don't quote me on this, i'm sure i did it too somewhere ) Well done

Eeep! *runs* I said you could keep going! I said I said I said... waaaaaa

Finally I got my brain to register what I read here, (for some reason i have a hard time reading poems) and I love it. Simple, logical (to me) deeply philosophical. You wrote part of what I think of as the truth. Will you stop writing what's in my mind! *laughs* Naw keep it going, it's funny to see loose thoughts/feelings in writing this clear. Good luck and all that anyways PS: I too wanna be able to paint the pictures in my head.. *sigh*

neat lil thing this *applauds* I like it

*Appy applauds* I really like this style of writing, not sure how you would revise this, but it seems already to capture the core... Ugh i'm horrible at commenting lol, I'll stick with just really liking this, and looking forward to more

~ I liked the "You are Incomplete" too much to get rid of it, and the "You are Boring" needed to close it (it's about writer's block afterall, as reverie pointed out here ) So tadaa, new stanza forced it's way in ~ The world is White It looks at me and says: "You are Empty" and I agree I've always despised White.. The world is Darkness It looks at me and says: "You are Nothing" and I agree I've always feared Darkness.. The world is Twilit It looks at me and says: "You are Incomplete" and I agree I've always shunned The Grey.. The world is a Mirror It looks at me and says: "You are Boring" and I agree I've never liked Me..

Thank you!

*Appy walks in and hugtackles Louvetau, get's up, and dissapears in a corner without uttering a word* OOC: eya! (I could never shut up lol)

Tendrils of self reaching out touching searching looking for those meant to do the same The feeling of linking the way showing our paths humanity's destiny Union pictures of going up in energy joining All ..emotions do strange things to one's perception.. [15 september 2003, Leverkusen]

Thats ok, Merelas, I'm sometimes lost on these boards aswell still Thanks for your kind words

*Appy applauds* I like this, the concept is great, first of all, and this reading like a story, with that ending.. yes, Appy likes My favo two lines: Fate is a cruel puppeteer The strings are always tangled So true..

~Now that i'm finally kinda happy with the translation I figured I'd post this one in this thread aswell, seeing as it is also originally in dutch and was written in 1996. The stanza with the "" is the refrain(sp?) of a song by a band that helped me tons in those days, they made me write down my thoughts, since their own lyrics so much resembled poems on their own. Enjoy ~ Again And I'm so tired already Trains thunder through my head each carriage filled with thoughts "Fleeing from Yesterday Repressed by Today Caught in Tomorrow" The world below me is a turning globe The world above me is one big nothing The world around me does not make me feel It doesn't exist anymore Only I am left Alone.. with too many people around me Original: Opnieuw En ik ben al zo moe treinen denderen door m'n hoofd elke wagon gevuld met gedachten "Voor gister op de vlucht door vandaag teneer gedrukt in morgen gevangen" De wereld onder mij is een draaiende bol De wereld boven mij is één groot niets De wereld om mij heen doet me helemaal niks hij bestaat niet meer Alleen ik ben er nog Alleen... met te veel mensen om me heen ~edited, I crashed while posting this, and my revisions were gone.. I only realised that after posting. The line "does not make me feel" isn't the original, revised line, but for now it will do *sighs and kicks her computer several times*~

No role-playing from me, but a big Happy Birthday all the same!

It was the sole truth Loki

~another posting like it is, not sure if I'm happy with it yet, but it has the general feel to it that I was aiming for.. I guess ~ Old Love So many years of sharing struggling of trying to cope with growing up Something wrong can't put my finger on it but it's there lurking destroying all hope Emotions surging not getting through different wavelenght or non at all? I do not know non does for sure Speculations secret converstations discussing my love Apathetic Autistic words that fall and hit me hard One year of fighting of trying to excape the inevitable joined conclusion love has fled could not help us anymore Confusion Unwilling to let go of known certainties that kept us together but then relieve sets in boundries falling All is well ~corrected a spelling error~ ~more editing, for the sake of flow.. I wrote this for my ex-boyfriend, inspired because my parents both saw him last week, and it seemed he was doing well, well for someone in his position anyways.. It's hard to quit a 4 year long relationship on the sole base of both not being in love anymore, still being close friends afterwards and then some months later loose contact and several months more after that hear that he's sitting at his parents house living from money from the state, without them forcing him to find a job.. because he's proclaimed depressed by several doctors... just so you know where it comes from, I need a hug now ~