Valdar and Astralis

The writing exchange has begun! Go nuts

Closing Entries, expect the complete circle within the next day or two! email me as soon as possible if you somehow got ommited.

Gwai-yes you finished yours, check out the Library thread for the first WEP

Leif, Firstly, welcome to the pen The thing I really like about your work is the simplicity and cohesivness of your sentences. This is something I'm having quite a bit of trouble with, and need to yell at myself, STOP! every minuite or two in order to create a coherant sentance. See? I'm doing it again. While I think (as HappyBudda mentioned) your stories could use a little more fleshing out, your straightforward and simple style has a charm of it's own that I find very appealing (*applies full brakes to the sentence!!*). One suggestion I can make to improve on this would be to think of the observer's viewpoint as a camera. Right now, you're recording events from about ~5 metres away. Try to push forward to 3, and see if that helps. *Little Valdar bounces around the Bunny excitedly, gesturing in earspeak*

Extending deadline by 3 days! BumpBump! NudgeNudge!

Congrats promotees!

Katz, Very well written piece-Like Gyrfalcon, I was a bit suprised at the ending (either). One question though-if humanity at that time was sufficantly advanced to transverse the bounds of space and time, would it not be plausible that humanity had abandoned earth? Giving poor Gaea some time off for a few millenia, say. Level the cities and mountains, and cart everything off to the nearest habitable planet. After all, it was mentioned that their spaceship travelled to the edge of the universe, and teleported beyond. Technology would have progressed since then unless the Apocalypse occured right after they left. For all we know, the poor explorers missed the great return by mere years. Just a thought

"Dora Dull and not so nice, Give the food then give advice. . .Dora Dull and not so nice, Give the food then give advice. . .Dora dull and. . ." A vast sea of chanting echoed through the corridors, and 484827894897 vacant eyed Dora Cultists moan their way through the Pen Keep.

A band of freeflying Metalhead Hooners drive by Vinne and Melvin's ghosts (they're dead right?). The earth shakes in rhythm with their head bangs, singing- LEATHER CLAD, KILLER MOLLUSC! LEATHER CLAD, KILLER MOLLUSC! LEATHER CLAD, KILLER MOLLUSC! FROM TEH STARRRRRRRRRRSS! Vinne sighed.

Katz-yes, please do email me It's easier to track.

The second, Pen is Mightier than the Sword, Writing exchange program. 27/9/2004 The ring has been formed. Please contact me as soon as possible if you wish to change anything THE RING HAS BEEN FORMED! Due date: 1st November LIST OF PARTICIPANTS ..........Tanuchan ...... Orlan ...........Gwai............ Katzaniel ......Wrenwind .............. Alaeha .....cryptomancer ...... Peredhil ........Wyvern ......... Vanessa ...........Valdar .... Gyrfalcon As per the First Writing Exchange. . . 1) Writing Type-Any. You may write a story about a person, with a person, even AS a person. It may not have to be a story, it could be a poem, or freestyle, even. This project is due to run for weeks, if not months. The aim here is to capture the essence of your victi. . .er, subject as closeley as possible. You may, and in fact, are encouraged to speak with your subjects, to clarify details and the like. 2) Organization-Circular closed. The idea behind this, is not to have a free-for-all orgy of stories flying twenty ways at once, with 40 people writing about a single person, 15 on another, and one left all alone. I propose, instead, to do it as so: .........A-->B ......../........\ .......F.........C ........\......../ .........E<--D Where one person gets to write about one other person, who will write about one other person and so on, until the first person is written about. 3) The e-mail adress for participants to email their interests to is valdarsh@hotmail.com. You may choose who you wish to write about, but for the sake of ease of formability, please make this list as flexible as possible. We will try to the best of our abilities to accomadate everyone. If anything arises, we will e-mail you directly. 4) The ring will be formed, on the 23rd of September. The submission date will be 23rd October, so you will have one month to stir up something. 5) Please keep your entries to yourself until the submission date so that we wont have entries dripping all over the caberet room. . .poor Waterlily will have to clean them up, and cleaning makes it slury. Slury hentai plants aren't good, are they? 6) PLEASE NOTE!! If you have previously participated in the Writing Exchange Program but have not submitted your piece, you may not participate in this one. If you complete your piece from last year before the sign up ends, you may re-participate, otherwise need to wait a year. Sorry

It moved, turning its gaze towards them. Even through the door the heroes could feel its overpowering malevolence, and shifted uneasily. Valdar calmly studied the lines of magic surrounding the Abysmal creature. The demon stared back insolently. Unable to penetrate his mask of illusion, all it saw was a mortal ranger and minor Angel, neither worthy of the briefest attention. Though he had never battled one before, Valdar knew he could have easily destroyed the demon with a single mind freezing blow. To do so however, would alert every demon in the pits of his presence. "I WILL ENJOY RENDING YOUR BONES WHILE YOU WATCH MORTAL, AND YOUR WINGED LADY-OH YES, I WILL HAVE FUN WITH HER. I SHALL. . ." Images invaded his mind, gruesome and lewd. Valdar calmly broke contact, leaving the demon to rant in an empty part of his brain. Kitanue was less successful, and blushed. "That reminds me. How did you intend to get us to the chamber of the Grail? You realize I cannot force a way through the pits." "Huh? Oh. We're not going through the pits- She half turned back to the door. "Never mind what it's saying. How are we getting in then?" "Sorry. After the heroes leave, we will break the seal to create a diversion then-" "Kitty!" "He's distracting me! We will be entering Hellwind through one of the lava vents. If we find the right one, it's but a short run to the chamber." "So this is all a diversion?" "Yes." * The door burst open in splinters. Heroes charged forth into the unlit chamber as planned, and faltered involuntarily in the engulfing darkness around them. The spellcasters entered last with flickering eyes trying to pierce the shadow and failing. A chill gust dimmed the torches, and the heroes gripped their swords tighter. Then a flicker of movement in the darkness, uncoiling with unnatural fluidness. "HAIL, ANGEL. COME TO JOIN YOUR FRIEND AT LAST? VERY SNEAKY OF YOU TO PLAY DEAD WHILE I SQUEEZED THE LIFE FROM THE OTHER. . .WHAT WAS HER NAME AGAIN?" "That. . .voice. I should have guessed. Show yourself, demon-I tire of playing games." The shadow laughed malevolently. Two points of red light appeared in the black cloud beneath a single flame. The glowing eyes leered at the Angel, and the flame twisted into the shape of a burning crown. Cracks appeared in the shadow, revealing the hidden inferno and giving the darkness a shape. The shadows behind the demon melted and fell away as the wings exploded into fire, dispelling the darkness and bathing the chamber in a hellish glow. The Balrog rose to its full height in a cloud of vaporized shadow. In its hand was an enormous black sword, easily half the demon's height. The mere heat pulsing from its skin of lava made the heroes take a step back. The first line of heroes charged, shields raised against the tremendous heat. Icy lances flew through the air, evaporating into clouds of vapour. Before they could reach the demon, the black blade screamed through the air and cut down the charge in a single blow. The second rank was thrown into the air from the impact. Spinning with inhuman speed, the Balrog smashed an unseen team of Assassins, and laughed. "FOOL MORTALS! SOON ALL YOUR SOULS WILL BE MINE!" The Balrog shouted something in a demonic tongue, and Valdar felt a wild rush of dark magic surge through the room. To his horror, the corpses of the newly fallen twitched and moaned. The Balrog charged forward, smashing another assault with it's foul blade. With wild fear in their eyes, the attack faltered, and fell back. With a few more swipes of its blade, the demon turned the retreat into a rout. Screaming heroes tried to claw their way over petrified spellcasters. Valdar loosed another arrow and turned to Kitanue helplessly. Kitanue shouted something in the language of high Angels and charged. She flew directly into the rampaging Balrog, her Katana slicing deep into burning flesh. The Hellspawn turned to face the new attack, and Kitanue was driven back blow by blow, dodging or blocking with inhuman speed. She struck again in a spray of demon blood. The demon roared in triumph, seeing the angel overextended. It struck in one fell blow, cleaving halfway through Kitanue's body. Instead of blood there was a flash of light. The angel fell limply off the demon's blade, in a blaze of fire. "Kitanue, NO!"

Valdar very carefully stepped away from the puddle of acidic drool. Above him, the vacant eyed demon snorted, releasing a small cloud of noxious gas. As he looked up a small gnome waved apologetically, and jerked the creature by the horns to one side. Three of the four enchanters had charmed a demon by now. There was a yelp behind him, followed by a roar. The elf spun around to see another gnome scampering away from his out of control Hellhound. The beast shook its head in confusion, straining against it's spectral bonds. Pausing only to recall the crude spell, Valdar summoned a mass of vines from the earth that seized the demon's feet. Rooted, it fell over with a crash. The enchanter stopped a safe distance away and re-wove his word of command. There was a hollow roar as the demon footsoldier, a full twelve feet tall charged down on them. Valdar drew his corrupted blade, but was waved back by the high elf. "This one is mine! Agh`zagchbo-niilten, I command you!" The demon footsoldier blinked and stopped in its tracks. The other enchanters looked at the high elf with respect. There were not many who could bind by mere force of name. The demon dropped its head low to sniff at it's new master, releasing a small cloud of caustic vapour with each breath. It smiled. "Actually, it's Agh`zagchbo-miilten" The enchanter did not have time to comprehend this before exploding in a shower of gore. Valdar's unholy blade howled through the air, slicing open the demon's thigh. The beast roared in pain as chilling torment pierced into its veins. It rounded on him in anger, and the elf barley dodged a cleaving blow that shattered the flagstones. The ground exploded in a shower of dust and stone. Valdar rolled into a kneeling position and drove his sword through the demon's kneecap. Ignoring the pain, the demon raised it's cleaver again. Suddenly it staggered forward and dropped its weapon. The elf scrambled out of the way as it crashed into the ground, with two snarling hellhounds tearing bloody chunks from its back. There was another bellow of pain in the distance, fading into a gurgling sigh. Two clerics ran over from the main body of heroes, and shook their heads at the red stain on the ground. They were down to three enchanters now. Rejoining the main force, the company advanced inexorably. With the bulk of their army destroyed at the gates, and their defences overrun, the greater demons of Hellwind retreated through the dim corridors. The heroes followed. Finally, they stopped before a great door. Magical boxes and backpacks bulging with plunder were reluctantly set to the ground. The spellcasters looked around nervously, sensing the energy signature but not recognizing it. Valdar and Kitanue shared a grim glance. Both perceived how the laylines of malevolence joined, recognized the powerful nexus of evil powering the Balrog.

Lord, We ask that our plot never vanish from sight, Grammar, punctuation ever be right, Sentence and structure always be tight, While our heroes and villains continue to fight. May words that we chose to be sober Abet in our reader an abject horror And if our chosen subject is light, Incite in the seer sheer mental delight Finally lord if it's your will Help this dear writer over the hill May our flow of words never be blocked And the dam in our minds ever unlocked Amen.

Edited, for publishing in uni magazine. It reads more fluidly to me now though block 3 and 4 seem a little repetative: Reign of the Godslayer-1.2 Old man sits on a hill yonder Young man strides on the plain under Sky god cried then, behold thunder Young man fell to the earth sundered Widow cried to the old mother Mother cried to the earth father Father smote down the old sky king Smashed from heaven amidst lightning Sky king rose from the shattered land Full of wrath did he clench his hand Back and forth did they throw their anger Neither cared that the world broke under King and father battled locked in rage Over this world for many an age Now old man watched the young world die None but he knew, first tale as lie Fire rain and the mountains heave Burnt black birds falling from the trees People died and the mountains bared Old one smiled for his time was there. From the dawn came a new rider Strike both god down and world plunder *** Old world spins on the new frontier But dead earth where the clouds make clear.

With the gates demolished, the path to Hellwind Fortress lay open. Grim faced heroes marched down the narrow ravine with Kitanue in the lead. A funeral pyre burned behind them, staining the cloudless sky with plumes of black smoke and bearing away the sound of mournful dirges with them. The air grew thick with the smell of sulphur and brimstone as they descended. They encountered little resistance, mainly disorganized demons that fled the carnage on the walls. Eight imps and a bunch of hounds around the corner. Remind me again why I'm doing this? You're the only "ranger" left, Valdar. And your little trick at the gates has the spellcasters curious. You wont want to end up apprenticed to an enchanter, would you? A mental shiver passed between them. From around the bend, Valdar whistled a shrill off-key note that only vaguely reassembled a bird cry. The heroes halted and several assassins ran forward, fading into the shadows as they did. A long moment later, the air was filled with screams as the Assassins infiltrated their lines and butchered the ambush. Silence followed, and Valdar gave a loud quack signalling the all clear. Around mid afternoon, the company reached the end of the ravine. Carved into the granite walls before them were the black doors of Hellwind. The surface was deeply etched with demonic runes of strengthening and weight that burned darkly through Valdar's voidsight, obscuring anything that lay beyond. A gibbet stood on one side from which hung a decayed corpse in torn blue robes. A few strands of dark hair still clung to the eyeless head. Kitanue glanced at Valdar, who nodded grimly. The heroes rested briefly before commencing the assault on the door. A few arrows fell their way, none finding a mark. Heroes ran forward and responded with a rain of bowfire, sweeping demon footsoldiers from the balcony. Necromantic spellfire struck the door, dispelling the wards while a team of rogues undid the complex lock. Kitanue ordered the heroes back, leaving only a skirmish line in front. The rogues completed the job and the doors ground open reluctantly. A shrieking challenge issued from within, releasing a pack of snarling Hellhounds. The rhino sized demons surged forward in a wake of fire and smoke, driven by masked hunters. An avalanche of spellfire met them, freezing the hearts of a third. Icy lances ricoched off thick hides and exploded in a shower of razor sharp fragments. Caught between whips and ice, the hounds reeled madly and turned on their own masters. The counterattack turned into a rout quickly. Valdar stood on his tiptoes trying to see over the armoured shoulder in front him. His short stature was not helping him keep track of the battle, voidsight and sixth sense obscured by the chaotic mana flux. The elf gave up and planted a foot on the ogre's knee guard. The hero did not seem to notice. Valdar had a brief view of the doorway until Kitanue shouted a command from the front. The ogre roared and charged, sending the Planewalker tumbling into the dirt. "Ha ha! Ranger down!" Valdar lifted his head from the dirt, burning eyes masked by illusion. The halfling that had made the comment snickered and sauntered off in the direction of the doorway. The elf pried himself off the ground and carefully looked around. Most of the spellcasters had vanished into the fortress already. A few arrows fell harmlessly from the balcony. Valdar very carefully focused a tiny pulse of magic into his legs, and took careful aim. The halfling sailed over the balcony. There was the sound of a brief scuffle, and a scream. Then it was silent. The elf dusted himself off and strode into the dim passageway. What was that? Kitanue asked worriedly. Nothing. Satisfied, Valdar dusted himself off and strode into the dim passageway.

Somewhere, somehow, a 2000 ton Mollusc named Chtulu was abruptly displaced from it's eternal slumber, and flopped unceremoniously on Tamaranis. Meanwhile. . .

OH neat, one of the banner ads has a woman speaking, and her eyes follow your mouse movements.

... The battle had been won at terrible cost. Well over half the heroes had been slain, most beyond mortal resurrection. The number of survivors had grown during the night as lingering spirits were reunited with their bodies. The undead retreated as dawn burst over the mountains, howling in pain as they ran for the shadows. Feeling wetness on her breast, Kitanue woke to find Valdar missing. Instead, a Barbarian had leaned over his empty space and drooled all over her. She pushed the snoring man away and rose. His head immediately fell into the lap of the Magician beside her. She flexed her wings a few times to work out the kinks and looked around. Valdar was nowhere to be seen. There was a small trail of blood leading away from the sleeping heroes. Pulling a dagger from under her wing, the angel followed the trail behind a fallen tree, and blinked in surprise. Still snoring soundly, Valdar lay naked in the dirt. His illusion was still intact although his clothes had been torn away. Kitanue leaned closer, and noticed his ears were covered in small bite marks. Similar marks appeared on his shoulder, and his lips adorned with red smudges. The Angel rubbed her eyes to make sure she was awake, and gently nudged the sleeping elf. "Valdar?" she whispered. "mmngh, nosso hard. . ." She nudged him harder. Instead, he turned on his side and curled into a ball, revealing unmistakable scratch marks on his back. He groaned. This time, Kitanue took him by the shoulders and shook the elf. "Wake up!" "Mrrgshinwuzzat?" "Your clothes are torn. You're covered in lipstick and scratch marks, and I didn't make them" Valdar's eyes flew open in surprise, and brought a hand to his lips. Kitanue rolled the elf over despite his protests and examined the scratches on his back carefully. She placed a hand over the marks, closing her fingers until they covered them, and made an experimental raking gesture. These are love marks, or I'm an imp. What? She took a deep, patient breath before continuing. You weren't at the camp when I woke up. There was a trail of blood leading to you, and it's not your blood. Something took you in the night and made love to you. I dont remember anything! he protested. It couldn't have been a succubus-I would have known and so would you Just then, there was a blood curdling scream from the campsite. Kitanue and Valdar looked up in suprise. Get dressed She ordered before standing and running for the camp. The heroes were staring at the Barbarian who had been leaning on Kitanue for most of the night. In turn, he was staring at the magician with a look of utmost horror. She demurely adjusted her dress, and walked away. His haunted eyes followed her every step. Kitanue stopped beside the berserker. "What's wrong?" He said nothing for a long moment, before tearing his eyes away. <edit>: Due to several time constraints, Shiny will be continued next week-apolagies for the two rushed posts. I had to get them out of my system, or suffer less-than-two-posts-a-week concience attacks \^_^/ </edit>

"Why not?" The Turtle asked, before stamping an enourmous "WEENIE AWARDEE" stamp on the penguin. The creature flew apart in a shower of Molluscs

interlude Shadow stirred in the night. No watch was kept, for indeed there was no need. A few leftover ghouls lurched in the darkness beyond the sanctuary, too weak and too few to penetrate the wards. Too tired to enter even the lightest of trances, Valdar snored softly with his head resting on Kitanue's shoulder. The angel snored back in counterpoint, resting in turn on a heavily made up magician. A chill wind blew through the camp, bearing scents of otherworldly carnage and death. Heroes stirred uncomfortably in their sleep and swords were fingered. The fire faltered under the unnatural breeze, and died. In the darkness, three shadows moved. "What is this, sister? This is not Angztbaa" "Are we lost, sister?" "No." "Why are we at Hellwind, sister? We are far off course" "Why do you think, sisters? I am bored of the little games you play in the sky." The right most shadow moved towards the sleeping elf, revealing a naked elf. The other two followed. "Wars are-" "Wars are boring. The two of you have dragged me around, visiting your ugly pawns and cold castles. It's been too long. Far too long. Yesss. . ." The slightly transparent woman kneeled before Valdar. Her ears twitched in a predatory manner. "This one is not useful, sister. It is far too young. Perhaps when it is grown you may use it as your pawn. Come now." "This is boring, sisters. Let us go to Angztbaa-chaos is due for a minor victory." Instead, the naked elf flickered, and turned solid. She hissed, and ran a long bloodstained fingernail down the Planewalker's cheek. The other two drew back in panic. "Aie! You step into the flow of casualty. Pull back, sister before it is too late!" "What are you doing, sister?!" The elf pulled Valdar forward, tearing his void mail open. She licked her blood red lips and stroked his ear with her own. "MY turn for fun, sister" ***

\O_o/ Yeah. . .wow. Best wishes and prayers to the parents, sounds like they'll need it.

Thanks for the feedback, you two. The next section of Shiny is finished now-the battle for the gates. Personally, I found it a little drawn out, and lacking in any real event. Does anyone else feel this way? Also, the final post felt slightly rushed. The reason being, I felt myself getting stuck in a bog. I could continue the fairly pointless fighting, and it was starting to get boring, writing-wise. Several events I wanted to include in the battle at the gates actually got ommited accidentally, as they involved spellcasters, so pardon the lack of humor in the past few posts! How did you find it? boring? entrancing? overdone? Also still looking for any feedback on "new" writing style Thanks again, -Valdar

Valdar! We are here. The Angel looked up with tired eyes. Less than two hundred paces away, Valdar waved. Twenty spellcasters were arrayed behind him, druids, sorcerers and priests ready spells waiting for his word of command. The ghoul army lurched forward, demolishing what was left of the gates. No shambling zombie army this was. Animated with malicious skill, each contained the twisted fragment of a slain hero. They leaped forward with inhuman dexterity and skill. The unprepared assault faltered under the weight of savage undead. Six warriors died immediately, and the others fell back. Valdar issued a word of command, and a wave of anti undead spells crushed the first ranks of ghouls. Kitanue glanced over the walls at the surging army within. There were at least two thousand. More spells hit the gate, bathing the walls in a holy light. Her illusion crumbled under the divine illumination and turned to mist, while the undead burned under celestial fire. Still they rushed forward mindlessly, some clearing the focus area and running towards the spellcasters. "Fall back! Defend the magicians!" The angel spread her wings and rose majestically from the walls. Her blood soaked wings and armour blazed a brilliant white beneath the divine illumination. She swooped in and cut down a group of ghouls threatening the spellcasters. Circling around, she brought herself to hover above the heads of the fleeing survivors. "Stand your ground! The dead must not pass!" Emboldened by her radiant aura, the heroes turned to face the forces of Hell. The Angel landed in their midst to organise a skirmish line. The heroes spread out, and were quickly reinforced by those returning from the wall. Spell after spell fell onto the gates of Hellwind. Flaming hammers fell from the heavens, and celestial lances pierced the endless ranks. Hungry earth opened, claimed the dead as it's own. The stink of battle was soon replaced by the reek of burning mana. In the confusion, Valdar sneaked in a spell or two of his own. Burning clouds filled gaps in spellfire, turning undead into ash as they tried to break out of the focus. His disguise sagged under the intense mana fluctuations. Here and there, patches of multihued chain mail showed through the dull green disguise. Still he held on, willing the disguise to remain, knowing a break would reveal his presence to every demon in the pits. * An eternity passed. Sporadic spellfire lit up the red sky filled with ash and dust. The gates of Hellwind had been reduced to molten rubble. Plumes of smoke rose from the remains, and parts of the ruin still glowed. Valdar sat down heavily on a rock. He ignored the odd look some of the Wizards were giving him- A ranger who could open portals and invoke drifting fire. They wondered if the world had gone mad. Valdar didn't care. No demon stampede had been forthcoming. The illusion had held. He heard a soft flutter of wings, and Kitanue landed by his side. The Angel's face was a mask of exhaustion. "That's the last of them. The way to the upper levels is clear." "There's more?" She shook her head and was silent a long moment, as though gathering the energy to speak. Your Barlog is probably up there. Upper Hellwind is usually empty a few days before reinforcements arrive from the Abyss. "Perhaps a hundred or two footsoldiers remain. Nothing we cannot handle in the morning." She gestured emptily around them, where less than twenty heroes and eight spellcasters lay in exhausted slumber.

*GROSS ALERT* Actually, on the day I had that, it was blood and phlegm. Had a cough. I but picked at lunch. *GROSS ALERT END*