Savannah

Oh YAY! Congrats to you!!! I would offer to help, but I really am lousy at painting and worse at papering. I can change lightbulbs and that is about it. I can however say YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1. If you're too open-minded, your brains will fall out. 2. Don't worry about what people think; they don't do it very often. 3. Going to a church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car. 4. It isn't the jeans that make your butt look fat. 5. Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity. 6. My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance. 7. Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious. 8. It is easier to get forgiveness than permission. 9. For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program. 10. If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip. 11. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks. 12. A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel good. 13. Eat well, stay fit, die anyway. (Just remember how lucky you were to get a free trip around the sun.)

*giggles* You guys are nuts!!!!!!!!!!!!! And so too show how much I 'preciate ya I leave you all happy valentine thingys. THESE ARE ENTRIES TO A WASHINGTON POST COMPETITION ASKING FOR A RHYME WITH THE MOST ROMANTIC FIRST LINE BUT THE LEAST ROMANTIC SECOND LINE: Love may be beautiful, love may be bliss But I only slept with you, because I was pissed. ************************* I thought that I could love no other Until, that is, I met your brother. ************************** Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you. But the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl's empty and so is your head. Of loving beauty you float with grace If only you could hide your face. *************************** Kind, intelligent, loving and hot This describes everything you are not. ****************************** I want to feel your sweet embrace But don't take that paper bag off of your face. ******************************* I love your smile, your face, and your eyes Damn, I'm good at telling lies! ************************************ My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife: Marrying you screwed up my life. ************************************ I see your face when I am dreaming. That's why I always wake up screaming. *************************************** My love, you take my breath away. What have you stepped in to smell this way? **************************************** My feelings for you no words can tell Except for maybe "Go To Hell".

Happy Birthday even later!

Forgiveness is not something you do for someone else. It is what you do for you to keep from being eaten alive by anger and hate. Keeping that inside will cause you more harm than anything that anyone can do to you. That does not mean you will ever forget the wrongs that were done. It is however far easier to forgive someone else than it is to forgive yourself. Knowing you have caused someone near and dear great pain is the worst feeling in the world. You may can sew the stuffing back into a teddy bear-can you ever replace the tears which fall?

Arwen: Nobody will believe in you unless you believe in yourself. Liberace (1919 - 1987) Look how he turned out!! Everyone above is right-Believe you deserve the happiness you have. Cling to that thought. When something goes awry-don't decide it is the beginning of a tumble down the stairs. Simply sidestep the problem and move on.

In Italy for thirty years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, bloodshed - they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance. In Switzerland they had brotherly love, fire hundred years of democracy and peace and what did that produce…? The cuckoo clock. The Third Man, spoken by Orson Welles, Director

Spent all day Saturday watching it snow and Sunday it warmed up enough to melt away!!!!!!

Everyone should have a happy birthday!!! Hope it brings you lots of joy.

Its okay darlin. *smiles* You only trampled down some vines and I managed to repair the fence before the dragons came around. It is much more interesting to find something decent on an arrow. I hate Good luck or random.

A man absolutely hated his wife's cat and decided to get rid of him one day by driving 20 blocks from the house and leaving the cat at the park. As he was getting home, the cat was walking up the driveway. The next day he decided to drive the cat 40 blocks away. He let the beast out of the car and headed home. Driving back up his driveway, there was the cat! He kept taking the cat further and further, but the feline would always beat him home. At last, he decided to drive a few miles away, turn right, then left, cross the bridge, then right again, and make another right until he reached what he thought was a safe distance from his home and left the cat there. Hours later, the man calls home: "Jen, is the cat there?" "Yes," the wife answers, "why do you ask?" Frustrated, the man answers, "Put that SOB on the phone, I'm lost and need directions!"

A few words from the visionary Steven Wright:------ I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met. 3) Okay, so what's the speed of dark? 4) Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm. 5) When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane. 6) Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now. 7) Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film. Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark. 9) Many people quit looking for work when they find a job. 10) I intend to live forever-so far, so good. 13) When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded. 14) What happens if you get scared half to death, twice? 16) I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

Hey Enos Might I say that your poems look better in the banquet hall than flying thru the air? Altho I found it rather pleasant *smiles* Let go the light and fire's stove... Damn the dead and nature's grove... Mystic image shall bring the wrath, Phantasmal armies march your path! This is you?

I once had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue: "No good in a bed, but fine up against a wall". ~Eleanor Roosevelt Last week I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister . . . and now wish to withdraw that statement. ~Mark Twain The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and have the two as close together as possible. ~George Burns Santa Claus has the right idea . . . visit people only once a year. ~Victor Borge Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint. ~Mark Twain What would men be without women? Scarce, sir . . . mighty scarce. ~Mark Twain My wife is a sex object. Every time I ask for sex, she objects. ~Les Dawson By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. ~Socrates I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury. ~Groucho Marx

Happy Birthday Wrenwind!

Unit of Time: year Name of City: Little Rock Name of River: Tennessee Location: Produce Aisle in Krogers Adjective: sweet Plural noun: trees Verb ending in ing: driving Adjective: cool Type of Family relative: mama Noun: Monkey Plural Noun: trucks Name of street: Poplar Emotion: Anger Verb in past tense: walked 3 initials: DPE Type of animal: fish Plural noun: cages Junkfood: MilkyWay CandyBars Adjective: beautiful Liquid: Coke

Ah yes-and there is no research so it is not quiet as irritating to get thru the first week or so.

Happy Happy Joy Joy!! Hope today is/was/will be wonderful

Hmmm-I have watched The Ring about 45 times (it is my daughters favorite movie in the world -never would have guessed, huh?) and I still jump when she crawls out of that TV. Admittedly the actors do dumb stuff, but that is why we watch isn't it? So we can hide behind the couch and say NO Stupid-runnnnnnnnnnnn. She now wants the original version which is Japanese I think? Anyone know where I can get it? I need to be scared in a different language

I am-this is the second reset and its much better than the first one. Items work but the black market doesn't.

Wy-I think this sounds so fun-but I have a question. If you are doing this on Fridays-and you are starting after MLK on the 19th-wouldn't your first broadcast be the 23rd rather than the 26th which is Monday. I get so confused so easily!

Harvey's grandfather clock suddenly stops working right one day, so he loads it into his van and takes it to a clock repair shop. In the shop is a little old man who insists he is Swiss, and has a heavy German accent. He asks Harvey, "Vat sims to be ze problem?" Harvey says, "I'm not sure, but it doesn't go 'tick-tocktick -tock' anymore. Now it just goes 'tick...tick...tick.'" The old man says, "Mmm-Hm!" and steps behind the counter, where he rummages around a bit. He emerges with a huge flashlight and walks over the grandfather clock. He turns the flashlight on, and shines it directly into the clocks face. Then he says in a menacing voice, "Ve haf vays of making you tock!"

*smiles* This seems to be a good place for a history lesson The Legend of the Christmas Tree Angel Santa was very cross. It was Christmas Eve and nothing was going right. Mrs. Claus had burned all the cookies. The elves were complaining about not getting paid for the overtime they had worked making toys and were threatening to go on strike. The reindeer had been drinking eggnog all afternoon. To make matters worse, a few of the other elves had taken the sleigh out for a spin earlier in the day and had crashed it into a tree. Santa was furious. "I can't believe it! I've got to deliver millions of presents all over the world in just a few hours, and all of my reindeer are drunk, the elves are walking out, and I don't even have a Christmas tree! I sent that stupid little angel out hours ago to find a tree and he isn't even back yet! What am I going to do?" Just then, the little angel opened the front door and stepped in from the snowy night, dragging a Christmas tree. The angel said, "Yo, fat man! Where do you want me to stick the tree this year?" (We all know what he said) And thus the tradition of angels atop the Christmas trees came to pass...

Hugs to Tas-glad you are still alive. You are out of basic?

Just realized I had not contributed anything here in awhile-sorry I am but making up I will do -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You Know You've Had Too Much Holiday Cheer When.... 1. You notice your tie sticking out of your fly. 2. Someone uses your tongue for a coaster. 3. You start kissing the portraits on the wall. 4. You see your underwear hanging from the chandelier. 5. You have to hold on to the floor to keep from sliding off. 6. You strike a match and light your nose. 7. You take off your shoes and wade in the potato salad. 8. You hear someone say, "Call a priest!" 9. You hear a duck quacking and it's you. 10. You complain about the small bathroom after emerging from the closet. 11. You refill your glass from the fish bowl. 12. You tell everyone you have to go home... and the party's at your place. 13. You ask for another ice cube and put it in your pocket. 14. You yawn at the biggest bore in the room... and realize you're in front of the hall mirror. 15. You pick up a roll, and butter your watch. 16. You suggest everyone stand and sing the national budget. 18. You're at the dinner table and you ask the hostess to pass a bedpan. 19. You take out your handkerchief and blow your ear. 20. You tell your best joke to the rubber plant. 21. You realize you're the only one under the coffee table