Sorciere

not so much being alone for me, as lonliness. I love to be alone, but to be alone and know that there is no one to turn to if I need them, that is my biggest fear.

I found myself struggling through the first part, but that may be more because of my current predicament and mind not quite as sharp as it should be. I found the second part much easier to follow and this is my favourite bit, especially Having heard your original line for the altered part, I believe it is the better version and I wouldn't find it offensive, but I understand your caution. All in all an accurate picture of all that is going wrong with us and the world these days, I liked it

I love twists so much, great story!

Ohhhhhhhhhh Magic Roundabout!!! Bring back Zebedee! Nice poem btw too

You really should be a lyricist, I hear songs whenever I read your work, most impressive!

Wow, I can't think of anything else to say. Telling a story already established in another form and making it your own is so difficult and you accomplished it beautifully. One of the most wonderful things I have read in a long time.

You tackled a lot of harsh topics in one poem there. I found the flow a little off in parts, maybe it was just the way I read it, but I very much understood your running theme and it was a very hard bunch of issues to cope with, well done!

I think the structure of this poem lends perfectly to it's sentiment, your timing and expression are directly in line with the emotions of the theme, I love it, thank you for sharing!

Sure I remember you, you owe me $20. Of course it was you, what do you mean you don't know me? Geez the lengths some people will go to to avoid a payout Welcome back anyways

Deryn ran across the field with such haste that no one was quite sure what was happening until they looked to the east and saw the plume of smoke coming from the valley. The others followed quickly, Fadriana, Mydden and Sando, each of them abandoning their food and equipment, pausing only to gather their weapons. As they reached the edge of the small wood that harboured the village, Fadriana and Sando fell to their knees with great cries of woe, Mydden walked up to the tree that Deryn was leaning on and from behind his shoulder could see the devastation before them. Among quiet, restrained sobs Deryn whispered "They destroyed everything, everything." Mydden made for the village slowly, his sword in his hand hanging limply by his side, he had no use for it here. Everything was dead and the assailants had long gone. The whole village wiped out. Sando and Fadriana helped themselves up and started to follow, stumbling as they clumsily supported each other in their grief. Deryn stood unmoving, his sobbing now silent and his eyes fixed on a small area to the left of the town. "Mydden, they wait for you." he stated quietly but clearly. Mydden followed Deryn's eyes to the small cluster of trees just away from the burnt buildings, small movements could be seen amonst the foliage. "So they do, they are maybe not so feeble in their tracking after all" replied Mydden. He strode out from the ashes of the destroyed and directly towards the gathering of wizards. As he approached them, they slowly revealed themselves to him, showing no fear or unease. "You know why we are here Mydden" bellowed the tallest of the group who's robes hung around him in a purple swathe. He was clearly aged many years but his eyes were stern and unnerving and they never left Mydden's once. "It is your time now, you have evaded too long the path of your fate, no more will you run this land free and unburdened." "You killed a whole village in your search for me? Did you really need to shed such blood to prove your powers?" Mydden asked. "We do whatever it takes to reach the conclusion. you know that. It is why we are here, for the conclusion. They chose to protect you, for that they received their reward, glorious untimely death. The Wizard raised his right arm into the air clutching a gnarled wooden staff and began chanting, first quietly to himself, then louder and louder until he could be heard by all present. Mydden felt his whole body begin to shake, the chants rang through his bones like nothing he had felt before and his vision dimmed slowly as he felt himself being taken over by some unimaginable force. Visions of death and destruction flashed before him, women screaming, children running, men crying out for mercy as Dragons reigned over them and demons moved among them, bathing them in flame, ash and fury. Mydden could feel the heat of the moment, he could smell the burning flesh and all at once it was over. He recovered to discover himself on his knees in the grass and was surprised to feel his face wet from tears. The Wizard was stood directly over him now, his old rootlike hand resting on Mydden's head as if in comfort. There was no comfort here, for Mydden knew what was about to happen. Fadriana, Sando and Deryn stood by watching the scene with both shock and fear, knowing what was happening and also realising nothing they could do would stop this, intervention would only delay Mydden's death by mere minutes and bring about theirs maybe years before they would happen naturally. Mydden glanced to his friends and gave them a knowing look, a look of understanding and a look of thanks, for all the protection they had given him for the last twenty years and for not dragging out the conclusion. "By the Order of the Wizards of Bethanel, you are to receive the sentence of death, for crimes committed by your father one month before your birth. On that late summer night your father summoned up the demons from hell and reigned terror on this earth for seven sunsets, until all visible were dead. He then took his own life, retreating to hell to prevent the punishment that he so rightly deserved. In your death, his punishment will be served, you too will retreat to hell and the line of your family will be ended, preventing any further envokements of the damned to bring chaos and fury to this world. I bring you, to your conclusion!" The movement of the dagger in the Wizard's hand was so swift and silent that Fadriana and Sando hadn't quite realised what had happened, until they saw the blood silently run out of the corner of Mydden's mouth and his body slumped to the floor. Deryn turned away from the sight, his head in his hands, walking away to the north. "It is over." claimed the Wizard to his accompanying band of men "Let it be known that the sentence is served and the conclusion is reached." The group of Wizards turned away from the scene and returned in the direction from whence they came, leaving Sando, Fadriana and Deryn to stand over the body of their dead friend in despair. "His will lives on, he did not die, he will be reborn and the demons will reign again." spoke Fadriana softly to the other two as they stood by the hastily dug grave of Mydden at the village's edge. "How so?" a puzzled Sando asked. "He is dead, we cannot bring him back to life." "We have no need to bring him back to life." smiled Fadriana, "I have his seed inside me, the future is certain." Fadriana rubbed her small stomach and grinned at Deryn and Sando and they laughed out loudly as they walked away, knowing one day, the world would belong to the night again. *Spelling and grammatical erros excepted* hehe

I'm sure you'll find one, they hide in the weirdest of places.

I love this. It's something most people wouldn't write about, more often these days poems are about love, lost love or death and I too am a culprit of these themes, but it's so refreshing to see something off the track and so clearly expressed also, a pain often felt by many more than would admit to it I'm sure.

Quite a statement you have there! No worries about misunderstanding that one, well done!

A very nice collection! My favourite was the first one as I often find myself thinking along those lines when I am trying to write, even if I am trying to write 'cutesy', those darker lines try to invade. The rose is a very significant piece also and touches beautifully on the defiance among the depths, post more!

I really like this, but I found myself reading it as a song, not a poem, was that the intention? I hope so, because I feel this would be very effective in that medium.

Like Wren said, just a few little touch ups, but the sentiment is definitely there, well done Arwen

Very nice culmination, I liked it but wanted it to be longer for some reason, but I'm way too picky.

Such a flow, crafted beautifully and the words used just drag you further into it. Very well done, more than worth the time spent on it in my opinion.

*waves to Appy* Good luck hun, great to see you here!

*holds on to her day off like a kid holds on to it's lollipop* No, tomorrow will not come, I won't allow it!

Yay! *hands Parm an 'I'll promise to try and be good' sticker and pases him a beer. Welcome!

I love three liners, I remember in junior school (elementary in the US I think) our teacher trying to explain to us how to write a three liner adn us looking at him as if he was weird. We were all brought up to think poems had 4 lines per verse and every other line had to rhyme. He changed my view on a lot of things, but poetry was the main thing, he opened my eyes. I really liked this wren, it's structure lends itself to the subject matter, I don't think the feeling would be as full if it was written in another form.

Great challenge! This one was hard, but I loved having a go, ty! Natural Battle Fire feeds, a big relentless appetite that needs little persuasion Such an all consuming thing could not be good, no? Oh but yes, for all who see her marvel at the dances she performs And disappear with her movement in their own eyes. Lavish branches of lush, perfectly formed leaves willingly die for her Feeding themselves to her will for her to prosper Sacrificing themselves on her flames, to wither away in seconds After years of coaxing by Fire’s mother, the sun Even as she sleeps, fire still breathes a low breath, hidden from her hunters The cover of dark ash provides her place of rest None but very few can see her waiting here, for one more chance to feed While her cover seeps through earth to complete the ring Those envious of her beauty, try to quell her feeding from the earth They encompass her with their droplets of wet death But alone they too are consumed by her might, needing to form armies To even begin to challenge her strength and pow’r They call in aid from up above, sun’s own enemies turn on her child Relentlessly showering the struggling kin Her heart fights on, taking them each in turn, but so many start to fall A blanket of ice steals her final gasping breath

I really like this, it flows beautifully for me and is very deep, quite an insight, into myself.