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The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

Cerulean's Masquerade - A Party...


Peredhil

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Orlan

 

Lightning strikes, rain hails, and frogs rains from the sky, and sulfer plagues the crops. Signs of Doomsday? Is it the end of all life as we know it? Does Iuz have a date?!

No.

 

The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen walks in the great doorway, moving slowly and thoughtfully, his bandages tied around him in such a way that they made him look Sexy somehow. Regardless, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, aka SuperMummy, struts...uh thunders in the doorway. He looks around at all the strange faces, and nekkid people.

 

"Unnnnnnnhhhhhh, it seems to be that I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, were not invited to a party. Now I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, know that some of you are too young to realize that you are all worshippers of The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen. Yes, all are slaves before me, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen.

 

Unnnnnhhhhhhhhh, Do not fear though, for I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, am a leniant God. Not one for punishing, or hatred, or other non-fun things, except for those White Jackals who seemed to intrue upon the kingdom of The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen. Regardless..."

 

The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen looks around the hall, all attention focused soley on him. Smart people know that they are all followers of The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, for he is God, and well, you have to.

 

"Unnnnnhhhhhhhhh, now then, I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, wish to know who here is Cerulean. Not that I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, do NOT know, but with all of you followers, I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, cannot be trifled with remembering petty names...and Grinch lost my Palm last weekend in a poker match."

 

All people at the party immediately point to Cerulean, sitting where she is sitting (because you can't really be sitting someplace else if you're sitting where you're sitting). The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen nodded and walked over to a slightly scared Cerulean.

 

"So it was told that I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, am supposed to bestow upon you, a mere follower and worshipper of The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, a gift, is that right?"

 

Cerulean stared back at him blankly, seemingly frozen.

 

"Unnhhhhhhhhh, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen is not a patient diety..."

 

Cerulean nodded.

 

"Good. Then I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, give you the greatest gift ever. Since I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, have never been turned down before, declining this honor shall not be accepted. I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, do here by grant you the title of "Babe who is the Color of the Sky of The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen". My Priests usually would help bestow this upon you, however, Nissassa has gone missing in the jungles of New Zealand, Greased is currently passed out in some bar, Grim Squeaker is floating in a beer mug someplace, and Orlan....well, I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, need to hurt him."

 

The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen turns and starts to walk towards the free booze. He pauses a moment and reaches into his bandages and takes out a small stone tablet, with strange markings on it. He hands it over to Cerulean.

 

"Uhhhhhhnnnnn, I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, nearly forgot this. This is your other gift. It is the deed to Ager 2. I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, have no need for it since it's small and full of....uhnnnnnnnn White Jackals. So I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, give it to you, don't break it though, I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, still have a few more payments on it."

 

And with that The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen walks over to the free booze, hunting down his Priest of the Left side of the Priest to the Left side of The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, Orlan, to bust some heads....er I mean have a nice friendly chat....

 

...with the aide of some plagues of locusts.

 

------------------

Orlan, Sexy Sexy Man

The Lounge!

Member of the Tribe S1

Lounge Lizard of Terra

GuildMaster of "Nekkid Female Mages No. 1 FanClub and Worshippers"

Bard Of Terra

Member of Angels of Apocalypse on A1

Lover of Women

Priest to the left side of the priest to the left side of the great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen.

Elder of The Pen Is Mightier, Bard's Division (BH).

Co-Leader of Angels of Apocalypse, Beta Division.

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Tzimfemme and Rydia

 

Shuffling as fast as she can on her knees, the black-clad mage scurries up to the left hem of the left hem of the left hem of The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen. The marker squeaks as it scratches across the notepad, then is capped and the resultant note presented to The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen:

Hey, Boss, long time no see. All the booze has been polluted by the unbelievers falling in it, but there's a nice Hot Tub full of Liquor I staked out.

 

------------------

Tzimfemme (the naked); "Deleting nothing between maiden and mage"

 

Rydia adorned with pearls; Owner of the Anti-Spam Carp

 

Minta Rose, sunshine and moonlight; Calculus for the Masses!, Server Guilded

 

Proprietress of Happy Hentai Wholesale, Angels of Apocalypse, Ager Guilded

 

Constant Reader and Moderator, General Assembly and Ager Guilded

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Orlan

 

Uhhhhhhnnnnnnnn, well done Grim Squeaker with a nice rack. I, The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen, will see to it you get some good lovin' later. Let us go find this stash you have.

------------------

Orlan, Sexy Sexy Man

The Lounge!

Member of the Tribe S1

Lounge Lizard of Terra

GuildMaster of "Nekkid Female Mages No. 1 FanClub and Worshippers"

Bard Of Terra

Member of Angels of Apocalypse on A1

Lover of Women

Priest to the left side of the priest to the left side of the great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen.

Elder of The Pen Is Mightier, Bard's Division (BH).

Co-Leader of Angels of Apocalypse, Beta Division

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Culex

 

Culex apologises to Cerulean for not giving her a gift. Hastily he gives her the Carton of Unlimited Popcorn.

My work is done here.

 

*exits Culex*

 

 

------------------

Culex The Shapeshifter

Owner of the +12 Ion-Charged Blade

 

People can die by FOoD poisoning!

Dominions don't seem to stay dead! -Miracle

The water that hinders us shall one day be walked on. -Nature's Lore

It takes a single spark just to devastate an entire forest. -Inferno

Kicking a stone in anger will only hurt your foot. Revenge does not heal. -Contract of Soul

Geld, yes geld! Thats what my enemies have sent!

Geld! Geld! Everywhere, yet not a penny to be spent. -Fool's Gold

Those who think they know everything are annoying to those who do. *grins*

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Peredhil

 

Comfortably ignored, the youth finishes healing himself and watches the party with sad eyes, haunted by the shadows of years.

Comfortably ignored?!

A sigh.

Flipping through the index cards, he realizes that he should not be ignored. A whispered conference ensues with the Dominions, who appear to be protesting futilely. With drooping whiskers, the Dominions slip out the door.

 

Fifteen minutes later, A Giant Guinea Pig dressed in ill-fitting robes of a strange fustic color mopes into the hall. On the robe are two buttons. The first reads:

"Now that I is a College Student, I am Eruditer than Thou."

The other reads

"I have nothing to declare but my own brilliance."

 

This Concieted Rodent of Unusual Size is followed closely by a second RoUS, who looks even more downcast than the first.

The Second Big Pig is truly a bizarre sight, dressed in a multi-colored Harlequin costume.

One of the tasseled bells on the long-cornered tricornered cap dangles directly between the large brown eyes.

He carries a bright red rubber-tipped Plumber's Helper as a scepter, and wears a small Punchbox (the very brass handle is tipped with large brass balls,) on a stained Ribbon of Valor about his neck. The Jester Pig also wears a button reading,

"I've a little spy-bot short and stout,

Which with secret words, you can do nothing about.

 

Quickly tossing a couple of presents on the every growing pile, they stop just inside the door. The peaches-and-cream complexioned youth strides forth toward the pair, magnificent in his righteous wrath.

 

"Varlets! Knaves! So you would dare to bring your petty squabbles here! How long must I bear these persecutions!"

 

With a wounded look, the Harlequin says, "But Boss! Youse told us to-"

 

"Silence!" the Youth cries in ringing tones, "You are in the Shrubbery's Book of the Really Disliked Weenie People! Back! Back I say, to the Anthills of Dung where you belong!"

Turning to the rather puzzled crowd, the Lad cries in resonant throbbing tones, "you saw how they refuse to let it rest! But YOU may rest assured, WE shall end it in Honour!"

 

While this speech has rung out, the Smart Pig has been whispering furiously to the Jester Pig, who suddenly remembers his role.

 

"Umm, I dun like youse ideas and I want my own. I'm gonna go find some fun, make some flix, take some pix, grope some chix! You've forgotten how to relax." The Guinea Pig says Scornfully as he turns and waddles out of the Hall.

 

The remaining GP steps forward.

 

"When you say,

How long must I bear these persecutions!"

Youse is getting into Relativistic Quantum theory, which I learned in the Third Grade. Clearly youse does not know what youse is flappin' youse trap about. Furthermore, youse Shrubbery has plant lice!"

Looking him up and down in contempt, the Long-suffering leader replies, "I won't reply to that."

Turning his back, he continues "I won't bandy words with someone too young and immature to understand the issues about which he is speaking.

I am so tired of defending against the attacks of small-minded individuals that lack Honour.

Of course, I recognize that my definition of Honour may differ from yours, but it really doesn't matter because while I'm not talking to such an inexperienced person, my definition only applies to me internally and therefore may be used by me to judge others externally in action but not questioned by others because I already said it's internal and besides, I've had my definition rigidly defined longer than you've had your immature diapers and it's never changed and tradition is the proof of enduring truth, beauty and I like it."

a deep breath

"And the Gardeners of the Golden Shears have already removed the Aphid, the only Aphid, a poor confused misguided Aphid, an Aphid I called friend and wish only the best toward now that they have eradicated him and put him in as the only entry in the Book of Sprayed Bugs."

 

The Intelligent Boar, trying to count the points and keep them straight on its claws now has both paws twisted together.

"Bah! I hate Role-Playing anyway! And youth," He continues, looking at the Youth, "is no guarantee of maturity."

 

Feeling amBushed by the syStemic destruction of his Budding conversation, he Leaves.

 

With a twitch of his sleeve, the Noble Youth is suddenly in the center of a spotlight. The only other light in the room is a spotlight highlighting the card game where Cerulean, Wyvern, and ~O~ and Peredhil's Dove play.

 

"Alas that I could not be left in simple peace.

Pressed by the onerous duties which take up 80% of my waking hours, and the Real Life duties that take up the other 50%, I will withdraw regretfully before any of my other detractors come to ruin this lovely soiree."

 

Glowing with incandescent Purity, the youth (suddenly bloody but still unbowed,) walks to the door. The lights slowly come up as he exits quietly.

 

With shrugs, the gathered Party Crowd drown their collective sorrow at his departure with large quantities of Booze and food.

 

------------------

Elrond Peredhil, 31

Bard of Terra

The Pen is Mightier than the Sword-BH

Seekers of Babylon, Order of Scholars-BG

A Polite Mage

~Searching for Quality, not Quantity, in posting~

~Member of Nekkid Mages #1 Fanclub and Worshippers

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Cerulean

 

Mouth still agape at the visitation of Orlan/The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen AND a Demi God, Cerulean forces herself to snap it shut and regain her composure.

Swivelling around once again to face Wyvern, she musters her narrowest look, and stares at him levelly.

 

"Whenever you're ready", she growls striving to sound menacing and assured.

 

The dove settles on her shoulder, it now has a Cuban cigar in its beak and appears to be whispering instructions into Cerulean's ear. Peckle, who is tightly hugging the cloth Nim doll, sidles closer and hands her a gift which is wrapped in leaves and bark. Cerulean opens it tentatively, but is gratified to discover a book entitled Squirrel Soup for the Gambler's Soul - or how I became a Poker Guru - by Woods. Granted, it is an exceedingly slim volume, nevertheless, Cerulean places it gratefully onto the table before her, simply to intimidate Wyvern.

 

Due to the absence of her Goat, Cerulean is closely minded by Haruchi/Orlan's Satire to her left and The Demi-Gods' Inflatable sheep to her right.

 

She clutches the Chaos Ward in one fist - aware of the lengths to which Wyvern might stoop to secure the accumulation of yet more gold. Taking a deep draught from the Decanter, and pretending to enjoy it, she locks eyes with Wyvern and orders him to deal the first hand.

 

In the sweetest trill imaginable, Peredhil's dove chimes out the legend Bring it on! and the game commences.

 

 

------------------

Cerulean

 

Dark Mistress of the Desert

Guardian of the sacred stick of celery

Member of: Scarlet or Blue? - SoB - BG

Babe who is the Color of the Sky of The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen

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Haruchi

 

Wyvern takes the ~O~/Imposter cards in his hands, spreading them, flaying them, shuffling them, skiffling them, stacking them and performing many otherwise intimidating card tricks which involve much less trickerery than intimidation.

Wyvern pauses a moment, bringing the cards to his ear and fanning them, then cutting the deck and shuffling once more, a small frown on his face. "Strange," he muses, "but the crisp sound a fresh deck usually makes when you shuffle it is sounding more and more like whimpering."

 

He fixes Cerulean with a broad, toothy, grin and moves to deal the first card. At that very moment, a resounding scream echoes throughout the room, momentarily distracting both card players and their audience/flunkies. A man who would most likely be very sexy sexy if it were not for the horde of locusts covering him head to toe suddenly runs past the table screaming "GET THEM OFF ME! GET THEM OFF ME!!!"

 

------------------

 

Owner of Unique Item "The Hat of Obscurity"

aka "That guy I don't know who's covered in locusts"

 

General Knight of the Giant Nut

Member of AoA, AG

Scholar out Boozing, BG

Not particularly sexy man

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Wyvern

 

Thoroughly fixed in his gambler seat, Wyverns intense moment of nervous reflexion is interrupted by Haruchis little dillema. The Archmages eagerly waiting for the match to commence are annoyed by Haruchis whinings.

Archmages: "Ah GEEZE Haruchi! Take it else-where!"

 

Haruchi tries to scream something, but now is completly covered in locusts. All that comes out is an insectoid buzzing.

 

One of the Archmages angrily takes out of his beer a single locust that flew off of Haruchi and landed in his drink. He tosses the dead locust and the drink to the side. "You're going to pay me for that drink Haruchi!"

 

Haruchi tries to say something. Once again, only buzzing is heard.

 

Archmages: "Come ON Haruchi! We want to see this game! Next time, don't press your luck so much when trying to pick up a Verdant mage..."

 

Seeing that he will get no help from this group of mages, Haruchi rushes off elsewhere in the party in order to rid himself of the stinging beasties...

 

As all this was happening, Wyvern was growing less and less certain of himself... He hadn't realized that Peredhils dove enjoyed Ceruleans company... and the gambling book she had with her provided another deadly blow to his ego... He was uncertain how the dove would react now. Wyvern had trained the dove for over two months to do exactly as he had said... but then, he hadn't had the faintest idea that the dove enjoyed the taste of cuban cigars...

 

Having finished shuffling the whimpering deck, Wyvern deals a hand Cerulean and is about to deal a hand to himself when Cerulean stops him.

 

"Why don't I deal you your hand Wyvern?"

 

Wyvern laughs nervously and hands her the deck.

 

"Of course! Go right on ahead." he exclaims, while secretly cursing at not being able to cheat himself an awesome hand. Cerulean is more on target then he had expected...

 

Wyvern winks at Peredhils dove sitting on Ceruleans shoulder... but rather then chirping as the dove usualy does, it

lets out an enormous *SQUOCK!" and cigar smoke is blown into Wyverns face. He fans away the smoke, coughing and sputtering. This didn't look good at all...

 

Well, there was no turning back now... It was either a win at this game or a loss of 5,000,000,000 geld. Wyvern settles back in his chair, keeping a poker face and admiring his hand. For a moment, Wyverns face is distorted into horror. It had just occured to hime that he knew NOTHING about how to play the game "Dragons and Skulls"! He had simply carefully followed the directions of the dove in the previous games. The cards in his hands looked foreign to him...

 

Cerulean asks Wyvern "Well... what are you waiting for? Lets begin."

 

Wyvern lets out another nervous laugh.

 

"Since it's your birthday and all, you can start..."

 

 

 

 

------------------

Wyvern

...almost a dragon.

 

Proud Owner of the Decanter of Endless Booze.

 

Diplomat and representitive of Succubi or Bust (S.o.B )-BG

Unofficial member of the Mr. Bunny fan club.

"GIVE ME A CARROT GODDAMMIT!" -Mr. Bunny

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Finnius

 

Unbeknownst to Wyvern, the reason the cards looked so unfamiliar was not entirely his fault. Even had he known how to play Dragons & Skulls, the cards would have looked strange. And it was all due to what appeared to be a ten-year old girl named Pekkle.

The young demon was exercising (Or should tht be exorcising?) one of her talents. Instead of the normal swords, crowns, dragons, and skulls on the cards, Wyvern was seeing clowns, weasels, bottles, and platapusses. And they were all random.

 

The deck, of course, is sobbing quietly when a hung-over blue thing with fur glued all over it shambles up to watch the match.

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Cerulean

 

Cerulean is delighted that her Goat has finally showed, and hugs him warmly as he sits down next to her. She tucks his horn back under his costume, and lovingly straightens his tattered robes.

"I think I'd rather open my gifts in private darling" she whispers, "We have business to attend to first - a shirt to strip off a greedy Wyvern's back... Oh and could you do something for poor Haruchi? He looks so terribly uncomfortable."

 

Attending to the game once more, holding RG's hand tightly under the table for moral support, she eyes Wyvern's apparent confusion suspiciously, considering it to be yet another tactic.

 

"AHA - a perfect hand I believe" Cerulean chuckles rather too loudly. Her eyes right-angle to Goat, and she hisses in the barest whisper from the corner of her mouth "Do you have any idea how to play this game? I haven't got a clue!"

 

------------------

Cerulean

 

Dark Mistress of the Desert

Guardian of the sacred stick of celery

Member of: Scarlet or Blue? - SoB - BG

Babe who is the Color of the Sky of The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen

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Mindspawn

 

Just as he is about to apply one of his miniature oil flasks to the problem of the locust swarm mess, and feeling rather delighted at finally having found a good use for them, Mindspawn/Tyrion realizes that poor Haruchi might not appreciate this helpful gesture. At all.

With a wistful sigh, he puts the oil flask back onto his belt, and watches as Haruchi, still screaming and flailing his arms around, angles towards the pool of booze nearby. Oh well, maybe the locusts will drown themselves (or get really, really drunk?) trying to follow Haruchi into the pool, should he fall in...

 

Turning his attention back to the gambling table, he notices that Cerulean and Wyvern both seem to be a bit unsure of themselves, though trying very hard to conceal that fact from eachother. The game seems to hang in the balance here and, not wanting to see the guest of honor lose all of her un-birthday presents to Wyvern, Mindspawn/Tyrion sidles up to RG and wispers some advice in his ear.

 

"If you can figure out a way to do it quietly, now might be a good time to use Cerulean's new Ring of Djinni Summoning."

 

A loud splash from the direction of the pool announces the fact that Haruchi has indeed, willingly or otherwise, fallen into the booze followed by the persistent locusts. In the hope of actually seeing a Drunk Locust Swarm, Mindspawn/Tyrion takes off in that general direction with an encouraging wave and a silently mouthed "Good luck" to Cerulean.

 

------------------

Seekers of Babylon (SoB) - BG

Scholars

Dragon Knights

 

Embraced by the darkness, breathing it in.

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Holy Chaos

 

HolyChaos wanders over to the gambling table. Seeing Cerulean's predicament, he leaned over, and whispered into her ear "may the celery be with you".

------------------

- HolyChaos

- Maro-Necromancer of Terra

- Blessing be upon you, and may you live and die in peace

- Proud MODERATOR of the Celtic Warrior boards

HolyChaos@Hotmail.com

Ascendant Guide

Nether Guide

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~O~

 

At this point, a voice from the table, sounding distinctly uncomfortable, tells Wyvern to play his 16 of Clowns. Willing to take any port in a storm, the almost-dragon complies. The crowd leans forward; this game is not normally played with such a high-counting deck. No one has ever played a game with the "Doomsday Deck" without having a significant effect upon the entire state of the known world.

~O~

Cerulean, acting on other advice, plays the Celery of Platupi. The crowd gasps. When combined with the 16 of Clowns, will prepare the way for an invasion of Jesters who, armed with wands of celery, will terrorize the world with their miserable jokes, terrible pratfalls, and their disgusting pies.

~O~

The mage resembling Tyrion cries out in horror, "There's only one card in the deck that can prevent this tragedy: the Mime of Clowns! We're doomed!" Wyvern nervously tries to focus on his cards, but the ink seems to be running across them. A few moments later, his hand looks completely different, but he triumphantly plays the Mime of Clowns!

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Cerulean

 

Cerulean watches with despair, as the Mime of Clowns is played. She turns her gaze to Wyvern whose face is flushed with the triumph of victory. His mouth upturns in a leer of glee, and she knows she has to do some pretty quick thinking.

"Well played my friend", eyes scanning the room for the nearest exit...

 

"Guess you beat me fair and square", frantic gesticulations behind her back to gesture coded instructions to all her friends to pack up the gifts and run for the hills.

 

"Let me just shake the hand of the mighty Wyvern before I pay my dues."

 

Cerulean smiles sweetly. She appears to retain her serenity and holds out her hand to the almost Dragon. Her expression is absolutely inscrutable, and carries no hint of the computations galloping through her mind.

 

Wyvern stands and benificently extends his hand across the table in one last gesture of goodwill before he demands his dues. Cerulean takes his hand firmly within her own, and holding on tightly begins to pump it up and down repeatedly.

 

This has two consequences...

 

Firstly, as she anticipated, it provides vital seconds for her followers to start moving on the getaway.

 

Secondly, and to Wyvern's absolute horror, it mobilises the hitherto hidden contents of his jacket sleeve. Three cards tumble out and onto the table. They are all the Mime of Clowns...

 

------------------

Cerulean

 

Dark Mistress of the Desert

Guardian of the sacred stick of celery

Member of: Scarlet or Blue? - SoB - BG

Babe who is the Color of the Sky of The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen

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Wyvern

 

Wyvern glares in triumphant glee as he sets the Mime of Clowns in its rightfull position. A gasp rings throughout the audience. Had the lady of honour truly lost...? Was her un-birthday to be ruined by an overgrown lizard with a deck of cards? With a gleem of triumph, Wyvern shakes Ceruleans hand as she had demanded... only to accidentaly reveal his cards in "reserve". Wyverns facial expression distorts to one of horror. A cry rings out through the audience.

"Uhhhh... Hold on a minute... I can explain this..." Wyvern says nervously... but the Archmages in the audience seem unsatisfied with Wyverns cover up. Cerulean, who had been preparing to flee with her gifts, crosses her arms and taps one foot on the floor, looking at Wyvern in a very irritated manner.

 

A cry rings out from the audience: "HE TRIED TO CHEAT AGAINST THE LADY OF HONOUR!" A number of murmers of approval ring throughout the Archmage ranks.

 

Sweating profusely, Wyvern manages to stutter "I-I-I always keep a couple of those up my sleeve just in case I lose one from my deck! Yeah, that's it! These 3 'Mime of Clowns' are spares in case I can't find the one in my deck..." The mages stare at Wyvern blankly. "Honest!"

 

The audience seems to think for a moment and then one Archmage decides to state his opinion: "A rematch! Do a rematch! Have this game not count... Nobody loses or wins anything. Oh, and this time, be sure to search Wyvern of all his cards..."

 

Both Wyvern and Cerulean cry out "NO WAY!" at the same time.

 

"I should get all the presents!"

 

"No! I should win since Wyvern cheated!"

 

The two then stare at each other, and grumble in coherison "Very well..."

 

The deck is shuffled and the hands are distributed by Cerulean. Wyvern is searched by a number of Archmages who find 7 other cards hidden under different parts of his garments. Wyvern sighs at the thought of no longer having any cards in reserve...

 

"Very well... The lady of honour vs. The undefeated champion Round 2!"

 

Wyvern scans over his hand... Apart from the "Barrel of Monkeys" card and the "Frying Pan of Wonder" card, there was little of very much use... This did not look good. Cerulean watches Wyverns rather glum visage happily... this time, she wouldn't lose.

 

But if Wyvern could just draw his "King Bannana" card, victory would be his...

 

------------------

Wyvern

...almost a dragon.

 

Proud Owner of the Decanter of Endless Booze.

 

Diplomat and representitive of Succubi or Bust (S.o.B)-BG

Unofficial member of the Mr. Bunny fan club.

"GIVE ME A CARROT GODDAMMIT!" -Mr. Bunny

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Jechum

 

After a lot of pressuring from his good friends, Jechum arrives at the door, and transforms his illusionary appearance. Expecting a quiet party, the now half-elf peers in the door. Seeing the raucous festivity the raconteur enters slowly, obviously feeling slightly overdressed in his exquisitely tailored tuxedo with top hat and tails.

Realizing he's missing something, he pauses. Chanting softly, the smoke hovering around the ceiling swirls and shimmers absorbing light. Two Giant Guinea Pigs now stand before him. A few gestures finish shaping and solidifying the mists. One Giant Guinea Pig winks and the other nods towards the half-elf, both follow as he turns and descends into the hall. He makes a mental note not to walk them through anyone.

 

Strolling with casual grace to the table holding the presents, He drapes a platinum chain set with small diamonds over one of the boxes, and then moves to enjoy the party. A melancholy look haunts his eyes even as he appreciately smiles at the women and respectfully nods to the men. Silently wondering, if anyone recognize the masquerade and awaits someone to greet him utilizing the masquerade's name.

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Finnius

 

The pool of booze, after the first hand:

A pathetic blue wolf floats face-down, barely alive.

Meanwhile, just behind and to the side of Cerulean:

This was insanely fun. Not only had Pekkle met lots of nice people, she suspected that Cerulean would, indeed, take her in. The card game was going very well, but the competitors didn't seem to know what they were doing. Oh, well, that never stopped Pekkle from having fun.

 

She changed the cards once more, to alter the first four, and create a fifth and sixth suit, as well as two divisions of clowns. There were now, in this convoluted game:

Party Clowns, 1-18 and the Mimes

Circus Clowns, 4-7 and 12 Fire Eaters

Platapi, 1-18 and the King of Monotremes

Bottles, 1-5 and 5 Decanters

Ducks, 64-87

Ickies, 1-2 and 17 Spots

Mages, 1 for each Mage who had shown up

 

She hoped the players liked the new cards, but really, she just wanted to see what they would do.

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~O~

 

Wyvern grimaces, then accidentally drops the 85 of Ducks. However, when it lands on the table, its face actually reveals a small fairy dragon. A cry of anger from Cerulean follows this, and she immediately throws down an identical card. The crowd prepares to lynch the cheating Wyvern. The almost-dragon throws his hand to the table and backs away. All of the cards now display the mischievous dragon, the 17 of Spots. There is further muttering from the crowd.

~O~

Wyvern holds up his hands in the classic position of surrender... or one who is about to cast a fireball."But you searched me before the game! You know I didn't have those cards on me!" The crowd isn't exactly pleased with this statement, and begins to say so. Lady Cerulean lays her hand down as she watches.

~O~

An unknown voice from the table cries out, "Look at Cerulean's hand! It's composed entirely of the 17 of Spots, too!" Wyvern glances down, and then points his agreement. "Look! Look! Look! Look!" This important speach out of the way, the audience is rather stunned. How can there possibly be 14 copies of the 17 of Spots?

~O~

"Should they play another hand?" a voice from the crowd suggests. After some discussion, the two opponents once again sit down. However, both have the sleeves of their clothing rolled up, in an attempt to prevent further cheating.

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Silexion

 

Removing his dust-covered cloak to reveal a tastefully tailored tuxedo,

Silexion stands before the pulsating Hall. Coming from inside are all manners of sounds and colorful flashes.

A puzzled look comes over his face; "This is not at all what I was expecting. An invitation from Cerulean usually involves beaches at sunset; or a string Quartet."

This seems, perhaps, a bit out of character. He pulls out the parchment from Cerulean.

"I have planned a party. I would like you to attend, if your busy schedule allows.

It will be an intimate affair, but I am sure it will be an interesting and cerebral evening.

If I may be so bold, a bottle or two from your famous Cellar would be appreciated!

 

Date: The Ides of April

Place: The Great Hall of SoB

 

Respondez-vous, sil vous plait!"

 

The date and place were correct.

He had no time to message in the affirmative; but came directly from his land-acquisitioning activities in the South.

 

As he approached the door he read the notice mounted there by an impressive dagger.

This is no ordinary evening party!

He was to come as another Mage!

And a big, no HUGE, present was expected!

 

Suddenly, his two bottles seems totally inadequate.

A casting of Wish solved that problem; there are now 20 cases of the finest wine to offer Cerulean.

 

But another Mage!!

He realized that only Cerulean and maybe a few of her 'closest friends' would know him.

He steeled himself and reached for the handle on the enormous oaken portico.

 

But he was not ready for the images that greeted him as the door swung open.

 

ArchMages in costume; satyrs and demons; women, dressed and undressed; singing; dancing; fighting; liters of Ale pooling on the floor, and suddenly a locust-covered Mage ran screaming from the main hall.

 

"This is Cerulean's Party?????"

 

As he stepped in a large Ogre stopped him, "Who are you supposed to be; and more importantly, where is your Gift for the Lady of Honour?"

 

"There is my Gift, and I am dressed as Silexion."

 

The Ogre eyed Silexion with distrust but a blue-flash of Hallucination converted Buba into a lifelong friend.

 

"Could you carry those cases in for me?"

 

Silexion circled the room once trying to look at ease in his tux; his anonymity seemed to keep him out of trouble.

Then he saw her.

She was involved in a strange game of cards in the casino.

There was a bit of confusion, but then the cards were shuffled and dealt to the two of them.

The crowd around them was growing larger.

 

A small demoness, looking kinda like a ten-year old girl, grabbed Silexion by the finger and began pulling him toward Cerulean.

 

 

------------------

Silexion

 

CellarMaster/Cavist

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Haruchi

 

Haruchi/Orlan falls to the floor beside the Pool Of Booze, spitting out a sodden locust and making a moue of distaste. He spies Mindspawn/Tyrion standing before him with an expression of patient amusement, then notices the flask in his belt.

Haruchi leaps to his feet, snatching the flask before Mindspawn can react and flicking open the stopper in a single movement, pouring the contents down his throat in an apparent attempt to wash away the taste of locust.

 

Haruchi's face turns a bright red and twitches, looking not particularly sexy at all. His cheeks begin expanding at an alarming rate. Mindspawn has the prescence of mind to duck as Haruchi's mouth opens and a gust of flame shoots out, toasting several locusts.

 

Haruchi: Urgh.

 

Mindspawn carefully reaches for his flask and reseals it, placing it back in his belt. He makes a note to himself: Locusts definitely lack fire breath resistance

 

Haruchi finishes gagging and steadies himself against a table, spying a glass of water and frantically draining it. He puts the glass back on the table with a moment's hesitation, stoically ignoring the thine plume of smoke oozing from his nostrils.

 

Mindspawn makes another note: Miniature oil flasks not to be taken intravenously. He pauses, then adds an addendum: Keep out of reach of children

 

"Excuse me!"

 

Both Mindspawn and Haruchi turn toward the source of the thin, reedy voice. They are confronted by a locust clad in a top hat and tuxedo jacket and carrying a walking stick, hovering agressively before them.

 

"Might I enquire as to the purpose of this display?"the locust demands, prodding Haruchi with the walking stick.

 

Haruchi blinks. Failing to come up with a constructive response, he decides to blink again.

 

The locust flies right up to Haruchi's face and thrusts it's head right up next to his eyeball, sending him tottering back several steps. "Just what do you think you're doing, supplying alcohol to minors?"

 

Haruchi protests his innocence, but the locust shrilly interjects, "Liar! Don't you dare play innocent! It's common knowledge locusts only have a 7 year lifespan!"

 

Mindspawn peers over the edge of the Pool Of Booze to be greeted by bedlam. Bedlam quickly gets out of the way, realising Mindspawn is actually focusing on the locusts. One group of locusts is playing spin the bottle, a game complicated by the fact that not only does it take 50 of them to actually spin it, it also sinks to the bottom of the Pool everytime they let go. Some locusts can be seen lounging in inflatable pool chairs, sipping grasshoppers. Others can be seen surruptitously necking in the corners of the Pool. Some locusts may well be engaged in drinking contests, if the large number floating face down is any guide. Another group of locusts seems to be playing a game of highstakes cards, steadfastly ignoring a smaller group of locusts who seem to be sharing a game which involves running past the cardplayers and pretending to die.

 

Mindspawn makes another note to himself: Do not cast Summon Locust Swarm when intoxicated

 

He turns back to Haruchi and the tophatted locus, to see the locust take a swipe at Haruchi with it's walking stick, sending Haruchi backpeddling and falling flat on the floor. The locust darts at him, beating him around the head, screaming at the top of it's tiny lungs "Have you no conscience? Have you no guide?"

 

Mindspawn makes a final note before closing his notebook: Best defence against SLS: Wooden Soul

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Cerulean

 

"SILEXION!"

Cerulean rushes over to greet her A2 ally and oldest friend. Remembering half way that she is supposed to be at the card table, she calls over her shoulder to Wyvern that he should take five and expect her back momentarily.

 

Thanking Peckle for escorting her guest through the crowds, Cerulean agrees to take the small Demon under her wing. Meanwhile she leads Silexion to the table of honour which is occupied by those dearest to her. There she introduces him to her friends and her wonderful Goat.

 

"Make this Mage welcome", she smiles, "He is new to these parts, but not new to the perils and tribulations of the battlefield. He will make you a staunch friend, or a deadly enemy. Remember this well."

 

Cerulean watches Silexion be seated, then adds with a grin...

 

"More importantly, he's got great taste in wine and a sturdy trachea!"

 

She is about to continue, when her speech is interrupted by a low rumbling sound emanating from Zool's zig-zagging box...

 

 

 

 

------------------

Cerulean

 

Dark Mistress of the Desert

Guardian of the sacred stick of celery

Member of: Scarlet or Blue? - SoB - BG

Babe who is the Color of the Sky of The Great God and Pharaoh Nanotoknonnen

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Tzimfemme and Rydia

 

"Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" shrills Minta-Nim as she flies out of the white-water rapids ride. Still clutching white-knunckled at the raft, Gyr-Wyvern and a headless body (~O~ was thrown clear some time ago) shudder and whimper. Minta tucks into the classic Nimball form and lands safely atop one of Wyvern's goon squad. Incidentally, the ogre who lost his life thus was a distant cousin of Kraag and a priest of the Cult of Sudden Blue Death from the Sky. But I digress. . .

She uncurls and steps off of the quivering form, then is immediately distracted by Raging-dhil and Jechum-dhil trying to one-up each other with Peredhisms. One riffles through a book of Quotable Quotes while the other studies a pack of swiped notecards, saying "No, I don't forfeit my turn!"

 

Minta fishes around for an extra E to sort out the problem, but realizes that it wouldn't help this time. Instead, she slurps thoughtfully on a pixy stix as she circles first one false Peredhil, then the other. Minta-Nim pokes and prods with a lollipop stick, asks for one to boost her up so she can look in the other's ears, and chews on her lower lip; Pekkle pops up beside Minta and swipes a pixy stix while she is so occupied.

 

"Oh gooooooooooonies," she calls, waving at the remainder of Wyvern's squad. Fearfully they approach the little blue pseudo-demigod. "The nice lady said she wanted this one," she points a cherry pixy stix at Raging-dhil, "to perform." Instantly Raging-dhil is trussed and tethered onto the stage.

 

------------------

Tzimfemme (the naked); "Deleting nothing between maiden and mage"

 

Rydia adorned with pearls; Owner of the Anti-Spam Carp

 

Minta Rose, sunshine and moonlight; Calculus for the Masses!, Server Guilded

 

Proprietress of Happy Hentai Wholesale, Angels of Apocalypse, Ager Guilded

 

Constant Reader and Moderator, General Assembly and Ager Guilded

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Wyvern

 

Though still nervous of the outcome of the gambling games to come, Wyvern is releived to be able to take a little break from the games... He takes a few swigs from his Decanter and decides to see how the rest of the party is going. Wyvern had spent a great deal of time gambling, and hadn't greeted a number of the guests that had now arrived. How very un-hostly of him...

Wyvern first makes his way to the entry way where Silexion has arrived. He passes by Cerulean and shakes Silexions hand with an enormous toothy grin.

 

"Pleased to make your aquaintance. I'm Wyvern... (hands Silexion his card) Be sure to ask about my '7-year extension' savings program."

 

In passing Cerulean on the way out of the entry way, Wyvern whispers to her: "Be sure to inform me when you're ready to gamble again. We still have unfinished buisness to attend to."

 

Wyverns next stop is the booze swimming pool/Ride facilities. On seeing the current state of the pool, Wyvern spits out the booze he was sipping on and lets out a shriek. Locusts were EVERYWHERE! Walking around the pool side... flying through the air... swimming and water skiing in the pool... There were even entire groups of locusts hogging the rapids ride! Wyvern rushes onto the pool-side, avoiding locusts the best he can, and notices Haruchi talking to what appears to be a formaly dressed locust while Mindspawn franticaly writes thoughts on a parchment. Both are miraculously untouched by the swarm.

 

Wyvern makes his way through the tons of flying locusts and manages to reach the two untouched mages. The formal locust seemed to be finishing a sentence of a conversation. Haruchi is nodding his head while Mindspawn is rapidly jotting notes, muttering "fascinating."

 

"...and so, you see Haruchi, us locusts are treated FAR less extravagantly then our demeaner would sugge..." The locusts sentence is cut short as Wyverns foot comes down with an enormous stomp on the formal (and now former) locust. *SQUASH!*

 

"Wyvern! What are you doing?! You stepped on Monty!" Haruchi cries. Mindspawn sighs and jots down Don't let formal locusts get close to Wyvern

 

"Monty?!" exclaims Wyvern. "MONTY??!!" (Wyvern points to the pool and the rides) "Are you BLIND Haruchi?! You've turned the beautifull pool-side into Locust Land™!"

 

Haruchi and Mindspawn are not paying attention to Wyvern, however, but rather are preparing what appears to be a locust funeral ceremony for Monty. Wyvern sighs and feels a migraine coming on. He would just have to call the exterminator...

 

Wyvern notices a hyper-active Minta-Nim heading towards the performance center and dance stage of the party along with three of Wyverns ogre minions. The minions are carrying a tied up RagingGoat... Wyvern decides to investigate. He passes what appears to be a rumbling package that is zig-zagging across the ground with a steadily increasing amount of fervor. On the cover of the package is written:

 

From: Zool

To: Cerulean

Have fun and be carefull!

 

Wyvern decides he doesn't even WANT to know what's in the package. It was the birthday girls problem.

 

By the time Wyvern had reached the dance floor, the lights had dimmed and the people previously dancing had stopped and grown silent. Wyverns minion Buba slowly reads a manuscript handed to him by Minta.

 

"Aaannnd... nowww... Buuuu- Buuu (grunts) Buba (Buba looks at a word on the parchment confused) p- preeesent on beehhaf of Minta Roooose: Raggging-dhil." There is an applause from the audience and Buba grunts and bows the best he can, relieved at having managed to read what he considered an incredibly complex parchment.

 

Two stage lights turn on and shine down on the stage... more precisely on a terrified RagingGoat disguised as Peredhil who trembles there. The enormous audience remains silent and waits for Raging-dhils act to commence...

 

 

------------------

Wyvern

...almost a dragon.

 

Proud Owner of the Decanter of Endless Booze.

 

Diplomat and representitive of Succubi or Bust (S.o.B )-BG

Unofficial member of the Mr. Bunny fan club.

"GIVE ME A CARROT GODDAMMIT!" -Mr. Bunny

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Scarlett O'Harpy

 

With impeccable timing and the aplomb of the truly deluded, Harpy swans down the marble staircase. Her nekkidness is accentuated by a shimmering feather boa and an unapologetic smile. Some sixth sense has clearly alerted her to the fact that not only are there sexy, sexy mages present, but also chocolate covered locusts, unlimited alcohol and a male stripper avec horn.

She begins to elbow her way towards the stage with enthusiasm, pausing only to offer a regal wave to Wyvern and his hangers-on.

 

"Where's Rapture?" mouths Wyvern, puzzled.

 

Scarlett raises an eyebrow, gestures vaguely behind her and pulls out a tooth-pick. Wyvern gets the picture.

 

She is approaching the stage when she notices a beautifully gift-wrapped box and gazes at it with mounting avarice.

 

Cerulean already has so many gifts, she surely wouldn't miss this one. And the wrapping is just so shiney and appealing. She and Scarlett are virtually twins after all, and what belonged to one should clearly belong to the other...

 

Having easily justified the theft to herself, Harpy nudges the box to a dark corner of the room with the side of her foot. The box glides very readily across the floor, almost as though it were cooperating. She sidles alongside it. It is fortuitous indeed that those who observe Harpy's movements, are certainly not attending to her feet.

 

Once safely in the gloom away from prying eyes, the parcel glows appealingly. Scarlett moistens her lips and begins attacking the ribbons which bind it fast. She rips off the label rashly, not caring it's so clearly to Cerulean, and from her good friend Zool, to boot.

 

The box is swiftly unwrapped. Scarlett leans over and prises the lid off with her fingernails. Inside, resting on velvet, are a dainty cake and a tiny bottle stopped with a miniature cork.

 

Scarlett stamps her foot with petulant disappointment. She had anticipated something far more exciting than that! She disregards the beautifully calligraphed tag which reads Welcome to Wonderland, and nibbles on the cake.

 

 

------------------

Scarlett O'Harpy

 

The two phases of fire are craving and satiety

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Finnius

 

Finnid had woken up to locusts playing hopscotch on his spleen. With real scotch. So, he adventurously, or perhaps unknowingly, wandered the halls of this massive party, looking for the bathroom.

Eventually, he found one, however, it was on the fourth floor, behind a small construction site. It took him several minutes to get through the thing and into the bathroom, whereupon he promptly fell into a door, and forgot why he came in there in the first place. Oh, well.

 

The battered, bruised, and bombed blue mage in wolf's clothing then fell over a banister, and into what appeared to be the seat of a rollercoaster. Odd that such a thing should be-

 

Whhheeeeeee ZOOOOM-POP-Zing Whrrrrrrrr-rush

 

A now-dizzy little blue man manages to claw himself out of the rollercoaster and collapse on the Tastless-Teal™ linoleum.

 

Meanwhile, somewhere right behind Cerulean,

Pekkle was very happy that the nice lady had agreed to take her in, but was a bit irked that she couldn't see what was going on. Someone had been escorted up to the stage, and suddenly there were hundreds of people crowded in.

 

Whenever she asked Cerulean what was going on, she just patted Pekkle on the head and absently said, "When you get older."

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