Archive

Isachar HC: Peredhil, feel free to do it again! This goes to anyone who gets the urge to amuse themselves with the squirrel duo. I started writing this whole scenario on a whim, and I've got only the vaguest idea of what I want to do with it. If any of you folks think they can help give it a little direction, I'm more than willing to play along.

Gyrfalcon25: *Gyr cheers on the thread* Yay! Keep it goind. =)

Falcon2001: THANK YOU PEREDHIL! Anyway, the other paragraphs aren't really stories anymore...they are more of a sort of descriptive...but I'll post them anyway...at least it'll be a little bit of a showcase of my *little* talent. CiodenDarkeye Initiate of The Pen Hopeful Patron Saint of Impatience

peredhil31: Just as a side note - Not only are you active, you're really coming up with some good ideas. I'm actually wishing I had more time to spend online! Good job! -P

I've looked at this a few times now... I'd really like to see the missing paragraphs. I can't think how to role-play myself into it - but I'd reallly like to see where you go with this Falcon. I want more! -P

gwaihir1: It wasn't obvious, but it was certainly there, I recognized it.

Jechum: No! Just want to know how obvious I was... I tried to hide it yet keep it easy... Just wondering if I fooled anybody. I mean that what this place is for request and unrequested feedback! Even a Lore Master likes feedback and therefore I thought I'd ask because it didn't look like I was going to get any. Edited by: Jechum at: 10/18/01 5:41:47 am

peredhil31: Peredhil bounces up and down, waving his hand. Call on ME! I've know where the path leads!!! Should I give a hint to the Classically Literature Impaired (CLI)? Peredhil

Just looking for some feed back on "The Path to Jechum's Cottage" Please don't give it a way but I was wondering how many people think they know where my path leads.

Orlan: Gee, several people have asked you? Apparently I'm supposed to be mad at more people then I thought lol. Nah, this isn't about any specific people, they might have been in my mind when I wrote it, but that's how writing works. And Pered: I'll be damned if I can ever spell exsist correctly Stupid "x"s sounding like "s"s and "s"s sounding like "4"s.

peredhil31: Funny you should say that Elder Zoolio - SEVERAL people have asked me if the poem was directed at them. Which was a relief, because I saw some aspects of myself in it too. It's a powerful piece of work that can touch so many people so personally, and cause them to reevaluate themselves and the way they deal with others...

Zool47: A powerful piece, but technicalities aside, I find myself idly pondering - for whom the clock ticks. ~Zool~ Elder of Elders, The Pen is Mightier than the Sword. Bard of Terra, Patron Saint of Aspiring Bards. Elder than dirt, more foolish than a jester, able to trip over the smallest logic in a single step. It's... Oh, you know.

peredhil31: Too true. A different perspective on the subject Orlan; a good read, or at least I enjoyed it immensley! In the third stanza -> exist In the seventh -> duece. That small spelling errors exist impresses me even more - to me it would indicate that this was written quickly, instead of crafted and built laboriously. Wow. Peredhil who himself can't seem to spell today. Edited by: peredhil31 at: 10/16/01 2:20:13 pm

I sometimes debate on whether I should post when I only have complimentary things to say, and nothing deep, but I found this poem Really neat. Grim, cold, impressive.

Falcon2001: Thanks for the reply, Peredhil, and also for anyone who posts here in the future...it seems like the REPLY raven may have a vacation in the works. CiodenDarkeye Initiate of The Pen Hopeful Patron Saint of Impatience

Very good use of form and rhythm to drive the poem's running meter. One can feel the tension and strain - very nicely done!

Wow! Vivid descriptions, always 'in character'. Really enjoyable read.

Brute3: Thank you all for your words. As I mentioned in the other post regarding my 'poem', it was a way for me to vent and release some of my emotions. I think that I wrote it in a way meant to be spoken, not necessarily read, if that makes any sense whatsoever. I do appreciate the helpful remarks and the encouragement, but I'm afraid that poetry is most certainly not my style. I prefer and am more comfortable writing incomplete stories. I simply wanted to say something, and now that it has been said, I remain silent once more, never wanting to use that voice again. Brute O Drunken One

Mister Burrofoot: Brute My friend, I do not believe poetry has a specific structure... The structure of a poem, is how you emphasize the words, and what you want to portray with these words.. I think that poem is very good indeed, it catches the readers eyes, and thoughts of many people for they can relate.. Very good Job.. The Kender..

peredhil31: I cry from the heart - as poetry should be. I think this has potential. Hugs Write more - you'll get better. Even if you never FEEL better about your own poetry. I still hesitate to post every time I write... We do not write because we want to; we write because we have to. W. Somerset Maugham

I don't know... wouldn't call it nonsence... I think you wrote it rather well... You can alway fix structure later, capturing the inspirations the important part... I think it would make a good song, but it just as good as stand alone verse... revery the dreamlost "...but i'm not the grl you once but your faith in, just someone that looks like me"(aimee mann/humpty dumpty) the dream continues...

Yui Temae: Argh! It's at the top of the must-read list, Brute-dear. I'm sorry that I haven't had the time to get to your long-awaited story before now, but I'll be sure to give you all the praise you deserve when I've finally gotten to read it! Impatiently, ~Yui-chan

Brute3: thanks! Praise is always good. I'm glad you enjoyed the way I wrote it. There is much I would like to have included, such as a much greater detailed description of the valley, the house, Jarom, Jarom's history (actually, that'll be touched on a bit more soon), and so forth, but the need for brevity won. Anyway...thanks for reading it. I hope that I can continue to hold your interest. Brute O Drunken One

This is well written-- I especially liked the fact that you took the time to introduce the history behind the story by having the main character think back on it, with items that take him back then-- a daydreaming sort of style, rather than just use a prologue to get people what they need to know. Kept my interest throughout. Well written, Brute. Continue!

Carlyan the Wise: Oh, sorry... that was dumb of me. I meant to go back and translate, but I forgot. I'll go edit the post now.