My first thought was "this is a horribly cliche subject, 'oh I'm a victim pity me oh boo hoo hoo'". BUT, your very thoughtful vocabulary kept me interested enough to re-read several times. Having delved deeper into the piece, the cynical undertones of assertion become clearer. Though the writer underscores the negative repercussions of his actions he more dominantly questions the value of a seemingly "noble" act, the act of helping someone at the cost of one's own energy/emotions/strength. We are not wallowing in self pity here, rather we are beginning to work up the resolve to break a vicious cycle. Indeed, why do I do this?
Nit pick: I'd change "why do I do it" to "why do I do this". "It" has more of a generic connotation whereas "this" would give the impression of applying specifically to the scenario we are reading about and give the piece more immediacy and urgency.
Thanks for this.