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The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

Help! I need to create somebody!


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Any of those who have read my recent "Nothing in the Beginning" story that I posted on these boards will know that I am a guy who loves to write humorous stories (and if you didn't read it - shame on you!).

 

What most will not know is that Nothing is just a segment of a much larger story that I am working out in my head, involving God, the Peanut Gallery, the Angels, the Devil, and all those lovable humans who mess stuff up. Maybe Voltaire too, if I can squeeze him in.

 

First off, let me explain how I get my ideas: My head is a wacked up place. People die in there. But the point is, I'm always thinking up wacky stuff throughout the day - something will happen, and my brain might go off with a marvelously exaggerated form of whatever just happened, or funny little twists to what I am experiencing will appear in my head. I set my mind on a hair trigger for these ideas, and then whenever one appears, I grab it, call it my precious, love it, hug it, name it George, then store it in a little mental vault of mine (which contains a lot of Georges, let me tell you...)

 

But the problem is, lately, when I've tried to put these ideas to paper, they fragment. The stuff that comes out isn't funny. It's mainly because I've been trying to write stuff not involving God (the main character in Nothing, the only work completed for this story as of yet), but instead branching up into some of the other characters I've dreamed up.

 

I think I've pinpointed whats stopping me, but I'm going to need help on developing convincing characters to go along with the funny little quirks, habits, mannerisms, dreams, aspirations, physical appearences, or other funny stuff about them. Any advice on developing characters would be greatly appreciated. Note that, unlike some of the work on these boards, these characters are (usually) modern day people (some might act a little out-of-century, buts that part of the charm)

Here's a list of funny ideas in my head for you guys to get an idea of what I'm talking about:

 

- The Holy Roman Emperor (in a much reduced form - basically, the only perks are free travel throughout the former empire, a small duckpond in Austria, and some other yet-to-be-determined stuff. Oh - diplomatic immunity, of course! Yes, I know technically the title of HRE doesn't exist anymore, use your suspension of disbelief)

 

- An Eastern European farmer who is the 64th heir-in-exile to the kingdom of Raglut, a kingdom that once stretched for as far as the eye could see in Southwest England - though you have to keep in mind that, since it was surrounded by trees (with a little break in the forest where a section of road broke of to meet the field the kingdom occupied), the eye could only see for about 2 square miles, plus a little ways into the forest. It was ignored by the English because it wasn't worth the expense of sending troops to conquer it until the beginning of the 100 Years war, when Edward III's troops, passing by on their way to France, burned it, sacked it, and annexed it as an afterthought, sending the "Royal Family" into exile in Eastern Europe (actually the English didn't give a damn about the Royal Family, and forgot about them promptly), where they still foster a hatred for the English and a burning desire to reclaim their kingdom (which is taken up mostly by a stretch of highway, unbeknownst to them) (I think thats how you spell unbeknownst). Note that I'm considering having the farmer have an unhealthy obsession with "The Lion King".

 

-The angel Gabriel (sorry for you guys who don't like me messing with Biblical characters & such - I don't mean to offend you or anything). Gabriel is essentially god's left hand man, and also his closest friend. He was one of the first angels created, and he is significantly different from the rest of the angels in attitude and looks. Attitude wise, whereas most of the angels are utterly subservient to god, a little bit vain, and also a bit good-naturedly ignorant at times (I'm working on the profile for the average angel, but basically one that, while it accomplishes God's needs, also deprives him of a good friend he can goof off with) , Gabriel is a friendly little guy with an attitude like God's, but not entirely the same. He too enjoys goofing off and shirking his duties for some fun down on Earth, going and playing tricks on mortals for fun (him and God thought they'd never stop laughing at that whole "I am who I am" thing - they got into histerics thinking about how much screwy theology was going to come out of that one). Also, whereas most angles look noble, superhuman, winged, celestially glorious basically, Gabriel looks strangely akin to Gonzo from the Muppet Babies, but with wings (and his nose isn't quite that big...). Gabriel does oddjobs for God that God doesn't trust other angels to do, or just thinks that Gabriel can do better. He is also, technically, an Archangel, but he rarely bothers going to the little Archangel councils or stuff they do because generally he'll make some joke that he thinks is marvelously funny, only to start laughing and realize that all the other Archangels are all giving him a "Huh?" look.

 

[Note: I feel on the most stable ground with Gabriel, because I've sort of got a personality developed for him, and generally whenever I mess with unknowns like angels and God, it's easier to be funny because I'm developing whole new ground, going against stereotypes so reinforced that anything I do seems funny because it's contradictory to what you expect out of such a figure]

 

- There are many, many, many more ideas that A) I don't have the time to type out, and B) Refuse to come out right now because they resent being named George

 

Hopefully this will be enough for you guys to work on, so help me out here and remember - Help Buddha, and maybe one day you'll recieve a burnt cooking mitten!

 

You never know...

Edited by HappyBuddha
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Well, i can't say that i blame them! i wouldn't like being called George either, even if you did hug me and love me! ;)

 

Character creation has always been one of the hardest things for me. Setting is generally a piece of cake, and flow of events - it takes some time, but it does come along. Finding the "who" to do the "what" can drive a sane man mad, though, and as i was never sane to begin with... (g)

 

One of my favorite tools is building on a specific trait i've noticed in someone. Say i'm walking through the store and see someone do something that in the context is puzzling or slightly odd. What kind of person would he or she be, for that to be a normal and reasonable response? How did he or she become that kind of person? Invent the history which led to that moment, and you have your character. This works much better for me because it's a matter of flow of events then, as they influenced the formation of the character, and flow of events is easier than spontaneous character generation. It takes something which is difficult for me and makes it possible by doing it in the realm of something which is less difficult.

 

Whether this would be useful for you, i don't know. Whether this even makes sense to you, i don't know. :) i hope so, however. A head full of ideas is a crowded place to be, and downright uncomfortable when they thoroughly resent their names!

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You also need a plot... sure you got some ideas... but now it's time to chain them inside your head... it's like playing with Mad Dr.Tzim mixing kit... you got a lot of ingridants in there, but you gotta mix them up together.

 

1) You got yourself a farmer destined to be a heir... and he'll prolly have to think he'll need to fight his way back to retain what he believe is rightful to his family.... so what is he gonna do about it? what means is he gonna to achieve his goal?

2) Throw the holy Roman catholic empire in the picture... how does it help the prince? does it has the prince's family record to prove his birth right? does the prince think the empire is gonna lend him some aid?

3) How is angel Grabriel help/hinder the prince? did the prince just pray for divine guidance and he came? what sorta of practical joke does grabriel plan to play on the prince?

 

Ofcourse there is no one way to go at this, you can change the order and make the farmer boy evil who desire to rule over his land again with an iron fist... he fears the holy roman empire because of their might, and after all that scheaming, planning, and all his effort he finally gets what he wants... but it's nothing except a 3 acer lot near the sea... he throws that thing away and then some ppl discover gold along the shore... irony and stuff

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Character creation...

The way I usually do it is

1) What do they do for a living/hobbies, where and when?

2)Why?

a. What in their personality makes them do that?

b. What in their history brought them here?

 

In that order. It's still a process I'm perfecting, becuase my charcter creation modes still tend to be maybe a little too much "natural selection" because of how much more roleplaying I do than regular writing. But it's fair enough success.

 

My strongest recommendation is Stephen King's method:

Find out exactly who your characters are before you write them in. Where they're from, what they do for a living, what are their favorite foods, how many moles do they have on their hands, absolutely everything, even if you don't end up using most of it. Then they *will* come across as more believable.

 

Or so Mr. King says. In this case, I'm not sure if realism might what you want, but...one way to find out, non? Good luck!

Edited by Ozymandias the Elder
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