FrozenWombat

The little wombat opened his mouth to speak, but couldn't seem to get anything out but a few angry grunt-chirps. Blushing a furious shade of red, he made a few frenzied gestures with his hands... "And now I can speak in Common. Right, so. Every year, around the time of the winter holidays, there used to be a huge celebration at the mage school around New Year's. All the Master Mages would get their wizened old heads together and cook up some amazing suprise for all of the students, to add a little extra zest to all the celebration. Every year, there was great anticipation about what the year's suprise would be. Often, they played a prank on several members of the graduating class, but it was nothing like this..." Taking a moment to scratch his head, the little wombat continued. "So, on the year of my graduation from the School, everyone was as usual wondering what the year's suprise would be. So I'm sitting and drinking with some friends, and by the time the celebration has started I've had one too many glasses of Bruteweiser, and I've forgotten all about Masters' little suprise. So I'm walking down the hall, just a little tipsy, when I notice that the golems are looking at me all funny-like, and I start to wonder what's going on. Of course, the fact that I'm drunk off my..." The wombat let out a little cough, then continued. "So I just keep going, and I'm making my way to the great hall, when all of a sudden I feel some sort of spell tighten around me, and I pass out." "And that's how I ended up hanging from my underwear in the great hall." When he noticed that no-one was laughing, the little wombat sighed. "All right, I'll tell you about my Christmas tradition then. Every Christmas, my zombie seals get a bit annoyed you see. Nothing to do, everyone's out playing with their presents, and there's a general sense of happyness and merriment in the air. So a few years ago, I started this tradition. Every Christmas, I go back to Terra and take them on a little raid of enemy territory. They love it. Nothing like sowing confusion and chaos in the enemy ranks on Christmas day! So yeah, I just take my little pets and we go and pillage and plunder to our hearts content. It's a great gift for the lovely creatures." "What?" "Why are you all looking at me like that?"

A FrozenWombat flies through the door, soundly thumping his head on one of the interior walls, the Wombat somehow manages to translocate a small Ice Sculpture of a Dark Fortress in a land far, far away into the center of the room, narrowly missing the almost draconic form of Wyvern. Slightly startled, the Wombat produces a top hat and cane, and bows with a flourish to Aurora all the while floating in the air. Then, as his eyes dart around the room, the Wombat mutters something about a disturbing lack of cheesecake in these parts. Spinning wildly, there is a loud popping noise as the wombat vanishes into thin air, leaving a small pile of dirt on the ground behind him. Welcoming another AoD mage to the Pen . ~Frozen

I can't take credit for the entirety of this work, it was a sort-of joint collaboration inspired from a rather interesting conversation. So remember, this work is not entirely mine, the entire first verse wasn't written by me. Still, I thought maybe it was good enough to merit a posting on the Pen. Enjoy . i don't understand the attraction it's just about these chemicals things we never saw anyway maybe just a fraction would keep those radioactive minds together but tomorrow he'll wake up and hope for the best with the atomic weight of thoughts that run through his head "it's all in the bond, sir" said a futile attempt to keep up the heat of their bodies they could never absorb, and as it all went ''its time to see what we're made of" lost in a maze of physical praise a fiery passion, just a distraction from a chemical (non) reaction.

I be a youngling. for a second there, i actually forgot how old i was . 15

Congrat's P! Wyvern even hit you with an Almost-Draconic Brand shoutout on the air.

~Brief Description~ FrozenWombat is a rather enigmatic figure, with the ability to switch between human and animal form, although he spends the majority of his time in his animal form. A Wombat gifted with supreme control over temperature drops, he is rather... unique. He tends to eat various roots and herbs, and as of yet not another soul knows that he possesses the ability to return to human form. He enjoys coffee and other hot drinks, suprisingly enough. ~History~ After an early life of overly stereotypical 3rd-Edition Dungeons and Dragons adventuring, FrozenWombat was put through a rather drastic change. A rather strange polymorphing accident (although the term "accident" is rather debatable) involving a corrupt Dungeon Master, a succubi, a stereotypically mad wizard, and a set of Hungry Hungry Hippos™ placed him in Wombat form, and he came to enjoy the benefits of his new stature, which was about 5 feet shorter than it had been previously. Later unlocking hidden powers and ascending to the status of a near-demigod Archmage, FrozenWombat was recruited into the Army of Darkness in the alternate dimension known as Ager Guild. Suffering through several episodes in which he was killed and reborn, FrozenWombat became a feared name- his telemarketting hordes where nigh-unstoppable. As a result, their usage was eventually barred from the vast wars that took place on this and several other similiar dimensions. Returning to his Handy Dandy Pocket Plane™ after a species of Mari Monkeys caused the massive wars to cease via a grand piece of magic known as financial difficulties, FrozenWombat returned to find out that this same piece of magic had caused every last piece of geld he had to vanish, and is now seen leading a band of squirrel banditos across the frozen tundra of his homeland, in search of gold to pay off a series of rather unfortunate debts he acquired as part of a Contract of the Soul. Work in Progress

Thanks to all who replied, and thanks to Wyv for approving it . Hopelessly grinning at both the stamp on his application and Wyv's next scheme, FrozenWombat created a small Wyvern ice sculpture and ran out of the room on all fours, holding his application in his mouth. For several days, the inhabitants of the pen would be startled by a marsupial darting among their legs, holding his appected application like a trophy.

who were peacefully at rest in the garden

I'm going to lean away from sweets and towards chips and other such junk food with with my post. Just today, I had a bag of Munchos. Now, Munchos have been around for a while, but as hey're not a big-brand potato chip, I thought they might deserve speical mention. They're incredibly salty, but they are decent. Dorrito's Guacamole- I Haven't yet been able to bring myself to eat green dorritos, although I am a sucker for guacamole. Lays Baked Chips- "Healthy" Potato chips. One of those things that makes me laugh. Rosemary Garlic Olive Oil Potato Chips- The designer clothes of chips, these things are possibly the best chips on the planet. They don't come cheap, but I love them. I'm not sure whereabouts you can get them, but I picked them up at a small NYC grocery store. Like Muncho's. these aren't all that recent, but I thought they deserved some special mention. On a side note, I'm also a sucker for White Chocolate, although I can't consume it in the same quantities as milk or dark.

The wombat's small, marsupial feet made only the slightest noise as he crossed the tiled floor into the recruitment office. Muttering something about polymorph spells, he scratched his head and walked over to the instructions for registration. "Written Application?" Procuring a small pipe from out of thin air, the wombat took a small puff and sat down at the desk. Twirling his fingers, he muttered an incantation. A pen and parchment appeared from thin air, landing on the desk. Thinking for a minute, the wombat realized he had absolutely no idea what he was going to write. Then it came to him- A tale of wonder and magic, of kangaroos and wizards. His own life story. Starting to scribble away, the wombat began to sweat as his pen moved furiously across the page. My Life Story- A Tale of Marsupial Transformation And so begins, a tale of wonder and magic whose true details have been lost to the mists of time. Be warned, fair reader, that the contents of this particular story are so exciting, so jaw-dropping, that they may cause some small amount of doubt over just how much of it is true. In fact, this entire story is absolutely 100% truth, with perhaps a smidgeon of embellishment. A young wizard by the name of Jack was once an adventured by trade. After joining up with a party of adventurers strait from a 3rd Edition Dungeons and Dragons game, he set off on a grand adventure. The big ugly paladin was having trouble getting along with the sneaky rogue, and the elven archer remained aloof, but that was nothing out of the ordinary. Jack talked at length with the party's designated cleric over the benefits of their chosen professions, and all was as it should be. After several years of adventuring, the party thought they where done, and ready to retire with their massive amounts of gold that of course weighed next to nothing. They had already slain several token dragons, liches, and the avatars of several minor gods, and they where ready to stop their active lifestyle and settle down. Jack in particular was ready to get himself hitched with the girl he'd met all the way back in the first town. Just as they where parting ways however, a stunned villager managed to find them and tell them how an evil wizard of unimaginable power in a distant land was tyrannizing his people. Now, Jack and his rougeish friend where chaotic neutral, and saw absolutely no benefit in going whatsoever, but do to the fact that the elven archer was Neutral Good and the paladin and cleric where both Lawful Good, the party decided to go off and free the poor peasants. Walking through fields of undead creatures, the cleric was racking up major experience points while the rest of the party walked alongside, quite bored. Finally, they reached the lair of the evil wizard, but even though Jack was one of the most powerful wizards in the world they still had to go through the wizard’s intricate system of caves and booby traps, his sewers, and into the bottom level of his dungeon. Here they met a big old red dragon. Now, red dragons where a dime a dozen for this group of adventurers, but this one was all chained up with special chains so it couldn’t just blast it’s way out of there. After freeing the creature, it promptly decided to eat the party. Jack quickly immobilized it. Stunned by Jack’s amazing good looks, the dragon bowed to Jack’s awesomeness and told him that the wizard specialized in a highly potent variety of polymorph spells. Jack allowed the creature to fly off relatively intact, and the party continued up the wizards tower. This wizard happened to the maker of one of those rather nasty dungeons with lots of complicated puzzles and the like, and didn’t leave much loot lying around either. It was rather depressing for the party, but they moved up and through the tower, resting every now and then. Finally, they reached the big bad wizard himself. Now, what our erstwhile group of adventurers didn’t know was that the dungeon master had been particularly cruel and given this wizard all sorts of special abilities, items, etc. The wizard, despite Jack’s efforts, quickly blasted his entire party to smithereens, but left Jack alive. Then, Being a mean old man, he polymorphed Jack into a wombat. He allowed Jack to retain all his wizardly powers and intelligence, but his polymorph spell was so powerful that Jack couldn’t break out of it. Jack was sad, but the wizard took some pity on him. After casting an uber raise dead spell on Jack’s former companions, he sent Jack off with a dimension door spell to the frozen tundra of the north. Jack was not aware of the deeply magical nature of his new form (not your ordinary wombat), but after moving south discovered his new innate magical powers closely connected to those of ice. Jack’s wombat form was almost constantly covered my snow or frost. The wizard who had turned Jack into a wombat once sought him out, and Jack promptly froze him and blew him up. This wombat form was far more potent than his old human body, and the DM had removed several of the wizard’s nastier powers. Jack raided the wizard’s library and then built his own little tower in the north, where he settled down amongst his books. He finally discovered the key to the polymorph spell the wizard had used on him, but decided not to change back to human form. The wombat form was far more comfortable, but Jack kept the spell for future use. Moving off to a land called Terra, Jack spent his time reincarnating from several different hells, and using massive armies of highly trained telemarketers to utterly destroy his opponents. Returning to his tower after a strange species of Mari Monkeys somehow disabled the ability to reincarnate, he found that all his gold was missing. The enigmatic FrozenWombat now wanders the land once more, and is sometimes seen leading a band of squirrel bandits across the land, searching for geld. To Be Continued The wombat put down his quill. He really was rather egotisical.

I'm a Co-Leader of a 10-person or so guild there.. We're keeping low-profile for the time being though.