Norman

Happy birthday darlin' friend of the bird is a friend of mine, Hope the day was a good one, and you had the fun that is deserving of such an ausicious occasion. -Norman

Scotch fillet lightly grilled and still rare, with a hint of pepper, and a mild chillie sauce. you know.. Steak.

Gently cut the swinging vine Use it as a rope, The noose around tightens neat And victim loses hope. Mark the quarters, strap the knife Slip it gently through the cloth Nail the pins to cure the skin Keep the bones for broth. (a bird of air and thermal waves)

Norman bowed deeply and tipped his hat to all. "It would appear that a hearty round of congratulations are in order" Norman wondered through the gathered group of promotees, bowing and shaking hands and slowly edged his way closer to the kitten Mynx moved. Norman suddenly stopped and turned to Ozymandias, "So this means I am no longer canon fodder, I am now a grunt?" Ozy Blinked at the comparison of ranking systems and nodded. "I suppose so" Norman smiled, "Well write on me and call me a page, I got promoted!" -Norman ooc: Congrats all, and thank you very much for the honour you have given to me.

Norman eyeballs the Lizardy thing that is questioning his poetic ability in a manner resembling a heckler. He contemplates making friends 'orcish style'. Norman's face lights up in a rather comical grin. "Orcish dance of frinedship, it is guv, good of you to ask, It is the dance of friendship see, as it normanlly ends in a good introducing of people to eachother and some good lasting frinedships being made and all, if you take my meaning." Norman pranced about, "The once was a sorta almost dragon, Who's schemes was as sound as a wagon that only had one wheel and missing boards in the spiel and he seemed a few pints short of a flagon." Norman stopped prancing and grinned at the Almost draconic elder.

With a few agile twists and a fair bit of climbing the small orc approached the girl that was in the rafters. He waved at the greetings from the air, and only at the last moment realised that they had indeed come from an owl. Norman paused, his small orc in a large orc tribe survival instincts whispered thoughts and possibilities to him in their little internal monologue. "That owl may be a useful assistant in kittenhunting,'not that I would hunt kittens', and the rafters seem safe-ish." The thoughts stopped as he realised that he was not leaning on a rafter anymore, Norman patted the strange knobbly thing at his shoulder height and wondered what sort of wood it was. Appy giggled, "Oi, that is my Knee silly!" Norman jumped, the rafters disappeared past his head as he fell, luckily orcs can land on their heads, it does the least amount of damage. Unfortunately his fall was broken by a small gathering of kittens. "Sorry 'bout that, didnt see you there!" he yelled up at the rafters and mentally included the kittens that seemed far to close for comfort. Orc hands do tend to operate on their own when there are things to pick up, and it took only a few seconds as Norman stood for one of them to grab on to the tail of one of the kittens. The rest pounced. If Norman had learned one thing, it was how to run from the middle of a scuffle. Norman detached himself from the living fur coat as he tried in vain to avoid the gaze of Mynx, his tattered appearance rappidly becoming kittenscratched and torn too. "Sorry luv, nice kitty, no harm done now, just leaving like I said, no need to get up there." The scene was beginning to resemble a tornado of fur, with a bowler hat. "Oi leggo, get off me, ow, help, that's m' ear, ow, get off it, help, heeellp!!" Crypt faught the laughter long enough to get a comment out, "relax Norman, they just trying to make friends with you!" Norman began to climb the wall to escape, dripping kittens as he slowly gained height and extracted himself from the pool of fur. He looked down at the kittens clawing at the wall and glanced at Mynx. The last kitten still had a death grip on his ear and was chewing, "Ok, ok you had your fun, now call them off will you? Please? I dont think a fur earring is a good look in this day and all." The kitten let go and landed with the rest, as orcish hands dragged a kittenscratched Norman to the rafters once more. He smiled at Appy, "Well, 'ello, Um Sorry about all that, You play poker do you? Blackjack? what game you have in mind then?"

Mynx flinched as a small drop of orc drool landed on one of her kitten minion's head.

"Sorry Luv, no offence intended, just playing with the lil scamp, no harm done now was there?" Norman began his assent of the table again, "I suppose it a good indication that there is no kitten huntin to be had in this place, not that I would ever think of spitroasting a feline of any sort mind." Norman shifted to the furthest edge of the table, away from Mynx, and watched the gathering kittens longingly before snapping out of it at the sound of Mynx's low growl. "Right you are luv, see, not chasing them none an I, just looking, no harm done." As a whispered aside to Crypt, that was heard quite clearly by Mynx, "that dye job given her the same temperment too, if you take my meaning." Grinning disarmingly at Mynx, Norman shifted uncomfortably as he realised this was not going in his favour, "Um, we start over then shall we, Pretend like we never met and I just arrived and all, and we didnt get into no barney at the party that yous two crashed, although it a good thing you did as it sorta made the party and all that, but we just now met, and.... " Norman stumbled in his attempts to restart the introduction, the flick of Mynx's tail was a rather obvious threat in a distinctly feline sort of way, and the kittens seemed to be preventing most of the normal means of escape. "Hi, I am Norman the Runt, and I believe I was just on my way to someplace else that I had to be, in order to fullfill a previous engagement with someone not looking like a warmer, angrier, more-inclined-to-disembowel-me-with-her-scythe, version of Death itself." Norman threw a small grappling hook that had been hastily palmed and scampered up the rope to the roof, and dissappeared into the rafters.

Norman wondered if it would be polite to aquire one of the kittens, and if he had a spit big enough to roast it on. He turned his attention to the larger feline in the robe. "Well, like I said, don't I know you?" The orc scaled the chair and clambered onto the table. "Well I never, it is the blonde from the party. I must say you look quite fetching as a red, but the other outfit did work for you better, you didnt half scare the death out of me in that robe an' all." Norman watched the kittens again. "Anyways, I am Norman the Runt, pleased to meet you again luv, always good to have more than one friend close at hand."

Norman watched the scene unfold, he noticed Whiskey wisely move to a safer haven of a table away from the ducks. Movement around the room was hindered by a flood of rubber quackers, the diminutive orc scaled the walls and after some rather agile manoevering managed to end up on the table beside Whiskey. "Is this place crazy or just quackers?" Norman grinned, "Sorry, 'scuse the wordplay, it good to break the ice, mind you there enough flow of things in here already." "Anyhow, Hi, I believe I am newer than you, but it be good to introduce oneself proper like, if you take my meaning." Norman bowed, "Pleased to meet you, Norman the Runt, It is my pleasure to make your aquaintence." ooc: Hi *waves*

The pale complexion of amost suffocated orc faded to the even paler more 'healthy' pallor of a orc once more able to breath more than paper. Norman watched his application receive its stamp of acceptance, smiled and bowed low in thanks to the large, and truely awe inspiring, business minded, reptilian, elder type gentleman, with the dexturous tail. "Thanks Guv, I am truely honoured that someone of your obvoius talents and business skills, would stoop to my low level, 'scuse the pun, to accept my humble and sincere application." "I hope that the paperwork that moved wont cause much imbalance in your picturesque office scenery, it would be remiss of me not to worry about the repeat of the incident with the avalanch, that of cause didnt happen, to happen, if you take my meaning." Norman backed toward the door and slipped it a fiver to keep the sorting and shifting of certain documents under its hinges, thanked the Almost Draconic Elder for his acceptance one final time, and dashed back to the secure sanctuary of the caberet room, to 'read'. ooc: Thank you Wyvern for the wonderful acceptance of my application, I look forward to roleplaying further with you too, and hopefully find enough inspiration to write something worthwhile.

Wondering through the gnome garden Norman tries to restrain himself from mass gnomicide, he never did recall the cutlural differences in gnomes and orcs being resolved at any stage. Noticing people adding objects to the garden collection gave him an idea. It took several hours, a large vat of plaster, some careful mounlding, and a bucket of off-green paint, but finally he managed to finish his addition, a small orc statuette, with a large club, standing behind every gnome he could find that wouldnt take offence at the addition of an attacking orc to its 'look'.

There once was a Crypto named mancer Who fancied himself an orcish dancer His footwork was faulty But he knew how to party As I recall he even made friends with the bouncer.

Norman wondered through the piles of paper littering the floor, walls, tables, chairs and anything else that made up the room that Wyvern was meant to be in, but obviously wasnt. He was rather surprised at the many rather incriminating documents that seemed to be misplaced in the chaos that was the recruiters office. The orcish cunning and survival instincts of a small orc in a large orc tribe came to the fore front of Norman's mind. Norman walked out onto a balcony of paperwork just above Wyverns desk, and sat down in thought, before beginning his letter of introduction. Greetings to the most esteemed Wyvern, Please honour me with a response to my humble yet honest application. I am ever grateful to you for the consideration that you shall give, to my document of application and introduction. My name is Norman, Norman the Runt. I am of orcish decent, and humbly request entry to this wonderful place of residence. In return I shall offer my services to remove certain documents from the easily accessible piles, and file them in a location that would be of a more secure nature, thereby preventing the detection of your diverse business dealings, from those that may missunderstand the intentions of your business accumen. I hope that we can come to a mutually benificial arrangement, and as a token of my good intentions I have already filed some of your more interesting paperwork in a special location, situated in the wooden panelling of a desk, away from prying eyes, if you take my meaning. Please direct all requests for further services to myself at your earliest convienence, and I look forward to the acceptance of my most humble application. Yours in the utmost good faith, Norman the Runt, Orcish Businessman. Norman went back to browsing the paper work that formed the bulk of the rooms contents, aquiring copies of the more interesting ones and filing them in a 'secure location' situated in a desk, however, not specifically the desk in Wyvern's office.

"Wardrobe? that be a suit fit for a chief to me, and I take your jest well in the height department, just keep those type of comments to a minimum or we shalln't be seeing eye to eye much, if you take my meaning." Norman let off a burst of almost machine gun laughter, that stopped as suddenly as it began, "Wyvern? Respectable name that, I shall go see him directly, well after we share a cuppa it seems." Norman sipped the coffee, "Got a spot of sugar ther Guv?" Crypt drew a rune on the cup, and the contents swirled. Norman sipped it and smiled, "that hit the spot, nice trick that, mind teaching me it someday?"

Norman beamed, as much as green teeth in a greenish skinned small orc can that is. "Stay? Here? Well I never! Blow me down and call me slimey! That has to be the kindest suggestion anyone ever made to me, hats off to you Guv, honest and true, I would be happy to stay." Norman leaned in and whispered, "See, I want to look around here a bit and make some new associates, in the business side of thing see. I have a knack for spotting a good deal, and organising the right people to meet at the right time, namely me meeting them when they is least suspecting it see, and I know there is a lizard type gentleman here with a similar sort of business mind to myself." Leaning back Norman grinned and announced to the room in general, "Well I never, seems the Lads had you lot pinned all wrong, I would love to stay and partake in your culture for a spell, not too long mind, wouldn't want to out stay my welcome and become an imposition on you all. But stay I shall, and I thank you very kindly for the gesture of welcome and kindness. You mind if I take residence with you then Guv? seeing as yours was the invite and all?"

"Well, see, the lads wanted to thank you and invite you for another visit see. Just, they is just a bit uncertain of the welcome from your archers and all on the keep walls. See we dont always manage to bridge the cutlural gaps with you, um, paler folk, if you take my meaning." Norman sat on the table cross legs and rested on his hands. "Seems I got the task of doing what I am good at like, and sneaking in to find you, and since I already thanked you for your kind invitation to be friends, it was sorta a fore gone conclusion that they would send me, being as we are such good friends and all."

"Oh! Pardon my manners sir! Dreadfully sorry, Norman, Norman the Runt, Please to meet you again formal like that is. Your skills in understanding Orcish culture still astound me, and all the lads really too. See we all had the best party we had in a long time, and see the thing that made it all so good party like was you , and the blonde, quite an outstanding bridge of the culture gap if I say so myself."

"Good one Guv, playing the whole 'I dont remember' card are we? Let me give you a quick refresher then." I theatrical jump and pose ended with Norman standing tip of ears to eye level with Crypt, he stood on tiptoes, and reached an almost eye to eye level. "Party, good party, got better when you showed with the blonde in the tight mini and all that. As I recall rather fondly mind, you understood the finer points of the diverse culture of us more clan orientated folk. Made many a friend that night you did, mind, not many got a chance to thank you properly, 'cept me you see, got me a nice chair leg and fixed to thank you for your invitation of friendship."

Tipping his bowler hat, well the top half of the hat (the bottom remains fixed around his head below his ears), he grins at the gathering crowd. "Well, 'ello you lot, pleased to be making your aquaintance then, pleased to be made welcome in a place of such honerable company." Looking himself up and down, he then fixes his gaze at the painting, "Um, what do you mean tattered? this is my best business suit, on account of me being here to conduct some business with my good friend in the hood, if you take my meaning. Now if you will excuse us, I shall appreciate some quiet for me and my good friend here." He smiles at the others and gestures to Crypt.