Finnius Posted April 10, 2003 Report Share Posted April 10, 2003 "Yui-chan, of course I...," was as far as the little blue man got before a large plate of steaming somethingorother and a sheef of paper were quite politely placed into his field of vision. Giving half a glance backwards over his left shoulder, and trembling with antici..............plagiarism; Finnius catches two-and-three-quarters glances of Peredhil. (Which is quite good for only half a glance. The glance, feeling over-wrought, promptly collapses on the floor.) But before our tired and travailed traveler can properly respond, he's knocked off his feet by a swarm of little purple fuzzits. And one large puppy. "Canid? Wha?! And I thought you had been talented before... but this... this is just... Waitaminute. You... bowed?" Shocked beyond belief at this display of canine acrobatics, the bewildered indigo semi-mage nearly misses Gwaihir's Wiggly Cabbages and the innane (Did I miss an 'S?') Lord of the Gay. But alas and forsooth, the biggest, greenest shock is yet to come. "Finnius! This is one heck of a pleasant surprise! I'm very glad to see that you've managed to return to writing and have found the Mighty Pen," rumbles the voice of many a poor mage's financial ruin. A somewhat-scaled and almost dragonic claw then inserts a glass of what is possibly the only liqour Finnius does not imbibe on a regular basis into his hand. "Sorry to hear you've been through some hard times... It seems your quality of writing hasn't changed in the slightest... it remains excellent!" "Errr... thanks... who are you again?" An eye already the size of a well-ripened apple widens to comic proportions, then shrinks again, as Wyvern laughs. And for an instant, thinks the little blue bard, I had him fooled. So off hustles the party, or entourage, or whatever; into the Recruiting Office. All settle into their big comfy chairs, the little purple fuzz-balls disappear, and we once again gather 'round the fire for a tale. Only this time there's no fire-place. -------------------------------------------- Finn's First Love, A yarn of college romance... ...or, How to Whip a Dead Horse It happened towards the end of my freshman year at the Terran Institute of Miraculous Events that I meant a young she-person. This person was in my Liberal Arts and Philosophy course, which meant that we had lots of free time. As anyone knows, philosophy is pretty much a bum class, useful for sounding nice and teaching Philosophy, but not much else. In any case, we'd both went to the same high school, but had never really met until now, mainly because she'd had the good sense to run when Mr. Toknonnen had burst, in all his Unholy Glory, from the gym room floor at graduation day. But that's a different story. It was good to see that some of my old school memories were still around, though, even if I didn't exactly remember them; so I made myself available. It didn't hurt much that she was a stone-cold fox either. ------------------------------------------- Peredhil shifts a bit in his chair, and very un-rudely clears his throat. The diminutive aqua storyteller then grins a bit and addresses him. "Yes, Pered? Do you have a question?" "Not to interupt, but... aren't you leaving something out? Something... important?" Finnius chuckles and turns a somewhat uncharacteristic shade of violet. "Like a name? Well, if I must. Gods forgive me for this but... *sigh it was...," at which the little blue mage makes a gargled sound, like a chicken choking on a frog-leg; and points towards none other than Yui Temai. There's an awkward moment of silence, shattered by raucous, almost dragonic guffawing coupled with a little scandalized "Hmph," from Yui-chan. "Not that we ever... dated... or...," begins Finn, trying to take a stiff drink of Bruteweiser while simultaneously explaining the situation. "It was more of a... like a..." "You had a crush on me?!" The inept adept hangs his head in his little blue hands and softly mumbles, "Thanks for bringing that up Pered, consider us even for me telling all those high-school stories about your girl-of-the-week." And out loud; "Could I please continue?" Peredhil the Impeccably Polite snickers and motions for the story to continue. ------------------------------------------------- Anyway, Yui was good to talk to during the long hours between rantings. She always had interesting views on whatever our topic might be, and never really managed to insult anyone while disagreeing. How was I not to become a bit smitten? So one night I tried to ask her out. The conversation went something like this: Me: Hi, Yui, what's up? Yui: Oh, Finn, guess what? I just met the the greatest guy! And I think he might like me, too! Could you do me just the teeeeeeensiest favor? Me: Errrm... yeahiguess... Yui: Just talk to him, y'know, find out for sure, ok? Me: Absolutely... There was a little more, but you get the idea. Anyway, I spent the next week getting to know this "guy" for Yui. He wasn't too bad, and no I can't remember who he was, all right Pered? It turned out he was interested, so I relayed the information to Yui and withdrew my attentions. I've never been one to stick around where I'm not wanted, after all. Shortly after, I switched my courses to Creative Spell-casting, at which I managed to fail miserably. Never did get the hang of all that on-the-fly mana handling. ---------------------------------- The room stays quiet for a moment, some contemplating the story, others contemplating their navels. For his part, Finnius takes another stiff drink and puts out the carpet-fire. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gyrfalcon Posted April 10, 2003 Report Share Posted April 10, 2003 *blink blink blink* Finnius stared out at the crowd, a slowly-growing nervous expression on his face. "Well...?" he ventured finally. The room exploded in applause and cheering! OOC: Welcome back, Finnius- it's good to see you at the Pen finally. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peredhil Posted April 10, 2003 Report Share Posted April 10, 2003 Peredhil thinks about laughing and applauding, but looking at Yui-chan, and catching a rare glimpse of her Aegon behind her, managed to keep a reasonable straight face. Excuse me, he stands, I've got to step out for a moment. It is a testimony to centuries of control that he makes it out the door and down the hallway before the laughter wells irrepressably... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Finnius Posted April 11, 2003 Author Report Share Posted April 11, 2003 Another installment of my application process: The Truth About Magic Not being the most talented mage in Terra, and not really being able to accomplish anything greater than occasionally setting a rug on fire; one begins to ask oneself if this "Magick" stuff is actually real. So I decided to ask several well-known mages for their opinions, and the results were quite startling. I present them to you in chronological order. First, Wyvern: The scene is just outside the Pen's Recruiting office, where Wyv, true to form, is shaking down an old lady for her grandson's lunch money, while somehow managing to come off as a charming gentle-creature, so as not to upset her. F: Hey, Wyvern, how's things? (Notice how the reporter eases his subject with a little small talk.) W: Wha? *Drops Old Lady. Oh, it's you... hey, could you do me a little favor? See, I'm a tad strapped for cash, and since you haven't paid your membership dues yet... F: Umm... *Tries to remember the Old Wyvern; promptly forgets. Sure, what do you need, three, four thousand geld? I might be able to spot you a little, assuming you'll pay me back. W: Oh, of course, of course! *Extends scaled claw, takes money. Thanks a heap, this should just about cover my boo... I mean, the Pen's... umm... paper inventory! Yeah, paper. F: No problem. Hey, could I ask you a few questions about magic? W: Love to help you out; gotta run. Can I take a rain check? F: I guess... This conversation led me to believe two things: 1. Either Wyvern's brushed up on his Mind Alteration, or 2. That I am a tremendous fool. I believe the evidence speaks for itself. On to the next interview, Gyrfalcon: The scene is the interior of a large stone sitting room, lined wall-to-wall with shelves of various tomes, elixers, etc. Many and varied weapons sit in decorative positions in glass cabinets, all polished to razor sharp sheens. Gyrfalcon reclines in a comfortable red velvet armchair, Finnius sits cross-legged on the floor. F: *Squirms. So, Gyr, I was wondering if you could answer a few questions for me? (Note the lack of small talk, as it did not work with Wyvern.) G: What?!! No 'hello,' no 'Hey Gyrfalcon, how's life been?' *Sighs. Really, I expected more. But fine, go on, ask away. F: Umm... sorry. Anyway, I was wondering how you would go about, oh say, creating matter from nothing. G: ... G: Well, first you need to prepare your work area, tools, formulae and such, and then you would cast the appropriate spell, depending on what you wanted to create. F: Of course, but how exactly does one cast a spell? Aside from the tomes and powders and bric-a-brac? G: I think I see what you're getting at, and I'll do my best to explain. *Motions for servants to bring in sevaral chalk boards. The rest of that week was spent puzzling over numbers, abstract ideas, and concepts so ludicrous that this reporter was loath to try them. Try them he did, however, and at the end of the week, all he was able to do was make his brain hurt from exhaustion. Gyrfalcon, for his part was quite patient. He only hit me twice; once to demonstrate the radical shift in perception necessary to perform feets of sorcery, and once because I broke an antique vase while practicing levitation. I flew quite a good distance however, so it might have worked. Or maybe he was just really mad. In any case, I came to the following conclusions: 1. Under the correct circumstances, anyone can be taught to fly, 2. The correct circumstances usually involve breaking something, and then trying to run as fast as possible, and 3. Chalk is evil. My third and final destination was Peredhil: The scene is a comfortable gazebo, secluded in a copse of trees. The remnants of a meal adorn a small, but elegant, hardwood table. Peredhil, having fed his little blue friend far past capacity, is beginning to look a bit worried about the unseemly bulge in Finnius' dark violet robes. A fuzzball, camoflauged in the hem of our reporter's sleeve forlornly looks for its cohorts. In the distance, a wolf howls. F: urp... Excuse me, Pered. What a wonderful dinner! But truly, it wasn't necessary. I was wondering if maybe you could help me out with something, just a little project I've been working on. (Notice the subtle way the chit-chat leads into a request for information. Our reporter has learned his lessons well!) P: But, of course, chum! Oh, wait, you seem to have one of Canid's fuzzies trapped in your sleeve. *Gently removes the odd little creature, dusts it off. Why you must have been stuck in there for days! Poor thing, it must be famished, here, have some leftover blueberry pie. *Begins feeding. F: *Clears throat. Pered? My question? P: Oh, yes, go on. F: What would you say is the most important aspect of the casting process of any good spell? The most fundamental principle of magic, so to speak. P: *Thinks for a moment, feeds more blueberry pie to the fuzzle. Just be yourself. F: That's it. Just be yourself. P: *Nods. At this point, a largeish canine head emerges from the bushes and swings towards Peredhil. Pered, recognizing Canid, waves her over, returns the fuzzy critter, and offers rest and food to all. Our reporter accepts, as does the lupine Verdant-par-excellance, and revelry commences. Which leads me to the following, final, conclusions: 1. While I was not able to specifically ascertain the truth behind magic, I was able to bum free lodging off two out of three of my interviewees. And what could be more magical than free stuff? 2. Wyvern was not one of those two, leading me to believe that some laws of the Universe cannot be broken. Gyr and Pered are basically decent, giving folks, whereas Wyv is a little more... self-oriented. 3. Magic, if it does exist, is more a flexing of the afore-mentioned rules, rather than an outright breaking of them, as demonstrated by Wyvern's ability to get me to loan him money, even though it was somewhat out of character. Hey, at least it was for a good cause, right? The Pen can always use more parchment... 4. The Basic Laws of the Universe might be a good Part Three to my application, but I must get some rest before attempting to interpret them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gyrfalcon Posted April 11, 2003 Report Share Posted April 11, 2003 Gyrfalcon laughed and then looked abashed. "Sorry about hitting you like that Finnius, I know I shouldn't have done that." he glanced over at where the purple fuzzies were slowly reconstructing the vase. "On the other hand, I paid the purple fuzzies to spend some time repairing the vase." Canid raised a furry brow and looked amazed. "How'd you manage that?" she asked. "I told them that the vase would be more valuable in its original state and that I'd pay them hansomely if they returned it to that state." Canid's eyes narrowed as she looked at Gyrfalcon. "You're planning to double-cross them somehow, aren't you?" Gyrfalcon laughed. "Of course! But it's fair." Finnius interjected himself into the conversation. "How?" Gyrfalcon grinned. "Because they're planning to double-cross me." he explained. Finnius just shook his blue head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Big Pointy One Posted April 13, 2003 Report Share Posted April 13, 2003 Finnius is back The Big Pointy One will cheer; Haiku Master's here! (Good to see you here, Finn! Hopefully we'll see you and your haikus, and all your other great stuff a lot in the time to come! ^.^) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wyvern Posted April 26, 2003 Report Share Posted April 26, 2003 Finnius patiently waits for Wyvern in his applicant easychair as weeks pass by and cobwebs begin to gather... The overgrown lizard's absence is extended to the extent that the seasons actually change as the blue man waits, the weather outdoors slowly turning from cold and rainy to bright and sunny. By the time the overgrown lizard finally walks into the entrance of the Recruiter's Office, the poor applicant has become covered in a thick layer of dust and has several creaky limbs... Swiftly striding into the room and tipping a tattered top hat that he had found laying in a garbage bin during his extensive scheming travels, Wyvern happily greets Finnius and suddenly notices that the blue applicant is covered in a variety of dusts and cobwebs. Sighing to himself and thoroughly apologizing to Finnius for the excruciatingly long wait he had to endure, Wyvern grabs Melba's feather duster from a nearby desk and quickly dusts the Patron Saint of Haikus off. Noticing that this has little effect on the many layers of dust covering the blue man, Wyvern grumbles and takes out a dustbuster vacuum cleaner, vacuuming around Finnius in an attempt to get rid of all the dirt. Having finished this, the overgrown lizard is dismayed to find that several cobwebs still remain, and is about to rush off to get a toilet plunger for some serious clean-up business when Finnius suddenly signals to Wyv with a creaky hand, not wanting to risk the overgrown lizard departing from the office again... Wyvern nods to this and immediatly gets to his office desk, shoving several dusty magasines off of it as he finds Finnius' application and reads over it several times. Grinning to himself as he reads over Finnius' piece on magic inquiries for the fifth time, Wyvern turns to the haiku master and exclaims: "First, let me apologize for not having had time to respond to your questions about magic earlier. That little old lady I was mug-errr... questioning had... well... had stolen some money from an innocent child! Yeah, that's it! And I was trying to get it back so I could buy the child some candy and then steal the candy from the baby, like I always do..." Suddenly realizing that the latter part of his argument doesn't work in his favor, Wyvern stops short and considers it for a moment as Finnius shakes his head in amusement... Wyvern certainly hadn't gotten any better at forming lies... "Anyhow..." mutters the greedy lizard, clearing his throat of a few ashes "I can now demonstrate to you a few of the processes of magic, if you're still interested... I'm a bit rusty, but can always try..." "Hmmmm..." murmers Finnius, having forgotten Wyvern's level of skill in the magical arts and uncertain if he'd want to take the risk of testing them out. Unfortunatly, before Finnius has time to object, the reptilian Elder has begun the demonstration... "Magic is largely based around two thingssss..." hisses the lizard "luck and a bit of good ol' memorization. Lessee here... for example, if you want to cast a Blaze spell..." Wyvern waves his hands around a bit and mumbles some arcane jargon to himself quietly. Then, suddenly, two starving peasants appear out of thin air, a rainbow color fills the room, and Wyvern rockets upward towards the office ceiling in a sudden jet of air. After colliding with the ceiling, the overgrown lizard dizzily falls back down to the earth before being beaten down by the two peasants for not feeding them enough... Finnius watches all of this while chuckling under his breath, wondering how the overgrown lizard had managed to accidentaly cast a "Summon Starving Peasant" spell, a "Cantrip" spell, and a "Flight" spell all at the same time... After the reptilian Elder has recovered himself and has managed to remove the starving peasants desperatly clinging to his scaly legs, he stamps Finnius' application ACCEPTED and happily hands the blue man a little sheet that reads: The Basic Laws of the Universe According to Wyvern: 1) Geld rules over all. 2) All things will eventually dissolve and aid the development of geld. 3) Every living being expresses a certain degree of greed. 4) Geld really does rule over all. ;-) OOC: An ACCEPTED application hands down Finnius, glad you could make it over to the Pen! I'm definitely looking forward to reading more of your stuff, and apologize once again for my extremely late application response. Be sure to either post your e-mail address here or mail me at elitwack90@hotmail.com, so that I can send you a bit more Pen info. Once again, welcome! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Finnius Posted April 30, 2003 Author Report Share Posted April 30, 2003 "Errrrmmm," begins a sentence, which quickly realizes that 'errrmm' is not technically a begininng, so much as an expression of hesitance. The sentence then gets to the point, that being, "Why Wyv, thanks for the dusting, and for the speedy, although somewhat premature, acceptance." Having completed itself, the sentence proceeds from the little blue lips of a little blue man, realizing only at the last second that it has far too many commas, and should correct itself. The little blue man, for his part, tries to look a bit embarassed for the sentence, but only ends up turning purple. "Hey, nice color change," replies Wyvern, "is that something you picked up from Peredhil?" "...," quips Finnius, not quite over the shody one-line literary device. "Hey, good Mr. Bunny impression! You should take that on the road, maybe add a few more, you could make millions!" A sly look materializes on Wyv's face. "I could be your agent, (and cheap at only fifty, no better make that sixty percent.)" "Thanks, but no." Our indigo protagonist glances at the starving peasents, who are starting to share glances in his direction, and realizing that, as Little Blue Man Under Glass has already been on the menu once, Finnius couldn't be that bad. Also, he's probably a bit more tender than almost-dragon. "Terribly sorry, must be going. Still, thanks 'n'all." ---------------------------------------- Outside the recruiting office, Finnius stops to catch his breath, and remove the remaining dust from his person. After having cleaned up appropriately, our little blue mage heads over to the Tavern of the Quill, where he proceeds to buy a round of scotch for all. OOC: Sorry about the long delay, work got baaaaad. Anyway, I'm still working on the Basic Laws of the Universe. Up to 14, and still going strong. That will, of course, be posted as soon as possible, but not before it's finished. (Or is that Finnished?) Also, seeing as you requested it, my e-mail address is ninja_bob212@yahoo.com; send me as much as you wish. I like's the mail! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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