emilycch Posted March 2, 2008 Report Share Posted March 2, 2008 Life on Mars? (Mary-Anne hocks a swell of phlegm out the car window) I bought a new set of bed sheets last Monday- took a couple of hours off work to pop down the shopping centre. I just don't know how people manage choosing between ivory and pearl - and one must always consider white as well, of course. I held the potentials up to a faux-column in the DIY section just to check I was aiming at the right sort of faux-decadence. Can't go wrong with white, you know. not in the bedroom at least. It just screams 'clean sophistication!' and since you never know when a Guest might chance upon it, it's so important to always Be Prepared, certainly in the bedroom, of course. No, I'm glad I put a couple of hours into it. Took some time off work, you see. The trouble with today is, people just underestimate the importance of first impressions - I know people who've suffered exclusion from Neighborhood Dinner Parties after they bought such vibrant table cloths that Cherie from number 42 had a small stroke. i mean, some people just don't see how crucial linen is and certainly in the Bedroom, of all places - absolutely crucial. One never knows, you see. I mean, there are starving people out there, and one doesn't want anyone thinking that we may be one of them, and not seeing the right accessories can really leave a bad taste in a Guest's mouth - especially in the bedroom. Of all places! no, no, I think I should have taken longer, if anything. One never can take too much time. Not in the bedroom, at least. Certainly not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
reverie Posted March 8, 2008 Report Share Posted March 8, 2008 (edited) Did this begin as a song for you? I mean did you sing it as you wrote it? Honestly I have to put it into a kind of 80s or a bluesy country type thing to hear it as poem. This is not an insult, but as presented it reads more like prose to me than as poem unless I try to superimpose a song on it. Suggestion: If you begin it as a song, try saying it slowly to yourself (don't sing it, we can't hear the same tune as you), and then break your lines where it feels natural or where you would pause in your spoken phrase. Don't worry about meter or rhythm or making all the line lengths line up to a similar length -- those do not matter as much as the natural flow or pacing of one line leading into another. take care, rev... Edited March 8, 2008 by reverie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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