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The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

Death Becomes Yui


Wyvern

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- 6:00 AM -

 

*Tap tap, knock* "Pssssst... hey-"

 

Yui-chan shifts under the shaded sheets of her beautiful four-poster bed, whispering softly to herself as her peaceful sleep envelopes her in dreams of open fields, soft beds of roses, and the gentle touch of her lover Aegon. Her dream seems to reach the height of its perfection as a soft Summer breeze channels its way across the hills and plains, causing a light rain of flower petals and sunshine to fall from the sky. Countless songbirds chirp harmoniously in unison, each sounding lovely in its own way: the larks, the wrens, the mockingbirds, the magpies, the shrikes, the... mongoose?

 

"Knock knock." squacks the mongoose oddly, diverting the attention of the dream couple from their passionate romance. "Knock knock!"

 

Yui-chan stares at the mongoose in puzzled concern as Aegon draws a blade to take care of the distraction, only to jump back as the sounds of hunter shots ring through the air.

 

*Bang, bang!*

 

Yui suddenly jumps awake in bed, sitting up as her eyes flutter open in shock.

 

"Bang, bang, bang-crack*

 

The sleepy huntress quickly comes to terms with her familiar sleeping quarter surroundings, and immediately turns her head towards the source of the sound. She breaths in a sharp gasp and instinctively pulls the sheets of the bed over her nightgown as she notices Wyvern sitting at her windowsill, frozen and staring into the chamber, his right claw glued into a motionless knocking position next to a new crack in the otherwise-beautiful glass window. Staying frozen in place as Yui clutches her bed sheets tightly and stares at him in bewilderment, the overgrown lizard gradually inches his fist away from the spot where the crack now rests on the window, then settles back into stiffened immobility.

 

Yui pauses and shuts her eyes to concentrate for a moment, then turns towards a clock next to her bed and makes out that the hands read 6 AM. Turning her attention back to Wyvern sitting outside of her window, Yui tightens the security of the blanket wrapped over her nightgown and half-whispers:

 

"Wyvern?"

 

Upon hearing the sound of his name, Wyvern quickly unstiffens and loosens up, breathing a short sigh of relief as he hisses back:

 

"Good morning, Yui-chan. Rise n shine, let's get started on our date."

 

Yui-chan pauses and stares at Wyvern blankly. After a long moment of silence, she mutters:

 

"Wyv, don't you think it's a little bit early to start a date?"

 

Wyvern smiles a toothy grin, then answers:

 

"It's never too early for us to start our date, Yui-chan. Besides, you paid good money for me in that auction, regardless of my never getting the chance to sign up, and I want to make you get every coppers worth of it."

 

Yui sighs and brushes a hand through her tangled blond hair, yawning before turning her head to the lizard and muttering:

 

"Alright, fine. Just give me a bit of time to get dressed and prepared and I'll meet you downstairs in a bit... but only because I know you've been looking forward to this."

 

Wyvern grins and performs a miniature victory dance from his spot on the windowsill, then settles back into his previous position and continues staring into the chamber. Yui stares back at the lizard blankly, tapping a foot on the ground patiently before finally muttering:

 

"Ummm, Wyvern?"

 

"Yes Yui?"

 

"When I said that I wanted time to get dressed and prepared, I meant that I wanted time to get dressed and prepared in privacy."

 

"Oh.... eheheheh" stutters Wyvern as he turns to the tree he had used to climb up to Yui's windowsill, silently cursing at another peeping strategy gone down the drain. "Right, of course."

 

As Wyvern begins clinging to the tree next to the window for his descent, Yui-chan manages to get a clearer sight of the crack that he made in the window, and raises a brow as she says:

 

"Say Wyvern, before you head down... you wouldn't happen to be the one that made that crack in the window, would you?"

 

"Errrr" mutters Wyvern nervously, half-turning his head towards Yui and lightly biting his lower lip. "Uhhh, no, of course not. I think it was Celes Crusadors cat, Carbone... yeah, I know I saw her here just a few minutes ago."

 

Yui folds her arms over the blanket area covering her chest and frowns, brushing a strand of blond hair from her face and tapping her foot on the ground as the overgrown lizard begins climbing down the tree. The huntresses eyes widen in disbelief as she watches Carbone pounce onto Wyverns head from the top of the tree, knocking Wyvern over and causing him to fall and careen into a few branches before eventually crashing into a bush of brambles that rests at the ground below. She can't help but break into a little smile as the lizards misfortune, shaking her head and giggling at Carbone's revenge as she begins preparing herself for a long day out with an Almost Dragon.

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- 6:30 AM -

 

Wyvern brushes the last of the brambles and thorns from his dark tunic, shaking a fist in the direction of the nearby window that Carbone had escaped through and grumbling to himself glumly. Leaning back against the tree he had fallen from and jingling a few silver pieces in his pocket, the overgrown lizard perks up and grins as Yui quietly exits from her quarters, sporting her usual ebon cloak and tunic combo. Noticing Wyvern standing by the tree, Yui looks the reptilian Elder over from head to toe in a mixture of curiousity and distaste, mingled with a hint of caution and a pinch of fear. The overgrown lizard wears a black vest over a black tunic, with black breeches and black gloves, along with a black backpack and a black hood.

 

"Hi Wyvern." Yui whispers, aware of the early hour and not wanting to awaken any sleeping Pen members. "You certainly look dark this morning... are you advertising gothic products, or is this just a special occasion?"

 

"A special occasion, of course." hisses Wyvern back, winking slyly and signalling Yui to follow him as he begins walking through the Pen's courtyards. "Besides, I was wearing it in a recent business endeavor and didn't have much time to change. It should be very useful for our morning activities, anyway."

 

"Activities?" Yui frowns as she wanders closer to Wyvern, sniffing at the air and suddenly noticing that the lizard reeks of the scent of vanilla. "You aren't planning any schemes involving shadows, are you?"

 

"Of course not." hisses Wyvern softly, smiling to himself as he begins approaching the area outside of the Cabaret room, near where Merelas had set up and hosted his Pen Fashion Show. Yui pauses in her tracks a moment as they get closer to the familiar area, quietly muttering:

 

"Wyvern, where are we headed exactly?"

 

Wyvern pauses, then points a scaly claw towards the place that was used for the Pen Fashion Show.

 

"To start off our date, I thought I'd do a brief errand here at the Fashion Show area to pick up that formal gown that you so *ahem* amply showed off during the event. You can even wear it later-"

 

"Wyvern." interrupts Yui, crossing her arms over her chest and tapping her right foot on the ground. "You know you'd never be able to afford a dress like that, and I doubt they're even selling any yet."

 

"Who said anything about buying it?" snickers Wyvern, winking at Yui and motioning with his head to follow along. "We're just renting it for the day, without paying anything... when noone's supervising it at 6:30 in the morning."

 

Yui-chan frowns.

 

"Is that why you woke me up so early? I don't think I'll be able to support your stealing products from Merelas, Wyv. He put a great deal of effort into creating them, you know."

 

"Awwwww." whines Wyvern in disappointment, his eyes going wide and glassy. "I'm not stealing the product, I'm just renting it for zero geld when there happens to be nobody around. Pleeeeaaaaaasssssse Yui? You look soooo good in it, I swear."

 

Yui hesitates for a moment, caught by Wyvern's innocent puppydog eye expression and blushing slightly at the lizards final comment.

 

"Well, if it's only being rented..."

 

"Great!" exclaims Wyvern, brashly grabbing Yui by the hand and breaking his innocent demeanor in the process. The overgrown lizard sprints the rest of the way to the outdoor area surrounding the Pen Fashion Show chambers, dragging Yui along with him until he eventually reaches the wall next to the locked gates of the quarters. The reptilian Elder then quickly fishes through his black backpack for a cheap mask of Imposter, which he sloppily tosses over his face. Turning to Yui-chan and clasping his claws together in the best pleading position he can muster, the poorly-disguised lizard softly hisses:

 

"Ssssay Yui, could you maybe create a shadow rift in this wall so I can get into the show area the smooth way? I don't wanna waste too much time snooping around here, since I'd like to spend most of the day with you."

 

Yui sighs and rolls her eyes, then pauses for a moment as she makes a small entryway into the building by means of the early morning shadows spotting the wall.

 

"No shadow schemes indeed... Hurry up, alright?"

 

"Thanksss so much." hisses Wyvern gleefully, moving towards the shadow rift and stepping into it. "Stay right here, I'll be back in a minute. Trust me, you won't regret this, it's a 100% no-fail strategy."

 

Yui frowns at these last words as Wyvern disappears into the rift, leaning back against the wall and sighing to herself as she waits for his return. The huntresses frown deepens as, after several minutes of waiting, the first rays of sunlight fall upon the Pen Keep. As light washes over the walls where she rests, the Elder of Shadows finds it impossible to maintain her shadow rift escape route, which quickly dissipates. Yui cringes as she hears the sounds of cursing and crashing coming from within the building, and quietly rubs her forehead as the voice of a bouncer shouts "stop that imposter!" She waits for several minutes as the sounds of a chase can be heard faintly from within, until finally Wyvern is tossed out of the second floor window of the building by a bouncer, and crashlands head first a few feet away from Yui-chan.

 

Shaking her head and smirking a bit, Yui wanders over to Wyvern to give him a hand and help him to his feet as she murmers:

 

"You never learn, do you?"

 

"What're you talking about?" mutters Wyvern, dizzily removing his Imposter mask and shoving it back in his backpack. "The excursion was a complete success!"

 

Yui stands in silence a moment, and raises a brow.

 

"A success...?"

 

Wyvern grins to Yui triumphantly and nods as he digs through his black tunic and produces a bag of clothes labeled "Merelas Fashion," striking a heroic pose as he passes it to her and hisses:

 

"I told you that it would be a no-fail strategy, didn't I? Even when your shadow portal didn't last, I still managed to get that beautiful gown for you. Not bad, huh?"

 

Yui reaches into the bag, and pulls out the only two articles of clothing present in it: the leather bra and laced panties that Guido had been wearing in the fashion show. Staring at the undergarmets for a moment, Yui slowly turns her gaze towards Wyvern and tightens her face as a firey rage begins to build up in her eyes.

 

"W-w-w-wait!" stammers Wyvern, freezing and going pale as he notices his error and slowly backs away. "It was dark in there, that was an honest mista-"

 

Throughout the halls of the Pen, members are awoken by the resounding sound of a *SLAP!!!* as it echoes throughout the courtyards of the guild. ;-)

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- 8:00 AM -

 

As the Sun continues lazily rising over the hills East of the Pen, two shady silouhettes sit crouched behind a large tree near the gardens of the keep, staring at the rising sun as they rest in an uncomfortable silence. One silhouette rubs a claw over the red marking of a hand plastered on his scaly visage, while the other fiddles with a large blade of grass in an irritated yet elegent manner.

 

"Yui" mutters Wyvern apologetically, his face still aching from the slap and his tail fidgeting nervously on the ground. "I'm really sorry, once again. You'll say something to me, won't you? We've been sitting here quietly for quite a while now, and it's making me kinda nervous."

 

Yui ceases fiddling with the piece of grass and murmers something under her breath, shifting in her position and continuing to stare at the rising Sun in silence.

 

"I mean, look on the bright side of things." continues Wyvern, scooting an inch closer Yui only to watch her scoot an inch further away from him. "We weren't caught by the bouncers, right? And hey, if you don't want those undergarmets I picked up by accident, I'll gladly take them myself."

 

Wyvern bites his lip as Yui freezes for a moment in order to seeth, casting another angry glance towards Wyvern before refocussing her attention on the sunrise. The overgrown lizard whimpers as silence continues to envelope the clearing, until finally the fragile aura is shattered as Yui catches the scent of vanilla again, causing her stomach to involuntarily emit a low growl.

 

Wyvern immediatly jumps to his feet upon hearing this, pointing to Yui and exclaiming:

 

"AhHA! You're hungry, aren't you? Nothing like a nice, big breakfast to lighten moods and make up for previous mistakes! Let's go Yui, it'll be my treat."

 

"Err, I-" starts Yui, having little time to react as her hand is grabbed by Wyvern and she's quickly pulled up from her resting spot. Wyvern speedily directs her through the gardens of the Pen, passing by Waterlily's Den and several flower clearings while he vibrantly exclaims:

 

"Ooohhhh you're going to love this place, Yui. It's a highly underrated eating spot that's located right near the Pen, and serves a healthy variety of delicious fruits and vegetables to munch on."

 

Yui smiles a little and begins prancing alongside Wyvern rather than being pulled along reluctantly. The reptilian Elder's enthusiasm made it hard to stay mad at him for very long...

 

"So a vegetarian place then?" asks Yui brightly.

 

"Absolutely." hisses Wyvern. "And the atmosphere is great, plus it's very inexpensive... in fact, if you're lucky, you don't have to pay anything at all for it."

 

Yui frowns upon hearing the last part of the restaurant description, and raises a brow as Wyvern halts upon arriving at the area surrounding Gwaihirs enormous greenhouse. Staring at the glass walls of the building, Yui hesitantly takes a step back as Wyvern grins and motions to her.

 

"Quick, follow me." hisses Wyvern in a low whisper, grabbing Yui's hand once again as he whisks her off to a corner of one of the glass walls, which rests next to a large ivy bush. Glancing left and right to make sure that noone except Yui is watching, Wyvern reaches out and tilts a loose pane of glass next to the bush upward, thereby creating a secret entrance to the greenhouse.

 

"Ladies first." hisses Wyvern as he bows and waves a hand towards the lifted pane the hopes of letting Yui inside. The huntress frowns and hesitates for a moment, glancing at the lifted pane and then at Wyvern before rolling her eyes and quietly stepping inside, immediatly becoming engulfed in the humidity of the plant life within. Wyvern follows right behind Yui, carefully lowering the glass after he steps inside and quickly directing her to a series of bushes.

 

"Wait till you taste this stuff." hisses Wyvern as he carefully plucks two peaches off of a bush and hands one of them to Yui. "They're delicious. I've always wondered why Gwaihir doesn't sell the fruits he grows to the Pen Keep... he could make a killing."

 

"Wyvern." mutters Yui cautiously, fidgeting with the peach in her hand and hesitating to take a bite out of it. "Wouldn't this be considered forbidden fruit? I don't think that Gwaihir would really appreciate us eating it."

 

"Nonsense." mumbles Wyvern, already finished with his second peach and moving onto a pear. "Gwaihir would be fine with this, I'm sure he's overstocked on fruit anyway. Now that you mention it, though, I must say that this place bares a striking ressemblence to the Garden of Eden. Say... since we've already picked the 'forbidden fruit,' I don't suppose you'd be interested in engaging in the rest of Adam and Eve's activi-"

 

"No." interrupts Yui firmly, casting an angry glance at Wyvern as he raises his hands in a defensive manner and winces. "And if picking fruit from here is acceptable behaviour, then why did we use a secret entrance to get in?"

 

"Ummm" mutters Wyvern nervously as he spits out a few cherry pits and moves on to pick an orange. "Because it was more romantic...? Awww come on Yui, at least try that peach I picked for you. You know you want to taste it at heart."

 

Yui stares down at the peach in her hand for a moment and lets out a short sigh, shrugging a little as she lifts it to her mouth to taste it. Taking a bite out of the fruit, the huntress is pleasantly surprised by how sweet and refreshing it is

 

"Pretty good, huh?" mutters Wyvern, a cemetary of fruit rinds resting at his scaly feet as moves towards his fourty third meal target. Yui smiles a little and silently nods in response, taking another bite of the peach and thoroughly enjoying its taste.

 

"Here." mumbles Wyvern, picking an apple off of a bush and handing it to Yui. "Take this to add a little variety to your meal, it's really good."

 

Yui nods and gracefully accepts the apple, only to glance down at it and notice that a large black spider is resting on top of it.

 

Wyvern practically hits the ceiling as Yui shrieks loudly and drops the apple in spite of herself, tripping as he lands from his scare and careening towards one of the glass walls of the room. Yui clasps her hands over her mouth and cringes as Wyvern crashes into the wall with his head, embedding his horns into it and setting off several blaring security alarms in the process. Wiggly cabbages begins bouncing left and right, alerting each other of intruders as security vines begins crawling towards the area in the hopes of entangling the guilty party. Yui frantically glances left and right, then shouts to Wyvern:

 

"Wyv, let's go! We have to get out of here!"

 

"I can't!" cries Wyvern back, struggling to dislodge his horns from the glass as several vines move dangerously close to his scaly legs. "I'm stuck!"

 

Yui shakes her head in disbelief, then quickly runs to help the almost dragon out, dashing towards him just as a suicide security pumpkin crashes near the area where she had previously standed. Clenching her teeth and grabbing onto the scales on the back of the overgrown lizards head, she pulls with all her might just as Wyvern pushes against the glass, and manages to free the lizard from his entrapment. The glass pane that Wyverns horns had been stuck on crashes and collapses after his horns been dislodged, which causes seven more security alarms to go off. Wyvern and Yui turn to each other and grimace, then quickly escape through the newly formed exit just as a mob of aggravated plants rushes towards them. The odd couple races away from the greenhouse as fast as their legs can carry them, thankful that the security plants are unable to exit their designated quarters as they fall out of view.

 

After sprinting through the gardens for several minutes, Wyvern and Yui arrive at a clearing that's a safe distance from Gwaihirs greenhouse, and pause in their tracks to catch their breath. As they rest, they turn to one another with wide, frantic eyes and stare at each other for a long moment, until Wyvern finally mutters:

 

"I- *gasp* I-I'll get you a- *pant* I'll get you a sandwich later, O.K?"

 

Wyvern bites his lip as he says this, afraid that Yui might decide to call off the date after the greenhouse disaster. He's more-than-a-little surprised when the huntress begins smiling, shaking her head back and forth and finding herself unable to contain a giggle. Wyvern starts shaking his head in this manner and giggling as well, and soon the two of them are practically rolling on the ground with laughter.

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- 10:00 AM -

 

The Sun begins shining brightly in the sky as Yui and Wyvern finally catch their breaths and let the last of their fears dissipate into the light morning breeze. They lift themselves to their feet and brush the last remaining hints of rampant plant life from their respective attires, turning and nodding to one another as they partake in a few more giggles of disbelief. After a short moment of laughter, they slowly begin walking through the Pen's courtyards again, taking in the sunlight and moving steadily towards the central Pen Keep.

 

"So Yui" hisses Wyvern uncertainly, waving his tail at a lower angle than usual as he walks. "We have an entire day ahead of us, and there're plenty of options to choose from... is there anything you feel like doing in particular?"

 

"Hmm." mutters Yui while flicking a bramble that she had missed off of the edge of her cloak. "Perhaps something a little more calm, that doesn't involve security break-ins, lingerie, and exploding suicide pumpkins?"

 

Wyvern slowly nods and scratches his scaly chin for a moment, having serious difficulty coming up with an activity that doesn't involve one of those three things. The overgrown lizard weighs his options for around ten minutes, then comes to an abrupt halt and snaps a scaly finger as an idea hits him, quickly turning to Yui-chan and hissing:

 

"Actually, I know an activity that fits that description quite well. There's a lesser known site-seeing area near the Pen Keep that offers what one could arguably call 'The First Half Wonder of the World...' although I guess the 'World' in this scenario would be referring to the outskirts of the Mighty Pen Keep."

 

Yui frowns slightly upon hearing this, hesitating as she watches the overgrown lizard change his course from the Pen Keep to another area of the courtyard outdoors. She walks beside him cautiously as they pass through several plains of grass until they come to an old dirt road, which leads to a small wooden cottage that rests nestled within a tiny forest of pine trees. The two Elders walk down the trail and through the trees until they arrive at the front door of the house, at which point Wyvern begins speedily digging through his pockets for something.

 

"Is this it?" mutters Yui, somewhat disappointed as she examines the quaint cottages dirty windows and smoking chiminey.

 

"Not yet, the 'First Half Wonder' is inside." explains Wyvern, digging his claws deeper into his pockets until he eventually pulls out a small key labeled "Property of Greedy." Turning his head to Yui and winking in a sinister manner, Wyvern quietly hisses:

 

"Please don't tell anyone you saw me using this. I snatched it from Greedy the Elder Dwarf when he wasn't looking, and he still doesn't realize that it's missing. Honestly, there are times when I wonder where that Dwarf inherited his penchant for losing things..."

 

Yui barely manages to hold in a giggle upon hearing this contemplation, and patiently watches as Wyvern inserts the key into the door and unlocks it. She hesitates slightly as the lizard motions for her to enter, tapping her foot on the ground until she finally sighs:

 

"Fine, I'll enter. But you realize that since you stole the key, this would technically be considered breaking in again?"

 

"Nonsense." mutters the lizard as he directs Yui through the small doorway and quietly shuts it behind him. "The Elder Dwarves wouldn't mind us entering their humble abode... they're forever indebted to me for hiring them, after all."

 

Yui smirks at Wyverns bloated ego, then curiously glances around the tiny entrance hall of the cottage, particularly noticing the low ceilings and tiny doorways of the hut.

 

"Follow me." hisses Wyvern softly, ducking down and motioning with his hand as he steps through a doorway on the right. "The First Half Wonder of the World is this way. And watch your head, since the doorways are pretty small."

 

Yui pauses for a brief moment, then quietly nods and follows behind the lizard, carefully using his tail as a directional guide. They pass down a small hallway and through a tiny kitchen until they eventually arrive at an incredibly messy-looking living room. Candywrappers, empty cartons of take-out cuisine, used tissues, and old television guides lay gathered around a single couch positioned in front of a glaring television set. On top of the couch sits an Elder Dwarf wearing a stained "I'm a Procrastinator" T-shirt, munching on popcorn as his eyes stay glued to the set.

 

"Behold, Yui" hisses Wyvern in a delighted manner, waving a scaly claw in the air and practically knocking over a tiny vase in the process. "The First Half Wonder of the World: Idly the Elder Dwarf! The only living being capable of surviving off of tiny hand motions, microwavable foods, and daily sitcoms alone. We can only marvel at his, errr... his heightened sense of relaxation!"

 

"It looks almost as messy as your office." says Yui in a half-whisper, taking half a step back and bumping a drawer slightly due to the cramped space of the hall.

 

"Hey..." snickers Wyvern, turning his head to Yui and flashing a mischievous grin. "Do you want to see if we can make him move his head, or maybe even lift his hand?"

 

"Umm, no." mutters Yui nervously, watching as Wyvern steps into the messy living room and staying where she is. "No. We said this was going to be calm, remember?"

 

"It will be." hisses Wyvern back in as reassuring a tone as he can muster, wading through piles of garbage as he slowly approaches the couch. "I mean it's not like he's going to jump out of his seat and-"

 

Yui cringes from her position in the hallway as Wyvern trips over a hidden pile of used T.V guides, and slaps a hand over her eyes as the overgrown lizard sails straight into a drawer of clothes, knocking it over and spilling articles of clothing everywhere. Idly the Elder Dwarf doesn't budge, but rather reaches for his remote and flips the channel, mistaking the noise in the background for television static. Yui-chan watches glumly as Wyvern lifts himself from the area of the drawer, covered from head to toe in Dwarf undergarmets, and frowns as a pumpkin promptly explodes on the television program that Idly is now watching.

 

Wandering back towards Yui in a shameful manner, Wyvern mumbles "erm, sorry" under his breath before brushing the undergarmets off of his form and wandering back towards the entrance of the cottage.

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- 11:30 AM -

 

Wyvern and Yui walk away from the cottage of the Pen Elder Dwarves faster than they had walked towards it, a bit edgy about the accident that had occured within and not wanting to risk any more almost dragonic catastrophes. The two Elders wander through the courtyards again until they eventually arrive at the front entrance of the Pen Keep, this time managing to avoid all detours along the way. Wyvern grins as he takes Yui by the hand and leads her into the familiar halls, turning his head towards her as they walk down the central corridor and hissing:

 

"I think it'sss about time I picked up that sandwich I promised you... and when it comes to sandwiches, there's obviously only one place in the Pen to turn to."

 

Yui raises a brow upon hearing this, silently praying that the overgrown lizard is referring to Celes Crusadors Cafe and not the nearest trash can. She is about to ask the reptilian Elder which place he has in mind when she suddenly notices that he's come to a complete halt, and is staring in a nervous manner at a post-it note stuck on a nearby doorway.

 

"Wyvern?" mutters Yui softly, turning her attention to the door that the lizard is focussing on and paling slightly as she notices that it's the door leading into his Office. "Is something wrong? Celes Crusadors' Cafe is this way-"

 

"Sorry Yui." interrupts Wyvern, frowning slightly as he turns to her with anxiety written over his visage. "I actually have to drop into my Office to run a quick errand, since I forgot to send Ozymandias my daily threat letter, which details how I'll continue to keep Xanthus locked away until he raises my wages. While I'm in there, I might want to dig up a change of clothes as well, since these black colors have outlived there purpose. You like me better in Hawaiin styles anyway, right?"

 

"W-well." mutters Yui, slowly taking a step back from area of the Office. "Yeah, sort of."

 

"Great, then you'll come in with me for a moment? We won't be long."

 

Yui bites her lip slightly and hesitates, not particularly fond of the notion of entering one of the most hazardous areas of the Pen, but not wanting to come across as a stingy date either.

 

"I guess." she mumbles softly. "If we're only there for a moment."

 

Wyverns face relaxes slightly as he hears this response, and he flashes Yui a bright grin of razor sharp teeth as he digs through his black backpack and pulls out two hardhat construction helmets. Passing one of the helmets to Yui and fastening the other over his head, the reptilian Elder hisses:

 

"It's slightly messy in there, so you might want to wear this. Don't worry, just stick near me and you should be fine."

 

Yui shuts her eyes and lets out a frustrated sigh as she fastens the helmet over her head, quietly bracing herself as she follows her reptilian date to the door of his Office. Wyvern pauses for a moment as he reaches the door, sensing something unusual as he turns the doornob with a claw and carefully leads Yui into the oceans of paperwork within.

 

No sooner have the two entered the danger zone of the Office than a volley of razor sharp paper airplanes sails by them at full speed, very narrowly missing them and dangerously speeding by. Turning towards the source of the airplanes, Wyvern and Yui notice Melba seated beside her desk, wielding an Olympic Airplane Catapult and shaking a fist at Wyvern. Noticing Yui standing next to Wyvern, the Almost Secretary of Initiates immediatly drops her weapon and clasps her hands over her mouth in shock, running towards the Elder of Shadows and shoving Wyvern to the side in order to make sure she's alright.

 

"Ms. Temae!" wails the obese secretary, brushing off Yui's cloak and making sure the Elder doesn't have any cuts. "I'm so very sorry, I didn't see you enter with that lazy bum of a lizard. You're alright, I hope?"

 

"Yes..." mutters Yui back, casting a worried glance at the airplanes that now rest embedded in the wall behind her. "I'm fine."

 

Melba breaths a deep sigh of relief upon hearing this, then scowls at Wyvern and shakes a furious fist at him.

 

"You reptilian idiot, what are you doing dragging innocent Ms. Temae into your hellhole of an Office? Don't tell me you're trying to involve her in one of your schemes?! When I find my mallet-"

 

"Actually Melba." interrupts Wyvern, a hint of glee present in his voice as he begins searching for his letter and Hawaiin clothing amongst the countless Office piles. "Yui and I happen to be on a date."

 

Melba pauses upon hearing this, her expression going blank as she points at the lizard and exclaims to Yui:

 

"I knew it! I knew that it was also a matter of time before that corrupt lizards schemes would make him fully delusional... as if he weren't already delusional enough! If you'd like, Yui, I can wreak vengence upon him for saying such outlandish things."

 

"Well, actually Melba." mutters Yui, fiddling with a strand of her blond hair. "Wyvern's statement is sort of true... I won him in an auction."

 

The Almost Secretary of Initiates stares at Yui in disbelief as Wyvern signals that he's found what he was looking for, and disappears behind a large stack of paperwork in order to change clothes.

 

"Y-you poor thing... is it even possible to "win" Wyvern? Who forced you to do it? He hasn't hypnotized you has he?"

 

Yui stops fiddling with her hair, and smiles slightly as she shakes her head.

 

"No, the purchase was of my own accord."

 

Melba shakes her head in disbelief and stares at Yui oddly, patting a chubby hand on her shoulder and moving in closer as she says:

 

"Well, I don't know what you see in him, but take my advice and keep your wits about you at all costs. Who knows what manners he might want to take advantage of you... If you ask me, you should have demanded that they auction off Brute and bidded for him, since that would be a real date. That hunk of a man has got guts... and honey, I'm not just referring to his beer belly."

 

Yui raises a brow and smirks to this last whispered statement as Wyvern steps back out from his makeshift changing quarters, now dressed in a colorful Hawaiin shirt and bermuda shorts. Nodding to Yui happily and taking her by the arm, Wyvern turns to stick his forked tongue out at Melba before they exit the room and commence their walk towards Celes Crusadors Cafe.

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- 12:00 PM -

 

Carbone straightens her fur and hisses as she notices Wyvern approaching her masters Cafe with Yui-chan, quickly darting behind a corner and silently watching as the overgrown lizard leads the huntress into the dining quarters of Celes Crusadors quaint restaurant. Yui and Wyvern seat themselves at opposite ends of a small wooden table and pick up their respective menus, looking over them briefly before Arielle wanders out in a waitress outfit to take their orders.

 

"Celes Crusador is out for the day, so I'm taking her place." chimes Arielle happily, whipping out a small notepad and grinning. "What can I get for you today?"

 

"I'll get a-" blurts Wyvern before suddenly going quiet as Arielle casts him an angry glance. "Oh, right... ladies first huh. Yui?"

 

"I think I'll have the chicken strip filet sandwich on rye, lightly toasted, with a small salad on the side." says Yui softly, smiling as she hands her menu to Arielle. "And please hold any condiments that you think are unnescessary."

 

Arielle smiles and nods, jotting down the order before turning to Wyvern and muttering.

 

"And what will you have, sir?"

 

"Well..." hisses Wyvern, shutting the menu and tossing it over his shoulder. "I think I'll make a special order for a custom sandwich. I'd like a peanut butter and molasses sandwich with anchovies on wonder bread, topped with a mountain of whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles. I'd also like a side order of curly onion cheese doodles with a bucket of grease to dip them into, and a lobster bib to stay clean. Oh, and if you have any, could you get some Nanotoknonnen-O Krispy Treats for the table?"

 

Arielles facial color turns a shade of green as she finishes jotting down Wyverns requests, and the waitress shakes her head in disgust as she heads off to get the orders. Yui stares across the table blankly, silently observing as Wyvern kicks his scaly feet onto the table top and exclaims:

 

"Well, this has been a pleasant day so far, hasn't it? Y'know, I bet that none of the other ladies got to go site-seeing on their dates."

 

"Actually." mutters Yui, moving a hand towards Wyverns feet and gradually pushing them off of the table. "Xaious took Ayshela to see the Sistine Chapel when they went out dating."

 

Wyvern snorts haughtily to this, whipping out the Decanter of Endless Booze and taking a sip before grumbling:

 

"Bah! Who wants to see some old, outdated church anyway? Care for a sip?"

 

"No thank you." says Yui, holding up a hand and politely declining the dirty Decanter. "And for your information, Xaious actually went back in time to take Ayshela to the Chapel while it was still being painted by Michealangelo."

 

Wyvern goes silent for a moment upon hearing this, slowly putting the Decanter away as he grumbles:

 

"Eh, who wants to see a legendary painter in action when you can see a legendary idler out of action right around the outskirts of the Pen, right...?"

 

Yui decides to stay silent and not answer this question as Arielle arrives at the table with two trays. The waitress kindly passes Yui her chicken strip filet sandwich, as well as her small salad on a seperate plate. She then turns to Wyvern and frowns, crossing her arms over her chest and lowly mumbling:

 

"It seems that we're all out of peanut butter and molasses sandwichs today, Mr. Wyvern. However, looking over your financial record with the Cafe and the numerous distasters that you've caused within it, I've arranged it with Lady Celes Crusador so that you can have a free club sandwich, on the house."

 

Wyvern frowns slightly and contemplates this statement as Arielle pulls out a large wooden club that rests between two tiny slices of bread, cringing as she proceeds to clobber him over the head with it. Fuming angrily and pushing the overgrown lizard in the direction of the door, Arielle points and growls:

 

"Get out."

 

"Awww, can't I at least have my curly onion chee-"

 

"GET OUT!" exclaims Arielle, raising the club once again and glaring at the lizard angrily. Wyvern bites his lip and quickly signals to Yui that he'll be waiting outside the door before dashing out of the Cafe as fast as his scaly legs can carry him. Arielle breaths a sigh of relief as Wyvern exits, and drops the club as she smiles towards Yui-chan and cheerfully mutters:

 

"Enjoy your meal, ma'am."

 

Yui sits quietly for a moment, then sighs and lifts herself from her seat, picking up her sandwich and wrapping it in a napkin to go. Nodding to Arielle and thanking her for her service, the huntress wanders out of the Cafe and immediatly turns towards the hobbling form of Wyvern, who seems to be rubbing his head in a pain and leaning back and forth. Yui taps her foot on the ground for a moment, then shakes her head and sighs before breaking off a piece of her sandwich and offering it to the lizard.

 

"Here Wyv... have a piece."

 

Wyvern stops rubbing his head upon hearing this, and breaks into a smile as he turns his head towards Yui and notices the piece of sandwich she's offering. Slowly lifting himself to his feet and brushing the dirt off of his Hawaiin shirt, the overgrown lizard shakes his head and hisses:

 

"No thanks, you can have it, I'll be fine... I had a large fruit breakfast, after all. C'mon, let's go see if any new booths have opened up at the solistice carnival."

 

Yui raises a brow as Wyvern motions to her to follow him, and begins nibbling on her sandwich as she paces alongside him.

 

"Are you sure you don't want any?"

 

"Positive." hisses the lizard happily, winking towards Yui. "I'm sure there'll be plenty of other opportunities to eat anyway... we still have a long day ahead of us, after all!"

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- 1:30 PM -

 

Wyvern skips along happily as he darts between numerous carnival booths, pulling Yui by the hand as the two of them rush into the main Solistice Carnival activity area. Yui stumbles along as Wyvern speedily pulls her past Mr. Bunny's Carrot Stand and Peredhil's Poetry Place, barely maintaining her balance as the lizard rapidly turns to avoid the area of Ayshela's Dunk Tank and dashes through the narrow space between Salinye's Kissing Booth and Popku's KISS Merchandise Stand. The overgrown lizard finally comes to a stop as he arrives at an open space nestled between Katzaniel's Repetition Booth and Mynx's Storytelling Counter, grinning broadly at the good fortune of finding a potential spot to set up shop as he turns to Yui and hisses:

 

"Ssssay... check out this space that's open for a booth, Yui. It seems to be right at the center of commerce."

 

Yui eyes Wyvern cautiously as she finishes the last bite of her sandwich, lightly tossing her leftover napkin into a nearby wastebasket and brushing the dust off of her cloak as she says:

 

"Hmmm. Thinking of profits, even on our date?"

 

Wyvern twists the stinger of his tail in the dirt nervously and chokes a little upon hearing this, raising a scaly finger to speak only to be interrupted by Katzaniel in the booth nextdoor as she loudly exclaims:

 

"Hear yee, hear yee, hear yee, hear yee, hear yee, hear yee!"

 

Yui and Wyvern turn their heads towards the booth as Katzaniel whips out a large parchment and points a finger at it, attracting numerous curious observers towards her stand as she exclaims:

 

"Come one, come all! Step right up to sign this Re-Petition for Repetition!"

 

"Where do I sign?" asks one curious and excited observer, looking over the pamphlet that Katzaniel holds.

 

"Here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here!" exclaims Katzaniel, pointing at different places on the parchment and grinning broadly as several people begin signing it. Wyvern stares at the success of Katzaniel's booth with wide and starry eyes before turning to Yui once again and pleading:

 

"Pleeeaaasssssse Yui? Just look at the success that Katzaniel's booth is having in this area."

 

Yui sighs and stares at the ground in silence for a long moment.

 

"I-"

 

"It won't be entirely for profits." interrupts Wyvern, grabbing a nearby table and pulling it up to the open space. "I mean, it'll be quality time that we'll be spending together. Just imagine a shadow puppet sale booth, where you create puppets and I barter with people to sell them for ridiculous amounts of geld!"

 

Yui remains silent and frowns, caught between having to endure participating in one of Wyverns marketing ploys or shattering his ambitions by saying she isn't interested. The huntress spends a long moment contemplating a manner to balance out her two options and consult the lizard, only to be interrupted as another person speaks Wyverns name before she has a chance to.

 

"Wyvern!"

 

Both Wyvern and Yui turn towards the source of the unfamiliar voice, which comes echoing from the righthand side of the narrow street. Yui raises a brow as she notices a large man wearing a "Chocolate Investigation Agency" outfit, accompanied by four other muscular men in similar suites. Her frown deepens as Wyvern pales at the sight of the investigators, and quickly whispers:

 

"Yui, we gotta go-"

 

"Wyvern." booms the investigator again, taking one step forward from his distant position and holding up a chocolate badge wrapped in a golden candy wrapper. "You are under arrest for attempting to maintain a monopoly on chocolate and trying to drown the market with vanilla. You will come with us peacefully to appear in the Federal Fudge Judiciary Courts, or we will take you there by force."

 

"Quick, this way." hisses Wyvern to Yui, grabbing her hand and turning to the left. The overgrown lizard immediatly pauses in his tracks, however, as he notices that the two bouncers from Merelas' fashion show are now occupying the lefthand side of the street. One of the bouncers notices Wyvern and points a finger at him, angrily exclaiming:

 

"Hey, there's da lizard that got away with those lingerie... get him!"

 

Wyvern frantically turns towards the potential alleyway exits to the North and the South, only to find them occupied by hammer-weilding Pen Elder Dwarves and a garden rake-weilding Gwaihir, who is accompanied by a group of angered wiggly cabbages. Stuttering madly and not knowing which way to turn in his surrounded state, the overgrown lizard turns to Yui and frantically stammers:

 

"I-I'm reaally s-sorry 'bout all this, Yui."

 

A resounding war cry echoes throughout the Solistice Carnival as all of the enraged groups scream "get him!" simultaneously and rush in at once from every angle. Chaos ensues. Shadow rifts are opened, Yui and Wyvern are seperated, a Dwarf performs a ninja jumpkick, chocolate is spilled, cabbages are everywhere, somebody hollers "my spleeeeen!," a garden rake is broken, a story manuscript explodes, and Wyvern somehow manages to dash off holding two wiggly cabbages and carrying an Elder Dwarf on his head.

 

"He's getting away!" cries one of the fashion show bouncers, pointing at Wyvern and accidentally getting hit in the face by Bravery the Elder Dwarfs hammer.

 

"Quick, do something!" exclaims one Chocolate Investigator to another. "Don't just let him run off!"

 

Wyvern grimaces and drops the two wiggly cabbages he holds as one of the Chocolate Investigators begins reciting the incantation to a spell, running as fast as his scaly legs can carry him in the vain hopes of avoiding the officers magic. The Investigator exclaims the last words of the spell with a flourish and succeeds at casting Dispell Shadows, which accidentally causes the entire mob to become blinded by sunlight, allowing Wyvern to safely escape.

 

"Arrrgh!" cries one of the Chocolate Investigators, clutching at his eyes in pain. "What'd you do that for, you clutz?! You let him get away!"

 

"You told me to do something to stop him, and that's all I could think of!" exclaims the Investigator that had cast the spell. "I'm sorry... but hey, look on the bright side-"

 

"It's already bright enough as it is, you idiot!" yells a Chocolate Investigator angrily while shaking his fist.

 

"No, no I mean look on the brighter side of the situation." continues the spell-caster apologetically. "That spell dispells all shadows within a five mile radius of here for the next few hours, which means the lizard has fewer places to hide. We'll find him, sooner or later."

 

As the Chocolate Investigators talk and the mob slowly recovers from its blindness, Wyvern sits huddled behind a large abandoned Carnival booth several alleys away, satisfied with his hiding place. The overgrown lizard breaths a sigh of relief mingled with anxiety, and turns his eyes to the sky as he wonders what could have happened to Yui-chan in the chaos of the mob. Rather than seeing clouds or sunshine, the lizard accidentally looks up the skirt of Shiny the Elder Dwarf in the process, breaking her from her fascination of the shiny spell and causing her to promptly plant a foot in his face. Hopping off of the lizard's head, the Elder Dwarf growls "pervert!" before tossing her hammer at him and storming back off in the direction of her cottage.

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- 4:00 PM -

 

After quietly hiding for several hours, Wyvern slowly peeks his head above the counter of the booth and quickly glances in both directions, breathing a sigh of relief when he finds that the angry mob has departed from the area. Perking up his ears to make sure that no sounds of aggravated growling can be heard and squinting due to the lack of shadows, the overgrown lizard cautiously begins to lift himself from his hiding place, only to jump as he suddenly hears a sound behind him.

 

"SQUEAK."

 

Wyvern frantically turns and reachs for the hammer that Shiny had dropped, only to be met by the tiny appearence of the Grim Squeaker standing near his feet. The overgrown lizard pants and stares at the Death of Rats with wild eyes for a moment before dropping his hammer and hissing:

 

"Geeze Grim, you startled me... What are you doing in this abandoned corner of the Carnival area?"

 

"SQUEAK." repeats the Death of Rats, tapping his toothpick-sized scyth on the ground twice and turning his skeletal visage towards Wyvern. The overgrown lizard stares back at the Grim Squeaker for a moment, then raises a brow curiously and shrugs as he steps out of his hiding place and turns to walk over to the spot where the mob brawl had taken place.

 

"Well, good luck with whatever you're trying to do here. I've gotta find Yui, since we're supposed to be on a date."

 

The Grim Squeaker stands in silence as he watches Wyvern wander down an alley towards the area of Katzaniel and Mynx's booths, twisting his scyth in frustration at being unable to get his message across.

 

Wyvern passes through several alleys and sidestreets until he comes to the near-deserted area where the chaotic fight had taken place. Turning towards the table that he had set up in the free spot for a booth and noticing that it was broken in half in the mayhem, Wyvern taps his foot on the ground for a moment before half-whispering:

 

"Pssst, Yui. The coast is clear, you can come out now."

 

The overgrown lizard waits through a few moments of silence, then speaks in a louder voice.

 

"Hey Yui, it's safe to come out now, let's go have some more fun."

 

Wyvern scratches his chin and frowns when this also fails to produce a response, then cups his scaly claws over his mouth and shouts.

 

"Yui, those angry mob creeps have left, you can come out of hiding now!"

 

The reptilian Elder waits for several minutes as his exclamation echoes hollowly down each of the once-occupied alleyways, then mutters a low grumble of worry and disappointment as no voice calls back. The lizard scratchs his scaly head for a moment, then turns towards Katzaniels Repetition Booth and mutters:

 

"Say, Katzaniel... have you seen Yui around these parts?"

 

Katzaniel shifts from her glum position at the Repetition booth, then turns her head towards the lizard and angrily mutters.

 

"No, no, and no. After that whole mob event, the Carnival hasn't had too many visitors. They've gone off to their quarters, gone off to their rooms, gone off to their Offices, gone off to their-"

 

"I see, I see." interrupts Wyvern, tapping his foot on the ground in the hopes of hiding his discontent. "That's too bad..."

 

"For what it's worth." grumbles Mynx from her Storytelling Booth. "Once upon a time, before the mob attacked, Yui was standing here glumly while you were setting up a booth. That's the last I saw of her... though it's impossible to know exactly what happened in the confusion of that mob."

 

"Hmmm..." mutters Wyvern, rubbing a claw over his scaly chin and thinking. "Well, thanks anyway you two. I guess I'll just search for her around here and in the Pen Keep... hope she isn't too angry at me."

 

With that, the overgrown lizard nods to Katzaniel and Mynx and begins wandering down the street towards the Pen Keep, calling out Yui's name every few paces and checking behind booths and between alleys as he walks.

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- 6:00 PM -

 

Wyverns frown deepens when he finds no sign of Yui after a thorough search of the Solistice Carnival area, and an aura of worry begins to envelope him as he spends several hours searching through the Pen Keep to no avail. The reptilian Elder carefully investigates the central hall of the Cabaret Room, the tables of parchments in the Assembly Room, the numerous artistic quarters of the Banquet Hall, the stage and twisting passageways of the Conservatory, the shelves of old tomes and desks in the Library, the deepest oceanic depths of the paperwork littering his Office, Orlans "other" closet, and the Mighty Pens plumbing system amongst many other places... all with no success. With each clueless answer Wyvern recieves from Pen members concerning Yui's whereabouts, he grows a little more worried and a little more desperate. Several hours pass in this manner until Wyvern finally arrives at the only place he hasn't checked yet: the Mighty Pen Couch.

 

Wyvern straightens the scales on his head and breaths an exhausted sigh as he slowly approaches the couch, shutting his eyes and speaking a silent prayer in the hopes of miraculously finding Yui hiding underneath it. The overgrown lizard takes two steps towards the Couch, then suddenly perks up as he hears a faint shuffling sound coming from the tiny space under it. The reptilian Elders aura of gloom is immediatly lifted as a broad grin makes its way across his face, and he happily turns to the piece of furniture and exclaims:

 

"Ahha, there you are. You certainly had me worried, Yui... what are you doing under the-"

 

"SQUEAK."

 

Wyvern pauses and frowns as he hears the unmistakable signature phrase of the Death of Rats, and lifts the Couch only to find the Grim Squeaker where he had expected Yui to be. The aura of gloom immediatly envelopes Wyvern once again.

 

"You again?" hisses Wyvern in a half-desperate, half-disappointed whisper. "Damn it all Grim, this is terrible!"

 

"SQUEAK." answers the Death of Rats, stepping out from his position underneath the Couch and tapping his scyth on the carpet as he walks. The Squeaker turns his skeletal head to Wyvern once again and stares at him.

 

"I-I can't find Yui-chan anywhere, what could have possibly happened to her?" continues Wyvern, pacing back and forth and cursing to himself.

 

"SQUEAK." exclaims the Grim Squeaker, reaching for a piece of charcoal as well as a sign to write on.

 

"There's only one option left." grumbles Wyvern. "One last resort that I never thought I'd have to rely upon, but which may be the only way to find a clue about Yui's whereabouts. An Inspector, the only Inspector I know... Inspector I. M Clueless."

 

The Grim Squeaker turns his head towards Wyvern once again and pauses in his charcoal writing. The Squeakers bones, while incapable of shifting emotional expressions, still somehow hint at shock and disbelief.

 

"Good luck once again in whatever you're trying to accomplish." hisses the lizard as he rushes out of the room, ignoring the sign that the Death of Rats had just finished writing. "I'm going to disguise myself in order to ask the Inspector for his thoughts on the matter. Clueless might be bad, but he's still slightly better than having no clue whatsoever."

 

Wyvern immediatly dashes down the Cabaret Rooms central hall and out of the main entrance of the Pen, rummaging through his black backpack for the Imposter mask he had previously worn as he sprints across the Courtyards towards Clueless' Private Eye headquarters. The desperate lizard eventually reaches a small Office building located on an open field of grass, and pants as he tosses the Imposter mask over his face and knocks on the door. Wyvern pauses as the unlocked door slowly creaks open to reveal an empty waiting room, and cautiously wanders in only to notice Inspector I. M Clueless sitting at the desk where a secretary would normally be seated. The masked lizard clears his throat of a few ashes, then mutters:

 

"Errr, excuse me, Mr. I. M Clueless? My name's Weevern, Weevern R. NowhereNearADragon, and I have a case that I think you might be interested in."

 

Inspector I. M Clueless raps his fingers across his desk, then lifts himself from his seat and strikes as mysterious a pose as he can muster... which is not very mysterious, given the distinct lack of shadows in the area. Turning to his newest client and tipping his detective hat over his head, Clueless cooly murmers:

 

"As you can probably imagine by seeing this room, I'm a very busy man... however, I'll take your case out of the goodness of my heart. Please, describe it to me."

 

"Well." mutters Wyvern, rolling his eyes at the Inspectors massive ego. "A lady friend of mine - we'll call her Wui for the time-being - was strolling with me through a carnival when we were suddenly attacked by an angry mob from every direction. Shadow rifts were opened, Wui and I were seperated, a Dwarf performed a ninja jumpkick, chocolate was spilled, cabbages were everywhere, somebody cried "my spleeeeen!," a garden rake was broken, a story manuscript exploded, and I somehow managed to escape from the mess. Since that event, I haven't been able to find Wui anywhere. I'd like to locate her, which is where you come into play."

 

Inspector I. M Clueless stares at Wyvern in disbelief for a long moment, then laughs and exclaims:

 

"I'm sorry Mr. NowhereNearADragon, but I'm afraid you've come to the wrong man if that's the kind of thing you're looking for. You'll want to pay a visit to the local mortician to find information like that."

 

Wyvern stares at Inspector I. M Clueless blankly, lightly adjusting his mask as he hisses:

 

"L-local mortician?"

 

“Absolutely.” grunts Clueless, seating himself back in his secretary chair and slowly shaking his head. “Honestly, I think you're insulting my intelligence by even asking me to solve a 'case' like that. Everyone knows that a scenario of that extreme can only result in death."

 

"Y-you mean that you really think that Y- errr -Wui is dead?"

 

"You're asking me if I think she's dead?" chuckles Clueless. "I know she's dead, very few could survive something like that. Besides, carnivals are extremely dangerous places... if it isn't angry mobs, it's a runaway rollercoaster or a cheap Almost Dragonic Brand Hotdog. They're just full of death traps."

 

Wyvern shakes his head and gradually begins snickering in disbelief, turning to depart from the Inspectors Office and silently exiting through the creaking door he had used to enter. The overgrown lizard continues snickering at the ridiculous proposal that Yui might be dead as he walks back across the fields in the direction of the Pen's Courtyards, but slowly stops snickering as he seriously begins considering the option. Yui didn't have protective scales like Wyvern did to avoid being injured, she was nowhere to be found, and to top things off the Grim Squeaker seemed to be frequently appearing in his searches for her...

 

"N-n-no." mutters Wyvern to himself, shaking his head as his tail sways back and forth nervously. "I-it can't be."

 

Wyverns lip trembles as he vainly attempts to deny what appears to be the most logical explanation for Yui's disappearence, and his feet gradually speed up in their course towards the Pen Keep as the thought of Yui's death begins seriously haunting his thoughts.

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- 8:00 PM -

 

By the time Wyvern arrives back at the Pen Keep, his scales have paled to a lighter shade of crimson and his hands and tail have begun trembling in spite of himself. The overgrown lizard frantically dashes into the Assembly Room, and quickly "hides" at a corner where a shadow would normally be in the hopes of catching his breath. Leaning back against a wall and breathing in short, nervous gasps, the reptilian Elder begins fidgeting with the collar of his Hawaiin shirt as he quietly hisses to himself:

 

"N-n-no, I have to get th-these thoughts out of my mind. I-I mean, Yui dying, i-i-it's ridiculous. U-u-unheard of. Noone has died as a result of my sche-"

 

"SQUEAK."

 

Wyvern freezes and pales as he hears the all-too-familiar phrase of the infamous Squeaker, and slowly turns his head only to notice the Death of Rats staring at him from a nearby tabletop. The Grim Squeaker triumphantly taps his scyth on the table as he holds up a sign with one skeletal paw. Wyvern squints nervously as he reads the first few words written on it:

 

------

 

I know where Yui is. I saw it happen myself-

 

------

 

"N-n-n-n-n-NO!" cries Wyvern in horror, turning his eyes away from the sign and plastering himself up against the corner of the wall. "It's true! Yui-chan is dead! By the love of geld, what have I done?!"

 

The Grim Squeaker stares as Wyvern dashes out of the room as fast as his scaley legs can carry him, and slaps a skeletal paw on his forehead as he overhears the overgrown lizards misinterpretation. He then hunches over and begins shaking his head, reading over the detailed explanation of Yui's disappearence on the second half of the sign and wondering if he had written it in too small a font...

 

Wyvern grows paler and paler as he dashes through several corridors and staircases, completely frantic at the thought of Yui's death as he begins approaching Ozymandias' quarters. The overgrown lizards lower lip begins trembling as he arrives at the door to the Loremasters Office, and he doesn't notice when the shadows get restored as he frantically knocks on the door.

 

The reptilian Elder stands in silence for a moment as the door is opened, and hesitates as he steps into the Loremasters Office. He immediatly notices Ozymandias sitting at his desk reading over several Pen issues and documents, and quietly seats himself in an easychair located in front of his working quarters. The lizard sits in silence for a moment, desperatly trying to hide his traumatic thoughts, until Ozymandias finally speaks up.

 

"Hello Wyvern." says Ozymandias, keeping his eyes focussed on his paperwork as he talks. "What can I do for you this evening? If it's more reasoning for a raise in wages, I won't be listening."

 

Wyvern sits in silence for a moment, digging his claws into the arm rest of the chair and biting his scaly lip. The lizard then clears his throat of a few ashes, takes a deep breath, and blurts:

 

"Ozy, I really screwed up."

 

Ozymandias smirks as he continues reading over his paperwork, then rolls his eyes as he responds:

 

"Another scheme, huh? Well, what else is new. As always, I'll be covering the damage done to the Pen with the latest financial plan."

 

"N-no." mutters Wyvern sadly, digging his claws deeper into the armrest. "No, I mean I really screwed up Ozy, big time. I... I'm honestly not sure if I'm ever going to be able to forgive myself."

 

Ozymandias sets down the paper he's staring at and glances at Wyvern for a moment, then lets out a sigh as he picks up another sheet from his pile of "to-do" work and mutters:

 

"Alright then, let's hear it."

 

"W-w-well." starts Wyvern with much difficulty, taking a deep swallow and choking on his own words. "Y-you see, I was on this date with Yui-chan, and-"

 

At that moment, before Wyvern can continue, Yui steps in through the Office entrance and turns towards the lizard, producing an expression of genuine shock on Wyvern's face and suddenly rendering him quiet. Placing her hands on her hips and glaring at Wyvern angrily, Yui exclaims:

 

"There you are! Listen Wyvern, I've been very patient with you, but we really need to discuss your methods of dating. Getting stranded in the shadow planes for several hours due to a violent mob attack is definitely not my idea of a good ti-"

 

Yui's words are cut short as Wyvern suddenly pounces out of his seat and practically flings himself into her arms, hugging her tightly and burying his face into her cloak. Yui stands motionless in an awkward silence as the lizard lightly tightens his grip, casting a quick glance towards Ozymandias before quietly muttering:

 

"Uhhh... Wyvern?"

 

A long moment of silence passes as Wyvern continues to cling to Yui, softly crying into her cloak and vainly hoping noone will notice. The huntress awkwardly places a hand on the lizards head and doesn't dare to move, uncertain of how to comfort him in such an unusual state. After a long pause, Wyvern softly murmers:

 

"*sniff* A-are you O.K Yui? *sniff*"

 

Yui pauses for a moment, then slowly nods and pats the lizard on the head as he continues crying into her cloak.

 

"Yes, yes I'm fine."

 

Wyvern continues clinging to Yui, and the two stand in silence for several minutes until Ozymandias eventually clears his throat in a deliberatly loud manner, unable to concentrate on his work with the two of them standing there. Wyvern breaks from his grasp upon hearing this, and wipes a few tears off of his cheeks as he murmers:

 

"*sniff* W-well, thanks for the date Yui-chan. I- *sniff* I really appreciate your bidding on me. *sniff* Hope the rest of your evening goes well."

 

With that, the overgrown lizard brightly smiles towards Yui and then quickly dashes out of the room. The huntress doesn't even have time to speak a word as the lizard speedily sprints down the hall and promptly vanishes as he passes down a spiralling staircase.

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- 9:00 PM -

 

Yui sighs to herself softly as she exits Ozymandias' Office and begins slowly wandering in the direction of her room, glancing down adjacent hallways and corridors in the hopes of catching Wyvern and exchanging a few final words with him. The huntress was uncertain of which emotion she felt most dominantly in the light of recent events... anger, sadness, happiness and embarassment all wrestled chaotically inside of her head, searching for some sort of organization or clarity in the form of a few words from her former reptilian date.

 

Yui still hasn't reached a decisive emotion when she arrives at the saircase leading up to her hall, and surrenders to ambivalence as she realizes that she probably won't be seeing any more of Wyvern for the evening. As she wanders up the stairway to the hall leading to her room, she notices that the area is bathed in a beautiful pale moonlight, peaceful and oblivious to the many perilous situations she had been involved in over the course of the day. Yui turns her head towards the window and smiles as she walks towards her door, soaking in the half-moons comforting rays and letting the worst of her date experiences wash away in its radiance. The huntress comes to a halt when she arrives at her door, and begins reaching for her keys only to notice a package propped up against the wall.

 

"Hmm? What's this?"

 

Yui kneels to inspect the bag, and raises a brow curiously when she see's that it has a "Merelas Fashion" label on it, similar to the one that Wyvern had stolen from the fashion show area earlier. Finding a note attached to the bag and noticing that it's been marked "To Yui" in an unmistakable almost dragonic scrawl, Yui curiously opens it with a finger and examines the sloppily written letter inside:

 

Dear Yui,

 

Thought I'd offer you this as a little souvenir of our day out, since I sorta promised it to you and didn't quite hold true to my word. I really want you to know that, lack of curly onion cheese doodles and minor emotional breakdowns aside, I had a fantastic time with you today, and hope you feel that your geld was well spent in the bachelor auction. I also hope I didn't stress you too much with activities, and really apologize for the whole 'mass mob trapping you in the shadow planes by accident' thingy. Forgive me, forgive me, forgive me. I hobble in the shadow of your mercy.

 

Yours,

Wyvern

 

P.S: Pretty please forgive me!

 

Yui smirks and tucks the letter into one of her pockets, then examines the Merelas Fashion bag more closely. Reaching into the bag, her eyes suddenly widen as she pulls out the elegent formal gown she had worn during the Mighty Pen Fashion Show. Her shock is only elevated when she notices a small piece of paper attached to the gown... a receit, signed by Merelas, with a short phrase in capital letters stamped right below the signature:

 

"PAID IN FULL."

 

;-)

 

 

OOC: That marks my last official post in this thread... though if anyone involved in part of the thread feels like posting another entry to draw it to a complete close, they're more than welcome. ^_^ Thanks for the comments, Peredhil and Mynx... I'm glad ya guys enjoyed it. :)

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Oh, I'm sure that more than just the two of them enjoyed it. I loved it. And I even had a cameo!! That's so cool!! As usual, Wyvern, a well-written and amusing storyline. Highly amusing that Yui herself was lost for so many hours of the day. I think I will be giggling for as many.

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- 11:15pm - The next night...

 

Wyvern shuffled down the hallway of the Pen Keep, rubbing one curled paw against his gritty eyes and cursing the Honest Abe Debt Collection Service's latest idea of using tear gas grenades to try to slow him down. Apparently, they didn't know that he could run quite well through nearly any physical discomfort when geld was involved. It was a talent to be proud of, for sure.

 

Casting a last, furtive glance over his shoulder to reassure himself that he'd lost his angry pursuers, the scaly schemer turned down a side-corridor and lengthened his strides, his claws clicking on the marble floor. It was late, and a day full of felonies and frantic flights had left him pleasantly tired. As he began the familiar walk to his quarters, he rubbed his paws together in anticipation of curling up in bed (or wherever he could find space in his disastrous quarters) and sleeping until at least noon. Melba would never find her way out of the bear trap he'd hidden under her desk before then, and these days, Xanthus was too weak from hunger to successfully escape from the Recruiter's Office.

 

Pausing for an instant, Wyvie laid a thoughtful claw against the side of his nose and pondered whether he should be worried that the captive recruit didn't even bother to curse at him when he came in the office... But after about a half-second worrying, he shrugged and continued on his way, dismissing the thought with a mumbled, "Ozy'll cave before he croaks, I'm sure..." The very idea distracted him immediately with images of diving into the swimming pool full of geld that was one of his demands, and he hissed a little snicker, rubbing his greedy palms together.

 

In fact, the almost-draconic Elder was so distracted by his daydreams that he had unlocked the door to his quarters and waded halfway to his bed through the mess by the time he realized that he'd seen a note tacked to his doorframe. He blinked, ignoring an ominous crash behind him as he turned back towards the door, his curiosity stronger than his fatigue.

 

Wyvern tumbled head-first into the hallway, yanking his foot away from what was either last month's pork-rind-and-spam yogurt treat or a ravenous were-beast trying to eat him from the toes up and grabbing the mysterious note on the way down. With the blunt back of his tail, he slammed the door shut before a pile of crumbled scheme plans could collapse into the corridor after him, his greedy gaze already riveted to the neat little paper in his paws. It smelled like vanilla and cinnamon, and his name was scrawled across its face in what could only be a woman's flowing handwriting. To the overgrown gecko's hyperactive imagination, that left only one conclusion.

 

"It's a love letter! I knew I was irresistible!" As he absently scrambled back to his feet, Wyvern whooped aloud. The excited Elder lifted a shaking paw and used his fore-claw to slit the seal, squinting at the sparse writing revealed on the inside.

 

Meet me at the fountain in the courtyard at midnight, tonight.

Come alone, and wear your best shirt.

... and for the love of god, no Hawaiian prints!

Wyvern read the rather imperative and very anonymous missive at least three times before he let loose a gleeful cackle, rubbing the page lovingly against the sandpaper surface of his crimson cheek. A secret admirer! His mind filled with images of buxom, bikini-clad babes waving and calling out to him, their pouty lips moving in slow motion as they all held out bags full of geld and begged him to "pick me! pick me!" Smiling dreamily, he practically floated back through the door to his quarters, unperturbed by the ravenous, self-aware snack food that latched onto his ankle with moldy, green teeth.

 

Ten minutes later, he was staring at a closet full of garish Hawaiian print shirts and contemplating whether he had enough time to sneak into Gyrfalcon's room and 'borrow' that nice dress tunic that Salinye had embroidered. ... the half-elf probably wouldn't mind. Much.

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- 11:55pm -

 

Gyrfalcon barked out a dwarvish curse, grabbing his aching shin and catching himself with a desperate grip on a bedpost. "Wyvern, this has gone a little beyond amusing. Get this, this ... thing off my head!" he growled, his voice muffled by strange, warbling little creature that had wrapped itself bonelessly over his eyes and half of his face.

 

"Um... gee, sorry, Gyr, but I really can't right now. I'm going to be late if I don't hurry up, and you should know a playah never keeps the ladies waiting," Wyvie hissed from his place in the closet doorway, running a paw idly over his massive, afro wig. He leaned a little further into the small space, rifling through his fellow Elder's clothes with cool deliberation. "His name's Cuddles, by the way. ... now where's that nice shirt Salinye made you?"

 

The ranger went stock-still, his struggles with the cloying whatever-it-was instantly dwarfed. "No. Absolutely not!" He tried to walk forward again, only to smack his poor, bruised shin once more on the little stand Wyvern had pushed in his way. "You can't have that! You'll ruin it in about two seconds, and Salinye will kill me for it. Borrow anything else you want, just not th--"

 

"Oh, here it is," Wyvie interrupted cheerfully, gently disengaging the tunic from its hanger. He didn't even seem to notice Gyr's growing panic, intent as he was on trying to fit his massive bulk into the less-massive piece of clothing. Though he managed to get it on without ripping it, he frowned at his reflection in the long mirror on the wall, muttering, "I thought it would be a little looser..."

 

The ranger growled from across the room, finally managing to pry the clingy little 'Cuddles' away from one eye. "Take it off right now, and I promise not to hurt you. Much." With an angry kick, he shoved away the table that'd thwarted him before and snatched his katana from its resting place by his bed.

 

Wyvern gulped and shuffled towards the door, keeping his beady eyes trained on the irate swordsman's rather lethal-looking blade. His first attempt to speak came out as nothing more than a squeak, so he cleared the ashes from his throat and tried again. "N-Now, Gyr... you know I wouldn't bother you at this hour if it weren't an emergency. I'll just take this and be out of your hair so you can get back to your... um... r-rest." With that, the overgrown lizard turned and sprinted for the door, skidding out into the hall with a little yelp.

 

Gyr followed for about ten paces before he gave up any hope of saving the shirt. With a dejected sigh, he yanked the unidentifiable creature the rest of the way off his head and watched it wrap its filmy body around his hand, instead. "Well, Cuddles, I guess we'd better start planning what to tell Salinye when he brings her gift back ruined." Visions of flashing blue eyes and flying spells had him pondering his defenses as he wandered back to his quarters.

 

"... I wonder if you're fireball-proof," he asked his new 'glove' without much hope, pulling the door closed behind him.

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  • 4 weeks later...

- 12:02 am -

 

"Oh, dear, oh, dear!" The little white rabbit pulled a fob watch from his jacket pocket without breaking a stride, clucking in dismay at what he read on its mother-of-pearl face. His cotton-ball tail shuddered as he redoubled his pace, hopping madly down the corridor. "Oh, my, oh, dear! This won't do. Won't do at all... I'm late! I'm la--ugh!!!"

 

THUMP. Before he knew what had hit him, the hapless gentleman bunny was facedown on the ground, as near to two-dimensional as he ever wanted to get and sporting a fresh wyvern-print in the center of his back. He raised black, beady, bleary eyes just in time to see his heavy attacker shoot a glance back at him and belatedly announce, "Look out! Late almost-dragon comin' through!"

 

"..." Without a word, the rabbit flopped his head back to the floor, ignoring the thrown 'Almost-Draconic Emergency Services' business card that lay beside him.

 

Wyvern skidded around the corner and burst through the doorway, running full-tilt along the wall of the main building. His almost-draconic brand wristwatch said that it was 11:48pm, and he winced inwardly, hoping his mysterious and sexy admirer (who was gaining favorable adjectives every time he thought of her) would wait for him. Of course, if she was as hopelessly in love with him as he assumed she was, she'd probably wait forever, but a playah just didn't take chances with the honeys.

 

With one paw holding the heavy mass of afro wig steady on his head, Wyvern rounded the corner and bounded into the courtyard, his gaze riveted to the dimly-lit fountain at its center. There! Standing nearby, he could see an unmistakably humanoid shadow, an undoubtedly-frantic devotee silhouetted by the silvery light of the moon. Each four-pawed gallop brought him closer to the woman of his dreams, and the almost-dragon couldn't help but pant happily at the very thought of the beauty that awaited him...

 

"My princess," Wyvern exclaimed as he approached, too excited to wait until he could see his lady, "my lovely and extremely tasteful bride-to-be! I hope you didn't worry because I was late. I've come for you, my dearest ... " At that moment, she turned into the light, revealing a large woman with a besotted grin and a very large mallet held in her beefy hands. "ogress?!"

 

Screaming like a little girl, the almost-dragon screeched to a stop, his claws digging long furrows in the earth as his bugging eyes ran over the horror in front of him. Pot-bellied, black-eyed and green-skinned, she smiled at him through half-black teeth, her lips stretching around the massive tusks that jutted out from her lower jaw. Far from the lithe and curvaceous figure in his daydreams, she was a block of sturdy muscle softened by the flubber of a massive, drooping stomach that dripped out from under her horrifying spandex tank top. Her legs, encased in a matching pair of spandex capris, might have been passably pleasant if not for the wiry coat of black hair that just screamed 'yetti'.

 

As Wyvern ogled in stunned dismay, the massive admirer before him raised arms that would have made Conan the Barbarian jealous and rumbled, "Oh. Dearest Wyvern. How I have. Waited for dis moment to. Hold you in my. Loving. Arms and... um... smothah you wif. Da kind of kisses. Dat your han'some. Veerage... er... Veezage deserves." She paused awkwardly, tilting her head as if listening to something, then brightened her ferocious smile and nodded. "Come to. Me. And let. Me. Show you da. Powah. Of my. ... uh ... Admeeration. And. Love."

 

"S-s-s..." As she thundered towards him, step by slow step, the almost-dragon quaked in his nonexistent boots, trying to force words past the lump of ice in his throat. "S-s-s... s-st...s-s-stay a-away!"

 

His attempt at command might as well have been a blown kiss for all the effect it had on his behemoth of an 'admirer', for she smiled toothily and growled, "Do not. Fear. My widdle wubbums-wyvie-pooh. You don't gotta be shy around youah big princess, or nuddin'." As she stepped within arms reach, the green beefcake clapped her rock-crushing hands over Wyvie's shoulders and pulled him close enough to smell the garlicked boar stew on her breath. Puckering lips that looked for all the world like hair-dotted caterpillars, she leaned in with amorous intent, closing her eyes.

 

"YEARGH!" The threat of imminent death by kissation jarred her unwilling paramour from his paralysis, and Wyvern jerked away, sacrificing a few precious scales to her grip. He didn't waste any time mourning them, though, his claws scrabbling on the grass as he turned and dropped to all fours, fully prepared to launch into a life-saving sprint back the way he came.

 

It was the other voice that stopped him before he got more than pace or two, its familiar tones short-circuiting his one-track mind with confusion. "...well. I admit I wasn't really expecting you to bring another woman to our first-and-a-half date, Wyvern."

 

Yui-chan frowned slightly as she stepped from the shadows at the edge of the courtyard, but the object of her ire forgot to notice that as he stared, slack-jawed and silent, at the vision she made. She was wearing it, the dress, the masterpiece of black velvet and sparkling diamonds that had made her stunning on the stage of Merelas' fashion show. At midnight in the Mighty Pen's courtyard, however, with the moon making her hair silver and her skin luminous above a bodice filled with diamonds that twinkled with her every breath, the young woman put the word 'stunning' to shame. She looked nothing less than celestial, like a part of the heavens that had escaped from the night sky to dance closer to the earth.

 

Poor Wyvern could barely process a thought past the sight of her.

 

"Y... Y-Y... Yui?!" He managed to squeak the single word past the malfunction in his brain before the sheer number of shocks in the past few minutes caught up with him. With a little whimper, the almost-dragon succumbed to a dead faint, his eyes rolling back in his head as he sunk to the ground.

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Standing over Wyvern's fallen form, the Huntress rolled her eyes and shot a grin to her partner in crime, who stepped out from behind the fountain and clapped a hand on the massive shoulder of her ogre Muse. The other woman's blue eyes twinkled in the darkness, bright with barely-concealed mirth.

 

"That was great! You should have seen his face when Bertha turned around, Yui. It was priceless!"

 

The little woman across the way laughed softly, leaning down to pat Wyvern's rough cheek ineffectually. "I can imagine. You two were great. I can't thank you enough for helping."

 

"Our pleasure, Yui. Right, Bertha?"

 

"Yeah, but ..." The ogress pouted slightly, her beady, black eyes fixed on the fallen almost-dragon. "Me kinda wanted a kiss. Little dragonling is cute an' me always liked a man in scales."

 

Salinye and Yui both raised brows at the ogress over that one, but the mild horror of the thought was quickly overshadowed by a particularly vivid mental image of Bertha dragging him around by the tail that had them doubled over, laughing. Twisted minds think alike.

 

It was the human who recovered first and, swiping the tears of mirth from her eyes, peered down at the unconscious form lumped at her feet. "Well, maybe if you ask really nicely, he'll give you one next time, Bertha. ... ask really nicely and offer him a geld." The intent expression on the ogress' face as she considered that advice nearly triggered another fit of giggles, but Salinye chose that moment to interject the question she'd been biting back since her partner in crime had first asked for her help.

 

"So, as much fun as this was, why exactly did you want to shock the horns off Wyvern in the first place?"

 

"Mph," Yui huffed in response, her lips twisting up in a wry little grin. "Mostly because it's fun. I also needed some measure of revenge for spending an afternoon trapped in the shadows thanks to his incessant scheming. You would not believe the stunning headache I had after that much time on the wrong side of the light!"

 

The sorceress nodded sympathetically, brushing her hair back from her shoulder. "Oh, yes. I remember you mentioning how tiring that is for you," she said, following her words with the growth of another deliciously-wicked smile. "You're going to have to tell me about this episode, though. How did he manage to do that? For that matter, I still need to hear the rest of the details of your bachelor date with him."

 

Yui couldn't resist an answering smile, and she easily promised, "I'll be sure to tell you all about it tomorrow, as long as you promise not to mention anything to Aegon. I didn't ... exactly tell him about the auction or the dates I won."

 

"Eep. Are you sure that was wise?"

 

"Well, no, but..." The Huntress shrugged, grimacing theatrically, "it sure is easier than spending an hour convincing him that it's all for fun and the sake of Pen participation. What he doesn't know can't hurt him, right?"

 

Blue eyes narrowing skeptically, Salinye frowned. "Mmm... I suppose not."

 

Despite her friend's lack of conviction, Yui nodded, smiling reassuringly. "Exactly. Now, I'm going to sit down and wait for Mr. Manly, here, to wake back up. There's still one more little thing I want from him before our date is complete."

 

Salinye raised a brow, her curiosity piqued. "Oh? And what's that?"

 

Unable to resist a chance to be mysterious, the Huntress just gave her elven friend a smug smile. "I'll tell you about that tomorrow, too. Goodnight, Salinye. Bertha."

 

"Oooooh, you...." As much as she wanted to ferret the story out, Salinye knew that expression meant she'd get nothing more for the time being. There was nothing for it but to accept defeat gracefully, so she stuck out her tongue at the other woman and grumbled, "Fine, but if you forget to come find me, I'm sending Bertha after you."

 

Somehow, the grin Bertha offered to the small Huntress managed to be amusing yet threatening at the same time, and Yui hastened to bow politely. "Heaven forbid! I'll be sure to find you. Now, shoo before he wakes up." She softened the order with a wink and watched them both wander back into the building, leaving her alone in the dark but for an unconscious lizard.

 

Yui sat down on the lip of the fountain, ever mindful of her beautiful new dress, and rested her chin on her fist, resigning herself to waiting for Wyvern to come back to his senses. ...

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