sweetnightmare

I thank you for your thoughts they do mean so much..but i wonder if you read the line right that you are speaking of..... it is ..."Petals fading into black death" sorry for my spelling errors ! Thank you !! Please readers leave more comments !!!

Hey, I like this story, very much potential here!

Twirling like a dizzy ballerina In a smear of water color Pointed toes in silky grace tied slippers Balancing on a needle Crying out into the dark night. Flowing white skirts rippling in the spin Ribbons tied loosely in her hair The melody played on a broken piano Lost in the crowd of wonderers Spinning faster now Tighter circles Speeding heart beats Adrenalin pumping Don’t stop! Don’t stop! Then in the moment of triumph Collapsing on the floor A wounded flower Petals fading into Black Death Dry heaves from overwhelming effort Blood dripping into a puddle Staining the white fabric Eyes open and gazing at the ceiling Romeo’s dagger with red ruby stones Glistening in the dim light On the floor a last dream is there Only as the crowd screams for an encore Do they notice the dance is done? And no more can she dance for them For she is gone!

Winds behind their travels Pushing them along Motivation shoveling the dirt Off the rocky road Ripping the weeds away From the crumbling building Pouring the crystal water On the cracked dry desert floor Endurance pulling the depths of their befuddled souls Through their rough journey Dried earth caked to their dresses Sunburned palms from lying on the ground A Burnt Offering The endless wondering Blisters and calloused feet Never able to stop Always going Trying to find the one place Where they belong Moving from town to town Bed sheets to bedposts Never laying in the comfort for too long Friends never seen again Leaving with the rain storm Winds behind their travels Pushing them along

Sitting on this bed of thorns I remember a time Before all the rest Before the sunrise When the stars still shined And over the daytime passed The shore was told to cease The fog was rolling The sky was paying the toll Winds blew through the clouds Forming the shapes and sizes Images in their minds Doorways to other worlds Seeing the reality in a new way Trying to sway through the waves Jumping off the cliff side Into the choppy water White dress being torn though the rapids Cutting the sides of the rocks Tracing a life down to an instant And leaving alone the past present and future Abandoning the essence of time For a moment of rest A time of peace With out demons With out haunting pictures of frail bodies I remember a time before times When the stars in her eyes shined When we saw castles in our future And dreams in her grasp She was the But she isn’t the And she will never be again For she died at ten When the shore was told to cease For the never ending unease Of a haunted child who was never released From a gripping life Never ending her strife Until the bitter end Of her very life !!!

Expanding on it would make it more, but i seem to like it as blunt and stright forward as it is.

Oh dear, High school sucked! Theydid the same thing to me when i tried to get out early, i was lucky enough to get through and go to college! Don't Worry though...when you do finally get away from it, you will find in the midnight hours when your thoughs stream back, you will be thankful its all over. Then a whole new adventure starts.

Wow, I love your wording it is so inspiring. Sorry i cannot comment much more, i am in school, but wow..... I can see the "Dark Rims" the images you put there...it is simply wonderful....i love the words.

Thank you guys SOOOOOO!@! Much.... Hugs them all*

Endless nights sleepless days tired, worn in so many different ways everthing is strange for far away every thing is new Everything but my love of you or who you were before My muse My inspiration My deepest temptation on my mind but pushed behind nothing to find but a broken glass mirror Shattered, but clearly too little to be seen light that does not shine a song that doesn't rhyme never replaced or forgotten something burning my mind is our time, that we shined and the angels were jealious but no one will tell us now, hatred is the seed a passion spent on greed a love that is forever lost in the trash onto the ground tossed

Do you really think so ?

My little place When the world is unfair When my life seem to be circling Running over and over into a brick wall There is a little place i like to go It is inside my imagination My private little place No one can go there but me In my deep thoughts A lacy veil and starry night sky Candle lit libraries of all my good times A fire place made all cozy and soft Mother's knit blankets Father's lemon tea Body wamth from him When I close my eyes This is all true When all seems gone When hope dies like starlight with the dawn This place brings on the new morning The sunshine chandeliers Ballerina's graceful leap Into a new day With a new way To improve and explore To make another open door No one else can go there In my deep thoughts A lacy veil and starry night sky Candle lit libraries of all my good times A fire place made all cozy and soft Mother's knit blankets Father's lemon tea Body warmth from him When i close my eyes All this is true Being so far from all In any measurement Trying to stand tall Reaching over my head for something better All i need is a stool No one else can go there In the deep thoughts of my mind A lacy veil and starry night sky Candle lit libraries of my whole life through A fire place made all cozy and soft Mother's knit blankets Father's lemon tea Body warmth from him When i close my eyes This is all true

Very good! I love the feeling that i see behind it.

Tell me My LAdy, is this better? thank you agian for your thoughts, they mean so much to me.

Thank You.....

Thanks guys

Pulls out 50lbs eraser, and starts thinking of a better way to put it...* "Then out of the dry crackling ground" Instead of " then all of a sudden" Is it better now ?

Spelling....emm...yeah i need a little help where that is concerned. Mac's don't really have the greatest spell check. Help me out

I like this poem. I like the imagry, i can picture it happening....and at the end, the chocolate to death wins. LOL I think it is very original

A desert Flower Like a dry and desolate desert People looked upon me Dirt, thorns, a poison bite I can hurt people I can dry them up Grasping them with my twisted weeds, Driving them toward insanity They can hurt me Treat me like garbage Dry hot days left me alone Then a drop of rain A cloud of dark gray Gentle slits of angel tears soaking in my dry plains A swift of spring A dash of magic Then out of the dry crackling ground Beauty in a desert flower Dry bitterness, broiling heat waves of malice Seasons of resentment The angel's sweet kiss of forgiveness The magic and power In a single desert flower EDIT: spelling gently fixed by request

YaY!!! :woot: Suddenly at the sound of her voice and exsitment, she backs off a little and smiles* Thank you...

bravo. bravo She screams and cheers* i like it. It shows alot about friends and the relationship between how it should be

peredhil, Starts by taking his hand in hers* I am new, and i dont know what inspired you to write this as other seem to know, but i do know that your words tell enough. It is hard when you feel this way, but i wanted you to know that even as little as i know you, and from all i have read...you are an amazing person... and everyone here seems to care..never forget that. You gave me confort eariler today about posting my writing...now i wish i could give you comfort about who you are Believe in it i loved your poem, it brings me comfort as well, becasue i am so far from home and in a whole new place. I value you in my new world. Keep writing And have a flower

Wow, i really like this, it seems to explain to clearly... the imagry is good yes, the meaning or maybe the way you feel, "On tiptoes, I lean Forward" i like that. It just means so much in few words.

Looks at the notice* " Do oppertunities like this come often in the place?" " The agian it makes sence to look for writers in a place like this, It maks me wonder how many people look at the work here and who they are."