Guest Phoenix Posted December 22, 2007 Report Share Posted December 22, 2007 candles wound around their wicks flick starlight off the candlesticks faces waver in their light voices spiral and take flight woven harmonies express mutual inner happiness all our hopes and dreams take flight vanish like music in the night carolling around the tree manger fills the scenery celebrating hope's rebirth celebrating all of earth Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wyvern Posted December 26, 2007 Report Share Posted December 26, 2007 Nice poem, Phoenix. :-) You paint a nice picture of the carolers and the emotion behind their caroling, with the first stanza and its vivid details of the candles and their effect on the caroler faces standing out to me in particular. The second stanza was also well done in its depiction of the shared feelings between the carolers, though the word choice of "vanish" in the fourth line of the stanza seemed odd to me. The poem generally seems to be a positive depiction of carolers, but the thought of their "hopes and dreams" vanishing into the night seemed to carry a more negative tone to me. Wyvern bows his head to Phoenix, then plugs his ears with Almost Dragonic Brand Granite Golem Pixysticks in the hopes of avoiding the grating sounds of Christmas cheer, with the fear of Racouol's festive renditions standing out in particular... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Degorram Posted December 27, 2007 Report Share Posted December 27, 2007 Wow Phoenix! Very cool. Your poem, as it suggests, just seemed woven together. I liked this piece very much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Patrick Posted January 16, 2008 Report Share Posted January 16, 2008 Cool poem. The first two lines felt quite a bit stronger than the rest of the poem to me, possibly because of several words ending "ick(s)". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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