Fun with Stealth Sprites

[Wyvern]

"Oh come on Gorgmorsh, I thought we had a deal!" Wyvern curses through his teeth as he walks down a long cooridor towards the Pen's Library. He shakes a portable crystal ball in his claw, grimacing at its piss poor mana reception. Gorgmorsh's warthog face wasn't much to look at to begin with, and the blurry image through the crystal wasn't helping any. "Look, listen. Any orc priest with half the half a brain you have would know I'm giving you a bargain. I'm telling you, Almost Dragonic Brand Broken Bottle Beerkeg Ornaments™ are the next step in weapons of mass destruction. I mean these things are pointy!"

 

Wyvern flashes one of his full-toothed grins, only to go sour as he finds a receptionless cloud of smoke where Gorgmorsh's face had once been. Wyvern wraps both claws around the tiny ball in frustration, then crams it into one of his pockets with a repressed almost roar. The lizard picks up his pace a bit and storms down the hall, shaking his head and gritting his teeth in frustration.

 

"That'sss what I get for pawning it off one o' those escape artist magiciansss." Wyvern rolls his eyes and clenches his claws as he walks. He steps over a bulge on the floor with a *snap.* "And he had a perfectly good rubber turkey that I could have gotten to bend Zool's Rubber Chicken to my will, but nooooo, I had to take the crysta-"

 

Wyvern pauses as he notices something laying behind him in the hallway. The lizard turns to view the spot he had just stepped over, and stares at it for a long moment. He blinks at the body of a lifesize crouching ninja, fully-suited in black spandex, slumped over the area where he'd been walking. The lizard steps forward to examine the ninja closer, only to notice that his neck has been snapped under what appears to be an almost dragonic footprint. Wyvern bites his lip and glances in both directions, wondering if he's responsible for cleaning it up. He nudges the ninja with a foot to make sure it's not just a "minor" snapped neckbone, only to watch in disbelief as the ninja's suite suddenly seems to deflate until nothing but the costume itself remains. The lizard scratches his scaly head, then shrugs and plucks the spandex suite up with his tail stinger as he continues walking.

 

"Hmph..." Wyvern walks down the hall and turns the corner to the double-doors leading to the Library. "I wonder what that was doing the-AAA!"

 

Wyvern's jaw drops as he stares at the four ninjas present in the Library, each of them wearing the exact same tacky black spandex suite. All four of the ninjas were occupied with the Library's book racks, reordering the books so that they were no longer alphabetized.

 

"Hey!"

 

Wyvern raises a claw, only to watch the ninjas burst into an escape and dash off in different directions. One ninja jumps in a somersault towards the window, not realizing that it's shut and breaking his neck with a *snap* upon impact. Two of the other ninjas perform impressive cartwheels across the room, moving in two semi-circles that eventually end with the two of them crashing into each other, their neck bones breaking with a *snap snap.* The fourth ninja scales one of the bookshelves and climbs into an airduct, disappearing from sight.

 

"Hunh." Wyvern raises a claw to his chin, watching the three broken ninjas deflate as he wanders into the Library. "Must just be a coincidence..."

 

Wyvern nods to himself, only to freeze up as he notices two unfamiliar shadows moving along the wall. The lizard promptly panicks and rushes over to a Library table holding a large tome entitled "Everything You Wanted to Know About Pests But Were Afraid to Ask." The lizard frantically flips through the book until he finds an entry for "ninja" somewhere between "aphid" and "silverfish." The lizard quickly skims over the page, trying to keep his cool.

 

Ninja infestations are often the result of stealth sprites... countless apparitions caused by a wiley group of tiny tricksters... harmless and half-real, the ninjas are not violent and cannot attack or defend themselves, but are better at annoying people than your average housebug... the ninjas can be broken with a single swat, but will remain endless until their stealth sprite sources are captured and properly scolded... ninja apparition activities may include displaying poor fashion sense, disorganizing, distracting, and the occasional theft.

 

"Uh oh." Wyvern gulps and wipes some sweat from his brow. "I wonder how bad it is."

[Degorram]

Degorram sucked on the edge of her quill, thinking of what to write down next. Her current book was plaguing her again: here it was at 2 am and she had dragged herself out of her comfy bed only to be faced with a writers block. The very idea irked her. In rage she dipped her quill into the ink and scribbled quickly at the bottom of the page, 'And everybody died! The End.'

 

"There you nasty creature!" she spat, throwing the quill, still wet, against the wall. "Take that and never bother me again." Of course, she new well that in the morning she would scratch the two sentences out and start afresh on her ending. Degorram, though exhausted, also new that she wouldn't sleep the rest of the night. Even as the words had failed to slipp through her fingers and onto paper, they whirled around in her brain, whittling away at her concentration. So she sat next to the window, staring out into the night, her fingers toying a book thong. Her jet black hair faded into bright red, to purple, to red, back to black, and over and over again until her face was framed by what resembled the flashing of an angry squid. She flicked her tail hungrily like a cat stalking its prey as she picked through various words and phrases.

 

The rooftops of the Pen complex spread dark and mysterious below her window. High up in the Conservatory Tower where she spent most of her days (when she wasn't lurking in the Assembly Room far below on the streets) she could see everything. Degorram could almost sense the different minds sleeping soundly, their own thoguths giving them pleasant dreams....or nightmares. This was a new power she was developing, and she knew she should be careful....but why not? They were all asleep anyway and she was bored out of her mind. Closing her eyes she sought a friend and entered their dreams, delighting in the various images that floated before her eyes. With a mischievous and throughly nasty chuckle she prodded the dream her own way and continued to watch. So she could give and change dreams too! Wonderful....

 

Degorram was pulled sharply from her dream casting when a noise blasted into her senses. She winced and looked around. She had let her defenses slip while she was busy: normally she was concious enough, even when sleeping, to guard her well attuned senses against noises and smells. Her eyes focused in on the noise maker down on the roof. And she stared and stared.

 

A black shadow had fallen in an ungainly manner onto one of the lower rooftops. The person picked themselves up with a groan and looked back up at the tower. Their eyes connected and Degorram got a flash of white to pay for it. When her eyes cleared from the flash grenade, the shadow was gone. Not a second later, Degorram had morphed halfway across the Pen complex to stand outside one of her sister's door. Raising a fist she pounded loudly on it, shouting at the top of her lungs. "KIKUYU BLACK PAWS WAKE YOUR LAZY BUTT UP!"

[Kikuyu_Black_Paws]

Kikuyu opened her eyes slowly....very slowly. And the look she cast at the door was as baleful as any. Hauling herself from under her very fluffy covers, groaning as she pulled on a netted shirt and ninja shift, she stumbled to the door, her dark hair rumpled from sleep. Some short layered ends on the back of her head stuck straight up from where she had rested against her pillow. She yanked the door open, and almost recieved Degorram's fist in her face. She jerked back, grabbing the inkstained hand and glaring. "What are you doing waking me up at 3 am in the morning, Dego," she hissed dangerously. "I happen to like my sleep, unlike some."

 

Dego glared at her. "I thought you were a ninja: don't you like the nighttime?"

 

Kikuyu's eyes narrowed even more. "I do. When I'm awake"

 

Dego waved a hand dismissively. "Well, you're awake now. You'll want to hear this." Dego shoved past Kikuyu. The still sleepy ninja stood in the door, nodding off again until Dego grabbed her by the shoulder and shut the door.

 

Kikuyu walked into her kitchen barefoot, shivering as her toes touched the cold tile. She poured herself a hot glass of tea from the pot ever ready on her stove. Some thought it stupid to keep the stove running all the time, and considered it a fire hazard. Foolish people.

 

Kikuyu sipped at her steaming beverage and sat down on her bed, fully awake and still very irritated. "Well, I'm awake. Are you going to give me your reason for getting me up at the buttcrack of dawn?"

 

Dego ran her fingers through her hair, as always trying to find the words that would accurately echo her thoughts. Kikuyu rolled her eyes as the seconds dripped past. "Alright," Dego said finally. "I think I saw a ninja outside my window."

 

Kikuyu perked her ears forward. "You think?"

 

Dego cast her sister a whithering glare. "There was a flash grenade. Anyway, it could be a rogue. Whoever it was just slammed into a roof and then disappeared."

 

Kikuyu rubbed her chin. "There have been other sightings...strange ninjas running amok and causing trouble." She grimaced. "At first one of the Elders came and asked me if I was the one who had stolen his I *heart* Wyvern mug." Dego's eyes widened but Kikuyu waved her off. "Don't ask me why he would have it. I think it has something to do with the Mythical I Wyvern Club." Kikuyu stood and moved over to her huge window. It practically consumed her farthest wall and she stretched her arms above her head as she gazed out of it, her back muscles writhing. "If there are rogue ninjas out there," she hissed, "I'll find them."

 

When Dego had gone, Kikuyu pulled on her clothing. Slowly, carefully, she wrapped her left arm and her legs from knees to calves. She tied her headband about her bicep and pulled a vest over her netted shirt. Buckling on her belt of shurikan and strapping a katana to her back, she opened her window and crept out, still barefoot. For stealth missions close to home, what kind of shoes were needed?

 

The night was still, only a faint breeze stirring the few trees that scattered the Pen Complex. It's slithering, hissing noise emulated that of a faraway river, and the moon was large and silver against the navy sky. Kikuyu rolled her shoulders, further awakening her body from the deep, unconscious recesses of her sleep. And then in a flash she had leapt from the ceiling.

 

She landed in the branches of a tree, eyeing her surroundings. And she waited.

 

It didn't take long. Far off across the city, near the Library and Banquet Hall a flash of blinding white light reached to the sky and then was gone. With a grunt Kikuyu lifted herself into the air with a shove of her legs and bounded across the complex, hugging the shadows, eyes never blinking as she hunted her prey.

 

Another flash kept her on her course. Then a crash as if a trashcan had been overturned. Soon the signs led her to a dead end. Kikuyu stood in the only exit, peering up at the five story buildings that made up the walls around her. No way out there: the walls were too far apart for jumping and the surfaces to slick for climbing. So where was...

 

A shurikan almost buried itself in her face as it whipped past her. Only supreme reflexes and a high of caffein allowed her to step aside in time, recieving only a small scratch. She looked up to see a ninja standing imperiously on the top of the wall, staring down at her with a mischevious glare. Facial features were hidden by a mask, but his eyes gleamed with wicked, introverted laughter. Kikuyu shot forward. She grinned gimly: let her dazzle this amateur with her skills!

 

Her bare feet found crevaces in the walls that no boot could find. Easily and smoothly she skipped up the wall and pulled herself up, landing on her feet easily, holding out her hands in readiness for combat. A small, eager smile twisted her pale features as she glared at the ninja before her. She drew her katana and held it behind her.

 

The ninja lifted his hand and threw something at his feet. Instinctively Kikuyu narrowed her eyes so as not to be blinded by another flash grenade, but this time the suffocating hiss of gass exploded in her ears. Kikuyu leapt away swiftly, searching for the again hidden ninja. She sighed. Imature little rat...this was going to be a long, long night.

Edited December 6, 2006 by Kikuyu Black Paws

[Degorram]

Once her conversation with Kikuyu had ended, Degorram had instantly morphed back to her room, throwing her closet doors open with a wave of her hand. Clothing flew past her in a wild flurry as her now red eyes flickered past each outfit. No...no, that wouldn't do....definitely not! She cursed and dove into the closet herself. Where was that durned thing? How was she supposed to seek out ninjas with her sister in her pajamas for goodness sake?

 

Finally she found it: her jugglers outfit from her teens. She didn't bother to wonder how it had ended up at the bottom of her closet, even though she wore it every day.

 

Pulling it on she looked at herself. The black pants and tanktop fit perfectly, not too tight, and not too loose. The duster coat she wore over it went down to her wrists where her fingerless gloves hugged her large hands. The coat's skirt-back hung down to her ankles, swaying gently as she walked. Quickly Degorram slipped her favorite juggler's knives into her boots and snatched her scythe from its position of leaning against the wall. Not that this was abnormal dress or weaponry for Degorram: two things she always carried around were he scythe and an enchanted quill.

 

With a *pop* she was gone, standing in the library where she had sensed Wyvern's almost-dragonic presence. And there before her was the dragon himself, flipping through a book. Silently she stood behind him and tapped his shoulder. "Do you knwo what's with the half-wit ninjas?"

Edited December 7, 2006 by Degorram

[Mynx]

Mynx lay sprawled on the bed in her quarters and sighed wearily, ears semi flattened in boredom. Her blind eyes were turned to a pair of her kitten minions. Dancing and playing with each other on the floor, their auras created a haze of dancing colours akin to a fireworks display or light show.

 

Since the accident with the runes, Mynx had slowly been developing her other senses to compensate for the loss of vision, but was growing restless with how long it was taking her. By normal standards she was progressing rapidly, already at a level of awareness most blind people would envy. But the perfectionist that was Mynx was far from happy.

The biggest problem was finding willing targets to practice with.

 

Cryptomancer had been more than happy to help the feline redevelop her fighting, but she had grown so used to his aura and fighting style that she was struggling to successfully make the step to fighting strangers or more than one apparation. And anything that had no aura was beyond the cat's reach at the moment, leaving her in somewhat of a foul mood about the matter.

 

The best way to combat this, she eventually concluded, was to focus further on her - or the cat's - mortal senses. But with only the kitten minions willing to be stalked, Mynx was hitting the same problem as she had been with Cryptomancer.

 

A sudden scuttling noise on the wall distracted Mynx from her darkening thoughts, the minions ceasing their gambolling in an instant as they turned to stare at the source of the noise. Ears pricked at the scuttling noises Mynx searched the wall for any hint of a foreign aura. Failing to find anything, she reached down a paw to the floor, picking up the first minion that came within reach. Lifting the kitten until it was about level with her head, Mynx muttered a chant and palced her paw on the minion's head.

 

After a moment or two, Mynx was able to make out the wall of her quarters through the minion's sight. She hated channeling sight this way, but sometimes had no choice. Blinking (from habit more than anything) in surprise at the ninja crawling over her wall, Mynx pulled a sai from her belt and flung it without thinking. It hit the ninja square in the chest, imbedding it to the wall with a *snap*. Mynx grumbled to herself (she'd been aiming for the head), before breaking the sight spell with the minon and moving to retrieve her sai from the wall.

 

The feline was surprised when all she found of the ninja was its outfit, pinned to the wall by her sai. Pulling the material loose as she pocketed the weapon, Mynx inspected the texture of the fabric with her paws, before sniffing it. There was the barest hint of a scent, enough to tell the cat that what she'd killed was obviously not human. As to what it was...well...that remained to be seen.

 

Mynx smiled bitterly at the last thought.

 

Another sound outside distracted her. More scuttling. It sounded like the Pen was infested with...whatever the ninja things really were. Seeing the opportunity to actually stalk something that wasn't trying to get caught, Mynx grinned to herself and slunk out of her quarters, ears and nose straining to pick up her newfound quarry.

[Kikuyu_Black_Paws]

Kikuyu grinned grimly as she saw her prey come in sight. The ninja in black was leaping across buildings, heading straight for the tower. She pulled out a Shurikan. "Oy! You! Stop right there!"

 

The ninja turned his head to look over at her....and smashed straight into the tower with a *snap*. The ninja fell back and promptly deflated.

 

Kikuyu skidded slowly to a halt and stared blankly at the shriveled mess on the roof before her. The hair on the back of her neck prickled and she felt herself beginning to gape.

 

What the...?

 

Suddenly there was a scuttle behind her. She whirled. At first she thought her eyes were playing bizarre caffien induced tricks on her. There was another one of the pests. And another!!!

 

Soon there were six of the poorly dressed, spandex-ed ninjas before her, all staring. Kikuyu began to feel very disoriented and uncomfortable. "Shoo," she commanded.

 

The ninjas scuttled closer. Kikuyu backed away. "What are you doing?" As one got too close Kikuyu tried to punch it in the face. It gave way with a strangled squeak and a small *snap* and then deflated like a leaky balloon.

 

Kikuyu was definetley seeing things!!! Without a word she leapt around the tower and headed home. She needed sleep, and fast!

 

As soon as she entered her room she knew things were not as they should be. Her entire home...her beautiful room...

 

WAS RUINED!!!!! Her books were rumpled and out of order, lying on the floor, her kettle was on the ground and the stove was turned OFF! Her clothing was torn out of the closet and her weapons were covered in axle grease. She thought she could see bananna peels littering the floor. And there was definetly a loaded whoopie cushion on her chair!!!

 

Her peircing shriek could be heard all over the town.

 

Kikuyu flew through the town, her hair even more unruly because of her restless and very agitated fingers flying through it. Where was Dego? Where was Wyvern? He had to have one of his...what were they, Almost Dragonic somethings to help with this!! Again the image of disarray in her room caused a sob of horror to tear from her throat.

 

Where oh where was Wyvern?

[Quincunx]

Rydia, with her hair tied up to protect its glossiness, hummed and swished while cleaning the inside of the snug little cave-home. She polished the black leather of Starlight's sexy chair, plumped the purple pillows of Starlight's comfy chair, and applied a grounded vacuum-cleaner nozzle to the air vents of Starlight's high-tech chair. She placed a fresh cat treat in front of the empty, covered cat basket. Portals opened up in its interior sometimes; Carbone had wandered through once, as well as at least three kitten minions. She twinkletoed over to a broom and started sweeping the floorboards, but one ear perked straight up as she heard some out-of-place noise, and the cat treat had disappeared while her back was turned!

 

She froze, then shifted her grip on the broom. Her ears tracked the faint skittering noises, at first spreading apart to triangulate, then locking on a point somewhere behind the elf, and moving forward. . .closer. . .closer. . .Rydia jabbed upwards with the broom, shrieking, "Shoo!" The broom handle met resistance for a moment, but it snapped, and black fabric floated down around the handle as it thumped into the rock ceiling. She shrieked again, wordless surprise this time, dropped the broom, and fled to a far corner. Once the deflated suit had fluttered to the floor, she inched out of the corner and picked it up with her fingernails, and her ears slowly relaxed.

 

"It's not Minta? Thank goodness," she breathed. She turned the fabric inside-out, investigated the weave (double-knit, as it turned out), inspected the seams, checked for care tags, and found nothing useful. Rydia sat in her own shiny green comfy chair and turned the suit over in her hands while musing. There was nothing wrong about ninjas trying to get into the house, that's what ninjas did, but it was still a bit odd after taking the house's wards into consideration. Also you couldn't sweep them onto a piece of paper and put them outside, as you could with spiders. . .could you? She lay the suit across the arm of the chair, retrieved and put away the broom, then picked up the suit again and went upstairs to the door. Rydia needed to find a ninja expert.

[Degorram]

Degorram blinked and looked around, then cursed under her breath. She could have sworn under torture that Wyvern had been standing in front of her. But when she had tapped his shoulder, he had fallen over and turned out to be a cardboard standup. Curse that sneaky devil! she thought savagely. Of all the times to pull something like that.Sighing, she walked away to the opposite side of the library, completely alone. She absently rubbed the leather straps that covered her arms and legs. What now? As the shape shifter thought, her skin and clothes began to change color until they completely matched the colors of her background. Invisible, she walked away, senses completely unguarded. She didn't want to miss anything. Even though these ninjas were complete clutses and severely incompetent ones at that, she didn't trust anything. Whatever was controlling the annoyances in black spandex was darker, more mysterious. Anything that made their minions where spandex had to be sick in the head.

 

She walked the cold streets of the Pen complex in silence, thinking. And for once it wasn't about made up stories. The tale that swirled in her head was her own, very real and very painful. She was so distracted that she nearly bumped into someone in the dark. Luckily she dodged around in time to avoid disaster.

 

The person was a tall female with cat ears(?). Her shimmering hair was tied up into a pony tail and draped over one arm she held one of the black outfits the ninjas had been spiriting around in. Degorram listened hard and heard the last words of 'find a ninja expert'. Letting her invisibility drop, she walked up next to the person and prayed that this time they wouldn't turn out to be a piece of cardboard....

 

(can we write about other people or is this strictly writing our own and hoping we're noticed?)

[Kikuyu_Black_Paws]

Kikuyu rushed through the Pen complex, searching for the one they called Wyvern. Where was he?! Then it came to her: the Library! He sould be in the Library.

 

Kikuyu slammed through the doors and cast her eyes over the lobby. A chill ran over her spine and she whirled to the left. A ninja in black spandex was hiding tax papers under wastebaskets and yet another was hanging upside-down on the ceiling, pulling faces with its mask. Suddenly it lost its footing and fell on its head with a *snap*, breaking its neck and deflating. Kikuyu threw a shurikan at the next ninja and it deflated as well.

 

I don't have time for this! Kikuyu thought as she hurried towards the library. Where was Wyvern? She hesitantly called out his name, but the eaves of the Library shushed her soundly and she inched forward in silence, mortified. To the hissed at by the very building...she must have been yelling loudly.

 

As she entered the doors Kikuyu paused. There was a tome on the table nearest the doors, lying open. It looked something like a dictionary. Claw marks dented the pages recently and there was a faint smell...like Dragonic Cologne...Wyvern had been here. Kikuyu moved forward hesitantly and flipped through it. A pest book of some kind...it had everything from silverfish, soot-sprites, jumping spiders, class-clowns, and talk-show hosts. She was trying to read an article on "Realtors", but a strange buzzing and tapping combination was irritating her. She looked up to find where the noise was coming from and saw a ninja hanging over her head, buzzing at her and tapping on the ceiling. When her gaze fell upon it, it scuttled backwards in an impressive display of ceiling walking. But when it got to the wall it slipped and broke its neck, deflating.

 

Kikuyu looked all around the library now. It was infested with ninjas! Pulling out and resorting the index cards backwards, so that A was at F and Q was at L and X was at B...it would take forever to clean this up! Other ninjas were dumping the fake potted plants on the ground and then smearing the dirt with their leafy tops. The library cat, named Cat, hissed visciously at them from under a desk.

 

Kikuyu grimaced and hurried past. They needed an exterminator. As she hurried up the stairs, she saw several ninjas rush together carrying a giant globe, only to slide on the dumped potting mix and get crushed under the shape of Asia with several *snap*s. Soon only spandex remained.

 

Kikuyu took the stairs two at a time now, but as she reached the top she paused. There was a creaking of a door ahead, and the portal to an office slowly swung outwards. A foot sounded on the wooden floor of the hall. Someone was coming.

Edited December 9, 2006 by Kikuyu Black Paws

[Scarlett O'Harpy]

And not just any old foot. A size 6 right foot within a crimson high-heeled shoe. The left shoe, although also crimson-ish, was scuffed and stumpy - lending Harpy a lumbering lop-sided gait that was in turns alarming and comical. Scarlett floundered into Kikuyu, windmilled her arms, waggled her nose and finally in defeat, dumped herself into an untidy pile on the floor.

 

'Mmm-mm-mmm' the red lips were straining, but nothing coherent was coming out. Harpy flexed her kisser, pouted vainly, but the mouth stayed absolutely shut. Scarlett's eyes (perhaps to compensate) were insanely wide open as if to communicate something of vital national importance. She punctuated each 'Mmmm' with a flourish of her detached six-inch spiked heel, which she clutched with the fervour of one who means to get even.

 

Concluding that no amount of facial distortion was going to get her point across, Harpy jabbed her heel furiously down into the floor, scoring a deep line into the tile in the process. Her eyes locked onto the line and within seconds she had added further wild scratches to her message:

 

-- Find Cerulean!

 

 

edited for spelling

Edited December 10, 2006 by Scarlett O'Harpy

[Wyvern]

"Damndamndamn, I knew that 'Pirate vs. Ninja' thing was gonna be trouble one way or another." Wyvern shook his cracked portable crystal ball as he dashed through the Pen's Piazza of Portraits, ignoring the site of ninjas hanging from ceiling fixtures and cursing at his broken communication device. The Almost Dragonic Brand Life-Sized Cardboard Cuddling Wyvern for Women™ that he'd set up in the Library had obviously flopped as hard on the ninjas as it had on its original intended audience. The spandex bandits were everywhere. "Gonna need more security measures for the next 'Talk like a Pirate Day...' Hey! Get away from those!"

 

Wyvern pulled out an Almost Dragonic Brand Almost-a-Dragonfly Swatter™ and waved it at a group of ninjas doodling moustaches on some very fine Pen portraits. The ninjas promptly dispersed from the area in a series of impressive backflips, leaving Wyvern with an out-of-joint snout. The overgrown lizard wandered up to the Portraits the ninjas had doodled upon and wiped the moustaches off of Black and Horace's pictures... only to pause at lumpenproletariat's picture, noting how the facial hair made him look kind of similar to Stalin. The lizard pondered whether he should keep it there or not and contemplated contacting a serious art critic for further evaluation, only to remember that he had an urgent message to spread.

 

"Yeeeeesh, they ARE good at distracting..."

 

Wyvern rammed past two ninjas and dashed through an arched doorway, racing down a hall until he passed by a door with light seeping through its cracks. The reptilian Elder barged through the door and into Mynx's sleeping quarters with all the ettiquette of a drunken barbarian, freezing as he noticed the spandex she held in her paws.

 

"Mynx, we need to-" Wyvern's tongue became tied as he stared across the room and through the pane of Mynx's window, his eyes widening at the site of a figure dressed in black. A ninja, staring into the room from one of Wyvern's usual spying spots. "Mynx, lookout!"

 

Wyvern held his Almost Dragonic Brand Almost-a-Dragonfly Swatter™ up high and let out a pipsqueak warcry, charging at the site of the ninja and not recognizing the figure as Degorram in his panicking state...

 

;-)

[Cerulean]

Cerulean’s room lay empty. The ceiling-length skylight was open, flooding the room with cool night air, but nobody sat appreciating the speckled skyscape. A soft violet aura permeated the stillness – a usual consequence of Cerulean and Scarlett having coincided, but there was nothing otherwise odd about the scene.

 

Helga’s basking stone, highly polished by Cerulean, was positioned exactly where tomorrow’s noon sun would strike it. A tortoise’s tray of assorted stems had been recently nibbled and an ancient Phantasm tome - crack-spined and yellowing sat open on the floor atop the Persian rug.

 

The woman had been reclusive of late; she’d taken the loss of her feline companion badly, the second loss worse still. Helga was excellent company and all, but you couldn’t bury your face in a shell. Nothing smelled like the dry dusty warmth of her cats and nothing would replace their fourteen year reign. Cerulean had avoided Scarlett as far as possible, fearing the other’s matter-of-factness. Harpy took a pragmatic perspective, pets were convenient foodstuff surely.

 

Gradually the emptiness of the room receded as Helga hurtled in, neck craned forward, beady eyes popping. There was a scrap of spandex astride her shell squeaking ‘Giddyups!’ and chuckling. Helga headed full pelt for the stone where she intended to scrape away the unwelcome guest, but was startled motionless by the stir of air above her head. Helga’s neck grew smooth as it extended fully allowing her to gaze upward at the open skylight. Parachuting ninjas fell like petals in the breeze, Helga gulped.

[Mynx]

"What the...?" Mynx looked up at the warsqueak, ears flattened as she recognised the Almost-Dragon charging towards her. She hissed instinctively and grabbed Wyvern as he charged past her, intending to stop him before he completely destroyed her quarters. But it was to no avail. Stumbling into the feline, Wyvern was so focussed on his quarry that he kept going, dragging Mynx off her paws and sending the both of them crashing through the window and into Degorram.

Coughing as the dust settled, Mynx was the first to haul herself out of the tangle. Turning to the ruined wall that completed her quarters, all the feline could see was the auras of some of her belongings scattered all around them, the only trace of the wall to her limited visibility was a jagged circle around what had used to be her window.

Growling, Mynx stormed over to Wyvern and picked him up by the scruff of his neck.

"What in all the nine hells do you think you were doing?!" she snarled.

Wyvern coughed and began to stammer.

"There was a ninja at your window! I was defending you from..." glancing over Mynx's shoulder, the Almost-Dragon finally recognised Degorram as she dusted the debri off her clothes. Swallowing, he turned his eyes back to Mynx and, forgetting her lack of sight, attempted a sheepish smile.

"...oops?"

[Degorram]

Degorram was less than pleased. Not only had she allowed herself to be mistaken as one of the incompetant ninja, of all the unholy things to be mistaken as, but she had also been caught off guard by Wyvern's rather un-warlike warcry. She looked at her dust covered clothes and her eyes flamed with irritation. A burst of her power threw the dust off of her in every direction with a loud puff that resembled the opposite of a vacuum. Her eyes blazing red, her hair darkening to black, she turned on Wyvern and raised an eyebrow. "Ooops? I think that may be an understatement. Do I look like I'm wearing spandex? Am I deflating in any shape, form, or fashion at all?" The shapeshifter snorted and turned away, stretching her arm out. Her scythe flew up from the ground and into her gloved hand and she returned to scowl at the almost-dragonic being. "You're lucky I didn't take your head off."

 

Degorram stiffened. Something was coming....fast. And in her brain she felt a connection that read out NINJA. But whether it was Kikuyu or one of the annoying Stealth Sprites was hard to tell, for the speed at which it approached was far too great. She turned towards the already gaping hole in the wall and peered into the night.

[Kikuyu_Black_Paws]

Kikuyu ran hard from Scarlet on the ground. She had to find Wyvern in order to find Cerulean. Kikuyu was new and didn't know many of the Pen's inhabitants, but Wyvern was sure to know. All caution and skills thrown to the winds, Kikuyu charged from the library, focusing her mind upon the location of her sister. She had to get help, and fast.

 

The tingling that located her sister turned left, then right, and then left again. She leapt over a park bench, climbed the tower, and bulldozed through a crowd of ninjas trying to stuff themselves into a phone booth. There were various snaps and deflating, and the remaining ninjas chuckled as they stuffed the spandex suits into the phone booth as well.

 

Barely looking where she was going, Kikuyu charged into a complex of private dorms and then up an elevator. She burst into a room and tripped over Wyvern's tail, landing in the dogpile that had only just begun to clean itself up. Somehow Kikuyu ended up underneath all the rest again, with Degorram glaring at her from above, somehow twisted upside-down. Mynx yowled in the background and Wyvern was waving a large fly-swatter in the air.

 

"I was just wondering where you were!" Kikuyu said brightly. "Hey Wyvern, who's Cerulean? Scarlet wants her."

[Degorram]

"IN ALL THE BLUE BLAZES OF OASIS FLAME, WILL YOU GET OFF OF ME!?!" Degorram shrieked. A whirlwind cut through the room and picked the three who were piled on top of her up, tossing them ungently onto the floor next to her. Degorram growled and sat up, now thoroughly peeved. "Reckless fart brained buffoon! Watch where you're going next time or I'll start using stronger insults!"

[Kikuyu_Black_Paws]

Kikuyu bristled. "Fart brained yourself! Do you know how long it took me to find you? In the whole Pen complex you had to be here!"

 

Kikuyu turned on Wyvern, in no sweet temper now. "And YOU!" she growled. "Do you know how long it took me to find YOU? I've been everywhere! Why can't you just be in your office when I need you! In all the stormy seas of Oasis ocean, why did you have to go running all over the place?"

[Mardrax]

Two white arrows were chalked on the floor, somewhere inside the bowels of the Pen living quarters area.

An intersection of paths, one arrow leading away from him, pointing into the right corridor. The other arrow its exact mirror, leading from the opposite corridor, pointing at the corridor on the left.

 

He yawned.

She hadn't been able to sleep, and ofcourse, the neighbour had had to suffer.

No wonder that room was empty before. And to believe he was actually paying Wyvern rent for it.

On to the matter of the day though.

She had enticed him into a game of hide and seek spanning the entire keep.

She would mark the way to her to make it easier. Sure. His sleepy mouth had agreed before his head could fully register the question.

 

This wouldn't be the first time she had tried to trick him. He had to admit, there were some keen brains in that small head of hers. Then again, he really was just slow. But was she really that fast to run full circle?

He shrugged and turned right.

 

A few turns later, he noticed a scrawling on the floor. Now that was just mean. "Find Cerulean"? Now how was he supposed to do that? He barely even knew Cerulean. Sure. He had seen her on occasion, but it wasn't as if he knew her enough to know where to find her. And now he had to, just to ask her where the girl had gone.

He didn't even know where to start looking.

Mardrax shrugged and continued walking slowly, searching for a room with light shining from under the door to indicate another insomniac occupant. This was as good a place as any to start looking.

[Wyvern]

Wyvern twitched his wings and tail with a crack of lesser bones, embedded upsidedown in one of the Pen's outdoor walls through the force of Degorram's Blue Blazes of Oasis Flame Whirlwind®. The overgrown lizard raised a shaky half-conscious hand to rub his aching horns, only to suddenly slip off of the wall and fall face first onto the Pen terrace, his snout landing inches away from Mynx's tangled tail. Wyvern painfully flipped himself over and began slowly searching for something to grab onto to pull himself up. Enticing misinterpretations of Kikuyu's "Scarlett wants Cerulean" statement continued dancing through the reptilian Elder's head.

 

"Wuzza?" Wyvern nudged himself up to a sitting position, only to freeze and have his eyes go crooked as he found both Degorram and Kikuyu glaring at him.

 

"This tanktop and skirted coat don't even belong to the same clothing category as spandex! Explain yourself, lizard!"

 

"Degorram..." Wyvern croaked, feebly lifting his Almost Dragonic Brand Almost-a-Dragonfly Swatter™. "Careful... a ninja, beside you..."

 

"A ninja?!" Kikuyu gritted her teeth and stomped her foot down on Wyvern's face. "How dare you mistake my attire for mere spandex! And after being nowhere to be found. I oughta..."

 

"Waaaaiiiit." Wyvern squealed and raised his claws as the two girls pointed their razor-sharp shurikens in his direction. He quickly scrambled to his feet and stretched his joints into relative shape. "Now listen, I'm sssorry for my mistakes, but we have no time for petty things like the fabric of shirts and my lengthy criminal tracking record. There are urgent matters to attend to, and we've gotta work together."

 

Wyvern scratched his chin with one claw, twirling his tail with the other.

 

"Our first two priorities are finding Cerulean and defending Orlan's ultra-expensive Armani shirts. I'll go with Mynx to see if we can't draw Cerulean from her quarters... I think she'sss been missing the feline touch as of late, so a visit from Mynx might be just the thing. Plus, if Scarlett really wants Cerulean as badly as I imagine she wants her, it really would be better that I go." Wyvern cleared his throat for a minute and wiped a small dribble of blood from his snout. "That leaves you two in charge of defending Orlan's sexy sexy wardrobe. We'll find a way to dispatch of the stealth sprites behind this mess, but until then, we need a pair of fashion medics such as yourselves to make sure that no ninjas doodle ANY Americanized haikus over Orlan's stylish shirt selection. His quarters should be easy to find, we'll meet up at Mynx's window remains in an hour or so. Move out!"

 

With that, Wyvern grabbed Mynx by the tail and began dragging her unconscious body in the direction of Cerulean's chambers, not sparing a second to glance at the shadows of ninjas flitting between the trees...

[Kikuyu_Black_Paws]

Kikuyu watched, stunned, as the quick-talking Wyvern disappeared...again. She turned to Degorram with a confused look on her face. "Did Wyvern just ask us to defend clothing?"

 

Degorram's expression was, naturally, identical to Kikuyu's. "Did Wyvern just call us fashion medics?"

 

Kikuyu cracked her knuckles meaningfully. "I agree. We'll kill him later."

 

Degorram scratched her head. "But for now we have to find Orlan's rooms and defend her wardrobe, or something to that effect. What's an Armani shirt?"

 

Kikuyu shrugged and swung her katana back onto her shoulders, wincing as she touched a bruise on her jaw. "I don't know. But I guess we're about to find out. You have a hard head."

 

Degorram poked an egg swiftly beginning to form on her cranium and grimaced. "You have a hard jaw. Lets get moving."

 

Kikuyu and Degorram strolled easily down through the Pen Complex hallways, knocking on doors and asking for directions to Orlan's rooms. With every inquiry there was a pointing towards the east ward; as "high as you could go" were the directions from one rather blue, irritated looking artist, who was, by the way, covered in paint.

 

Kikuyu twitched as the door was slammed in their faces. "I suppose she likes to see the sun, but only at certain hours. It might fade her 'ultra expensive Armani leather covered couches," she growled. "Come on, let's get an elevator."

 

At the top floor the elevator opened to a single foot long stretch of carpet and then there was a door. Apparently Orlan's rooms were a little larger than they had first thought. They had been told that Orlan's rooms were in the east wing. They hadn't been told that Orlan's rooms were the east wing!

 

Tentatively Kikuyu raised a hand to knock on the door, stained glass window compound. Degorram braced herself, glaring at the door. "If anyone starts lecturing me on fashion sense I'll just knock them on the head."

 

Kikuyu crossed her arms, eyeing the door stiffly. The feel of the katana against her back was reassuring, if nothing else was. If something went amiss and they had to break for it this was the only door out, unless there were others scattered across the rooms within. She doubted it. And there weren't likely to be too many windows this high up.

 

They heard hurried footsteps coming towards the door. Both girls, shinobi and shape-shifter, braced themselves for the worst of fashion exuberance as the door began to open...

Edited December 17, 2006 by Kikuyu Black Paws

[Mynx]

Draaaaaaaaag*thud*draaaaaaaaag*thud*...

 

Mynx's head bumped against the uneven ground, each thud bringing her reluctantly back into consciousness.

Groaning, she opened her eyes, forgetting for a moment that she was blind and wondering why she couldn't see anything. Sighing softly as memories returned, the feline pricked her ears and sniffed the air, trying to figure out what the hell was happening and who was dragging her. Picking up the familiar scent of Wyvern, Mynx cleared her throat and spoke up.

 

"Wyvern, what the frag are you doing?"

"Bwah!" Wyvern let go of Mynx's tail and leapt away, arms raised in defence. Peering out from between his claws, the Almost Dragon let out a small sigh of relief when it seemed that Mynx was more interested in standing up and dusting herself off, muttering a small healing charm under her breath to heal the minor injuries she had incurred during her...trip.

 

Feeling a little more herself, Mynx recast her magesight and turned to face Wyvern.

"So, what were you doing?"

Swallowing nervously, Wyvern began to stammer through the explanation he had given Degorram and Kikuyu. Mynx massaged her temple with a paw as she tried to make sense of the ramble, before enough of it broke through the slight headache to make sense.

"Right," she interrupted Wyven. "Find Cerulean. Got it." Giving her head a final shake to clear it, Mynx nudged Wyvern to get him moving. "Lead on, McDuff," she muttered, partly to herself.

 

Glancing behind at Mynx to make sure she wasn't holding anything weaponlike, Wyvern coughed to himself and began to lead the way. "Sssssorry," he eventually muttered. Mynx just sighed and shook her head, beginning to wonder why she'd even gotten up this morning.

[Cerulean]

Battling valiantly, Helga was on to the dropping Ninjas like Wyvern on a misplaced geld pouch. She wasn't exactly able to leap on them mind you, but by retracting her head fully into her shell and then powering it out to full stretch, she was managing to hurl Cerulean's reagents at the marauding intruders from a little cache she'd assembled within her carapace. 'Take that you buggers!' she cried when a lump of black ash spattered over several Ninjas as they were flipping towards her. The Ninjas, blinded temprarily stumbled round knocking into each other while Helga raced up slowly and bashed them with the lip of her shell. CRACK!

 

A similar fate lay in store for the other unwelcome guests, one was kyboshed by pellets of arrowroot and flailed uselessly to earth. CRACK! Another - having been strafed similarly, grasped hold of a hurtling toadstool stem and upended it to feather-fall gracefully back down - for all the world like a spandex-clad Mary Poppins. Sadly, said Ninja landed in Helga's saucer of stems and was impaled on a daisy stalk. SNAP!

 

Helga breathed out a slow steady breath and wandered round the chamber, collecting her thoughts from where she'd dispersed them earlier. Something niggled the back of her mind like a lock that was clammering to be picked. 'Well the less I think about it, the quicker it'll come' mused the tortoise, stacking up an assortment of feather fronds and fern in the alphabetised reagent cupboard. She gathered what was left of the ash and slid it into a small pouch before returning that to its home. 'Cerulean doesn't often play with majicks nowadays, these here look like some powerful ingredients too.' The little tortoise scanned the floor and took in the spell-book's pages fluttering back and forth from the skylight air currents. She let her eyes slide over the other spilled and trodden items. Some violet drops of Hope-Flower juice were beginning to skin over in the corner, next to them sat a mound of loss-bark. The nobbled surface of the bark shavings had snagged a wriggling patch of spandex and Helga went to deal with it before its windmilling limbs came unpinned. 'Loss bark, Hope-Flower juice? She'd only use them for casting 'Wish' Helga murmured. Her eyes shot up to the likenesses of her felines which Cerulean had commisssioned after they'd slipped away from this world. 'She wasn't trying....?' Helga shook her head and wondered about Cerulean's wisdom in trying to draw back ghosts. 'But there isn't any seed hull, she'd need that to cup the Hope-Flower juice while the chant was laid.' Helga hurtled up to the flapping tome and saw the pages flick from the bookmarked page 'Wish' to 'Summon Sprites' to 'Wish' to 'Summon Sprites' 'Oh dear' said the tortoise sucking in air. 'It looks like you should be careful what you wish for.'

[Cerulean]

Cerulean had wandered far and back since the casting of her spell apparently failed. The path from the keep had led her towards the trees where Cyril and she would talk some evenings. She'd walked further still, to the circle of rocks where Wyvie had first showed her how to juggle coins. She laughed at the memory and furrowed her brow slightly as she recalled how the ones she dropped never seemed to make it back to her hands. Oh for simple days again. The blue mage walked on ignoring the thorny ground beneath her bare feet. She remembered studying the ways of Blue majick - and losing her thoughts to a cloud. She'd never been the most attentive Phantasm mage, but as far as she could see the basic Wish spell had been imaginatively combined with her cats' favourite items. DD's best pencil had gone into the mix as well as Moppy's sunspots. True the pages of the spell-book had been fluttering about, and thinking back she couldn't actually remember having used fern or fronds for any rectification of loss majick before. In fact she recalled using them only for...

 

Cerulean's legs buckled and she sat down quickly. 'What have I done?

[Scarlett O'Harpy]

Scarlett's humours were never modest. Right now if she could lay her hands on whoever or whatever had sealed her smacker shut, she'd rip them limb-from-limb then roast them slowly on a maple spit before gnawing the charred flesh from their bones with relish. Scarlett tried to lick her lips, but only managed to tickle her teeth which were deliciously pointy and ready. She took out her compact and grimaced at the dishevelled image. Trying to smooth her hair and wrinkles, she started as footsteps drew close. 'You're not catching me out twice' she thought, scowling at the memory of how she'd been silenced. Scarlett drew herself back into the shadows, and when Mardrax passed her, she decided to follow from a safe distance.

[Quincunx]

Rydia had been following a series of thuds, but they had faded out; instead she came across a very heavy-handed attempt to sweep out clawed footprints. The claws weren't unique, but the clumsy cover-up screamed Wyvern. She held a glowing shiny close to the ground, determined the proper direction, and hurried after him with the limp ninja-suit arms flapping over her arm. Down a nearby corridor, ninjas suspended themselves from the ceiling, each with a fake gorilla foot attached to a stick, and added some more tracks for zest.

 

*****

 

Tzimfemme lolled on a couch in Orlan's antechamber, opposite Rapier who was not lolling. While Orlan's mere presence in the next room had molded both of them to nearly identical nekkid glory, Tzimfemme was an independent mage whereas Rapier was Orlan's subordinate. Her wings would also have interfered with any lolling of the sort the naked mage was presently doing--ankles crossed on the headrest, torso sprawled out along two cushions, head flopped over the edge of the couch, one arm and a few of the thinner braids dangling down to the floor. Tzimfemme's other hand gestured while she spoke, short explosive motions:

 

"Three years in advance I had to schedule this appointment, and still Orlan runs overtime--"

 

"The appointments are being booked five years in advance," countered the fallen dominion. She traced one perfect fingernail along the palm of her hand. "Orlan did you a favor."

 

"Against your advice, right? And quit fingerspelling, I know what Corruption does, and I know that Orlan already knows I'm out here." The identical sensations in Orlan's palm faded away when Rapier spread her hands. "These blocks get thrown in our way so I stay appreciative--" She broke off and her eyes moved towards the doorway. "--and whoever's out there is another one. Hercules' dinner!" Tzimfemme swore, kicking herself upright and sliding towards a harder-muscled mien, then striding to the door and yanking it open.

 

Two by two, the naked women stared at the girls. Tzimfemme leveled with Degorram, and came to half a truce when each noticed the inconstant flesh around the other's eyes. Kikuyu watched Rapier's fingers alight on one another, drew the right conclusion for the wrong reason, and took her eyes off of Orlan's lieutenant. Instead, she started to talk to the shorter one in front:

 

"Wyvern sent us here. . ."

 

Tzimfemme's expression slipped a notch off of neutral.

 

". . .to defend your clothes. . ."

 

Another slip, in the same direction.

 

". . .Orlan."

 

The gears in her jaw gave way. Tzimfemme gaped at them while her eyes lit up and her hand folded up into a pointing index finger, jabbing at the air, desperately seeking a spot to stand on. Rapier slipped into the breach with only the notification of one black feather sliding across another. "The Sexy Sexy Man's time is booked five years in advance," she advised. Her fingertips ceased dancing and her wrists curled her hands outwards, indicating the naked mage. "This is his current appointment."

Edited December 20, 2006 by Quincunx