Jump to content
The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

Carnival Contest Judging Contest


Wyvern

Recommended Posts

Wyvern fumbles through the littered mess of sheep, pillows, and meteorite fragments that currently span the Conservatory floor, limping across the debris while the mysterious black asp continues clinging to his left leg. The lizard comes to a halt as he nears the remains of his Smoke Cloud Sky Lift, and pulls out a large folded pyramid chart from under his arm. The asp hisses as Wyvern fiddles with the diagram until it's stretched to its full size. The reptilian Elder places the chart between a group of not-so-sturdy pillows to the rear of his booth, then sets a small counter of Almost Dragonic Brand Combustible Blow-Up Pops™ at the front and takes a stand on top of the cloud bronco wreckage. The lizard grins and waves a claw at passers-by, then wacks at a sealed sign with his tail. A parchment promptly unravels adjacent to the lollipop table.

 

---

 

E-Z GELD E-Z GELD E-Z GELD

 

Wyvern presents...

The Carnival Contest Judging Contest Scam Event!

Judge Contests about Contests that concern Contests!

Big Geld ... Positions of Power ... Complimentary Explosives (and/or Sweets)

ALL IN ONE BOOTH!

 

E-Z GELD E-Z GELD E-Z GELD

 

---

 

Wyvern cackles and rubs his claws together, ignoring the tightening grip of the asp as he raises a hollow bronco horn and begins speaking through it.

 

"Come one, come all, to the greatest contest in the history of contests judging contests!" Wyvern raises an Almost Dragonic Brand Combustible Blow-Up Pop™ with a lit fuse and tosses it into the air like a firecracker. "I will be judging for the 'Contest with the Largest Number of Ducks.' Please feel free to host your contest in this booth area, and make sssure it concerns other contestsss hosted here. The prize for winning will be a dissscarded candy wrapper, chewed on by yoursss truly."

 

Wyvern strikes a toothy grin, then cries out as the Blow-Up Pop that he tossed lands back on his horns before exploding.

 

;-)

 

OOC: Feel free to start your own contest about contests within this thread, keeping in mind that the base of your contest should be something comic and trivial (ex: a contest for "The Contest with the Funkiest Hats," as opposed to one for "The Best Contest"). People hosting contests can provide prizes as they see fit, though prizes are not necessary by any means. Once the close of this thread is announced, people will announce the winners of their respective comic contests, and will be awarded 50 earned geld via Carnival Clause #3. Responses must be roleplayed. Have fun, all!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

OOC: How easy is it, really, to have read everything in all of the booths during the carnival? As hilarious as it is that you've managed to find a "loophole" (and I laughed for some time), I've thought about it and come to the conclusion that I don't even mind that loophole being exploited. I'm sure there's a few people around here who could judge between the booths, and they probably all deserve 50 geld. (Not that I would know whether or not they had, personally, since I certainly haven't managed the feat myself)...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"Remember, the only contests that can be judged are contesssts hosted within this booth, and all contesssts hosted here must be comical!" Wyvern shouts through his makeshift megaphone, two tones too loud, not noticing Katzaniel as her hair is blown back in a wave of Wyvie breath. "Come on up, don't be shy! Take a Blow-Up Pop - they're nitroglycericious!™"

 

Wyvern pauses and straightens his back as he notices Katzaniel next to his stand, a clothespin on her nose and light traces of ash visible on her fur. The overgrown lizard sets his hollow bronco horn down with an apologetic smirk, then hops off of his platform to examine Katzaniel more closely.

 

"Glad to sssee you could make it, Katz!" Wyvern stares to the left and the right of Katzaniel, then jots down a couple of notes. "And great newsss on not minding the exploitation. I'm sure that, with a 'lil effort on my part, there'll be plenty more barely legal activities where that came from!"

 

Wyvern breaks out into a gaudy laugh that makes Katzaniel's tail go limp. The overgrown lizard examines Katz's hair for a moment and scribbles a few more notes with a nod.

 

"I hope there'sss a contest for 'Contest with the most Almost Dragonic Brand Advertising,' that one'd be in the bag..."

 

"Uhhh, Wyvern?" Katzaniel keeps her voice flat as Wyvern lifts her tail in search of something. She grits her teeth as he jots down more notes. "What are you doing, exactly?"

 

"Oh, nothing." Wyvern twists his snout and frowns as he reads back over his notes. "Hmmm, not a malard in sight. What wasss the name of your contest again?"

 

;-)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

As Wyvern shifted through his notes...he hadn't noticed as the ground below him started to shake in very small bursts. Little did he know...an old...we'll now 17 year old girl was approaching from just over the horizon and before you could say, "Yippy skippy lippy, looooooooooooooo!", the almost dragon was mega tackled from the side and sent flying back first into the littered ground below. A high pitched voice came from a very close...well...right next to his ear...distance...forcing the almost dragon to drop his notes and attened to more...painful matters!

 

Anna-"BOSS! BOSS! Your still as skillful and wonderful and brave and rich! Can I have some geld? I ran out..."

Edited by Black9
Link to comment
Share on other sites

OOC: Uh.. Wyvern... the character Katzaniel is still away on that old AVV mission, and not exactly as you remember her.... I'd appreciate it if no one uses her until she returns. Anyway, sorry for the misunderstanding. I guess I'll just have to go back to finding it amusing.

PS. I'm sorry if this sounds terse. I just can't think of any way to answer this IC, so I'm resorting to OOC for now. I'll let you get back to your extortions...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

"G-g-geld?" Wyvern plugs his bleeding snout with the edge of a claw as he skims over the curves that have developed in Anna's period of absence. The overgrown lizard struggles in his pinned position below the defunct bronco's anus as Anna continues to squeeze. "Y-you're asssking me fer-?"

 

"Pleeeeeaaaaaaase?" Anna wiggles against him in a manner that many non-almost dragonic pennites might have considered innocent. "Just a few geld to start with?"

 

"Well, I, errrr..." Wyvern lets his wings flap once, then snaps to his senses and sits up straight. "Of courssse not!"

 

Anna pouts and lifts herself back to her feet. A few stray pillow feathers fall from her outfit.

 

"Why noooooot?"

 

"It'sss part of your tutelage." Wyvern grumbles as he lifts himself to his feet, wiping a piece of stray meteorite from his tail. "A true patron of parties must be able to manage on a broke budget at all times. So spoketh the kegger in the Book of Morning After. Amental."

 

Wyvern rubs his stinger in the ground as he continues to watch Anna pout and kick up feathers. The lizard taps his foot and raises a claw to his chin, then lets out a sinister hiss and slithers back towards his tardy apprentice.

 

"Of course, you could make a quick bundle right here and now." Wyvern nudges Anna with a shoulder, then raises a claw and whispers. "Just set up your own contest right here, perhapssss something that judges for the Most Party-Oriented Contest? The geld'll start pouring in."

 

Wyvern winks, then hands Anna an Almost Dragonic Brand Combustible Blow-Up Pop™ before climbing back onto his deceased bronco platform. The reptilian Elder coughs up a bit of ash as he raises the hollow bronco horn back to his mouth.

 

"Sssssstep right up, easiest 50 you'll ever make!"

 

;-)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Anna, "Borrows", a few bottles Bruteweiser from Wyvern as she slips away with a quick slight of hand. The teen grins as she starts talking to a nearby good patron that wanted to do the right thing and help out.

 

Anna-"Hey, friend! You want to help out even more?" Anna said with a real charming look in her eye. The man before her couldn't see through her ruthlessness as he sincerely replied,

 

Patron-"Helping the planet and the needy is my game...what can I do to further our cause?" Anna saw the hopeful glee in his eyes and snickered in the back of her mind. Giving the sad eye once again she stated,

 

Anna-"I really want to help you in your quest but I just need a few pieces of geld to fund a charity function. Ninty percent of the proceeds will go to me...I mean...to save the whales! You want to save the poor whales right?" Anna pouts with a pitiful show of shame. The patron couldnt't help but go along with the Slayer as she was on the road to do the right thing...pfffftttt...ya right...and the patron spoke in a happy gitty voice.

 

Patron-"Ofcourse I'll loan you some geld, but you have to pay it back, you will right?"

Anna-"Huh? Pay back? Oh, ya, of course I will...(not)", Anna muttered below her breath.

Patron-"What was that? I thought I just heard you say...oh what the heck...I trust your face!" The sucker handed over 50 geld. Anna, "Borrowed" it with glee and vanished in an instant. She was gone for roughly a half an hour and returned with a wagon full of booze. That's right...a wagon...she was too cheap to rent anything faster! The Slayer looked to be a little tipsy...ok...a lot tipsy...as she fell off the wagon and hit the ground with a hard thud! Stumbling over to a large table, Anna somehow managed to get the Patron to help her, not that she was drunk or anything, to help her transfer the booze over to the table without spilling it. After all...that would be a waste of good booze! Stepping up on a nearby stage, which the Patron so nicely helped to build...the whales needed to be saved by someone...right...Anna found her balance and started to speak.

 

Anna-"Greetings ladies and gents and welcome to todays contest! Most of the proceeds will be going to me! I mean to save the poor whales! Let me ask you something. When you enter a bar...not that I have...it would be illegal...but how do you know the the party really get's started?" Anna takes out a bottle of Bruteweiser and takes a drink...then quickly hides it again. "The Party truly starts, so I hear, when your drunk right? Hello, I am Anna and I will be your judge on the all mage'in drink off! You think you have what it takes to be the drunkest? Can you hold your liquor better then your fellow mage? Then Prove it!" Anna motions her hands toward Wyvern and then notices she made a mistake and instead remotions toward the chairs around the table filled with booze. "Take a seat and drink up...the winner gets the remaining percentage of the proceeds! Drink up everyone!" Anna then falls off the stage rather clumbsily...

 

Anna-"OUCH!"

Edited by Black9
Link to comment
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...