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The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

In need of aceptance


Guest Jess

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Ummm... I am a 17 year old girl in need of someone to talk to about my poetry. Most of it is too depressing for my friends because I write it as an outlet for the things I cannot talk about. I'm not the greatest writer in the world (or even the city), but I'm trying, and isn't that what counts most? The thought? Also, a note, my poems almost never have titles.

 

This is by no means my best, but here goes...

 

I look in the mirror every morning,

But I don't see anything worth while.

All I can see is what's wrong;

I see only what they tell me too.

I'll spend my life wishing,

For something that will never be,

And the entire time I'll wonder "Why not me?"

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Melba barely restrains the urge to hug the waif to her overflowing maternal bosom.

 

Instead she presses home-made chicken soup and freshly baked bagels on Jess.

 

"I may only almost be a Secretary, but I think your poem is lovely," She says stoutly. "You just wander around listen to the others for a while. HE," Here she sniffs loudly, "was out leading a group of the Pen members on a run recently."

 

"If you happen to see that lovely Brute out there, let him know I have fresh squeezed orange juice for him!"

 

She bats her eyes dreamily, then pads back to her desk and lowers herself with a grunt.

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As the figure seated in the swively office chair at Wyvern's desk turns to face Jess and Melba, the nervous applicant crosses her fingers and bites her lip... silently praying for a positive verdict. Both Jess and Melba are shocked, however, when they find that the figure seated at the chair is not actually the Elder of Initiates, but rather Valdar disguised in a fancy sombrero, a thick brown moustach, and a pair of neon orange ear muffs...

 

"Welco-" manages the disguised Valdar before being savagely bashed over the head by a furious, broom-weilding Melba.

 

"Where's the overgrown lizard this time?!" cries Melba furiously, raising her broom again and preparing another strike. She then points with her free hand to Jess and exclaims "This poor applicant has been waiting forever to hear if she's been accepted or not! I refuse to see her wait any longer!"

 

Valdar rubs his throbbing head and mutters "Please madame... be calm. I come only as an extra source of help and guidance for our new applicant..."

 

Val then turns his aching head from the enraged Melba and smiles over towards Jess.

 

"The Pen has taken heed to your poetry and prose Jess... we'd like to help solve your problems of the heart as best we can..."

 

"Oh...?" mutters Jess glumly, already seeing where this might be headed...

 

Valdar quickly takes out a large telephone and sets it on the desk. He then smiles and kindly says "That's why we offer you the best loveline the Pen has to offer..." With that, he suddenly jumps up onto the desk top and takes out a pair of maracas and begins playing 'La Cucuracha' while dancing "... 1-900-333-LOVEFRAUD! Only 10 geld every 30 seconds (plus tax)!"

 

"Uninterested." mutters Jess calmly, turning her back on the feeble attempt at advertising...

 

Melba, however, reacts differently...

 

"Ooooooohhhhh!!! Really?!" cries Melba passionatly, running up to the phone on the desk and dialing the number rapidly "Maybe my dating problems will finally be solved! And Brute will love and worship me forever!" Valdar slaps a hand on his forehead as Wyv's "brilliant scheme" collapses before his very eyes... How did he always end up getting involved in these mess' anyway...?

 

...

 

In a small aclove underneath the floor of the office, Wyvern snickers evilly to himself as he holds a small portable phone to his ear. This scheme would work for sure... there was no doubt about it! The applicant had no idea that the supposed 'loveline' was actually just Wyvern talking through a portable phone. Grinning to himself, the overgrown lizard decides that the first thing he'll do is put the caller on hold for two hours...

 

Finally, the portable phone rings and Wyvern gleefully answers it. His corrupt joy is quickly dissipated, however, when he hears the voice of Melba burst passionatly through the other end:

 

"Oh operater!!!" exclaims Melba on the verge of tears "You have no idea how good it is just to tell someone all about my problems with men!!!"

 

No sooner does Wyvern here Melba's voice combined with the phrase "problems with men" then he immediatly hangs up the phone and franticaly rushes out of his hiding place. Passing Jess on the way out, he hands her an application form stamped 'ACCEPTED' and winks.

 

"I don't believe it!" growls Melba, angrily slamming down the reciever of the phone "The operater hung up on me!"

 

 

 

OOC: An ACCEPTED application, Jess. I look forward to reading more of your poetry and comments on the Pen site, and welcome you as a member. Please provide your e-mail here or send me an e-mail at elitwack90@hotmail.com so I can send you passwords and such. Once again, welcome!

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