Falcon2001 Posted November 7, 2008 Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 (Feedback criticality level 4-5) WARNING: I may post this story later. I'm discussing major plot elements and this will probably spoil it for you. Be warned. I normally write off the cuff and just let it work out. However, this story is different - I've actually taken time to brainstorm a lot on this topic and would like some feedback while I begin writing. What will follow here is a dump of my brainstorming document, followed by explanation. Feel free to pick any part of it to discuss. BEGIN DUMP Metal: Names: Ore: Adamant Probably going with this - Cobalt is real and too close to WoW. On the other hand, it's an old synonym for diamond. Diamonds are shiny? Cobalt Gemaedine Colloquiolisms: Cursesteel Blacksteel Latin roots: Mors Mortis Umbra Acerbus Atrer Atrum Caliga Caligo Properties: Initial reaction to ungloved touch death by madness Gradually moves from frenzied screaming to insidious whispering Bonds to user (?) Not sure about this, might change it Drives user to kill others and himself Landing site slowly polluting the ground around it Cannot store too much of it locally, too dangerous Raids to get new ore Knighthood up against a mountain where they mine iron and smelt it. Blacksmiths common among the Knighthood. Plot ideas: Knighthood attacked, ousted? Two or three books - Rise of the Cursesteel Rule of the Cursesteel Ruin of the Cursesteel Anglo-Saxon basis for characters Firstname, Honorary Name, Home Name Antagonists Leader: Gram, the Exile Generals: Ex-Knights Rank and File: Maddened beasts Protagonists Main Character Names: Oeric If I go Anglo-saxon for the theme of the knighthood, this'll fit well. Resources http://www.mybirthcare.com/favorites/pg1/A...Saxon-names.asp http://home.comcast.net/~modean52/oeme_dictionaries.htm http://books.google.com/books?id=bfBEAAAAMAAJ http://www.nationmaster.com/encyclopedia/G...f-swordsmanship OUTLINE POSTED IN CODEBOX TO PRESERVE OUTLINE FORMAT. Outline: Part 11. Introduction a. Characters i. Oeric 1. Description a. Brown hair b. Blue eyes c. Well-built 2. Traits a. Ponderous b. Self-focused c. Driven d. Withdrawn e. Slow to anger 3. Position a. Initiate ii. Cedric 1. Description a. Brown hair b. Brown eyes c. Lean 2. Traits a. Lazy b. Hot-headed c. b. Setting i. Knighthood 1. Name a. Wacian Knighthood b. Wacia Castle 2. Ranks a. Initiate 1. Recruited at age 14, four years of training 2. Referred to by name - "Firstling, Second-year, third-year, fourth-year" 3. Move to Sergeant on 18th birthday when they get their weapon. b. Sergeant 1. Make move to Knighthood when they receive their given name. 2. Knighting is based on sponsorship by a Knight or higher. c. Knight d. General e. Marshal (Ungloved) 3. Numbers a. Initiates - twice the number of sergeants (160) 1. Approx. ratios: a. First year: 40% (64) b. Second year: 30% (48 c. Third year: 20% (32) d. Fourth year: 10% (16) b. Sergeants - twice the number of knights (80) c. Knights - five times the number of generals (40) d. Generals - twice the number of marshals ( e. Marshals - Four Important Scenes: Recovery of the ore Tale of the Exile Forging of the sword Arrival of the Messenger Arrival of the Exile End Dump More to follow in posts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Falcon2001 Posted November 7, 2008 Author Report Share Posted November 7, 2008 (edited) Explanation of the storyline. The origin of the ore One day, a meteorite lands in a mountain range. The meteorite taints ore veins, turning them into an ore that causes abnormal reactions in sentient creatures. Best described as a malevolent, sentient will in the metal itself. Physical closeness heightens the effect, from a buzzing feeling to a deep-rooting primal fear, to a cacophony of voices filling your mind, each of them commanding you to end your own life. Physical contact is generally fatal. The ore, if forged, is extremely resilient, holds an extremely sharp edge, and is a first-rate metalworking ore. The first person to find this was Gram. Origin of the antagonist Gram was a murderer and exile, who was wandering the mountain range and was the first to discover the ore. Gram is characterized by a singular force of will, and was so able to resist the murderous intent of the metal. Realizing the potential of the ore, he used the terrifying quality of the material to torture a smith into teaching him how to forge, and then he spent years forging himself a weapon and armor. Upon completing his armor, he began marching towards the capital of Wacia, located nearby. The first strike By using the maddening force of his equipment, he was able to recruit a terrified army and lay siege to the capital city. Only the walls prevented him from utilizing his equipment to conquer, so he forced his slaves to make rudimentary siege weapons. However, his siege failed miserably - the lack of training proved to be too great. Unable to defeat him in hand-to-hand combat, the army forced him to flee to the east, pursued by archers and spearmen. He became mostly forgotten over time, and the meteorite was left as a cursed site that nobody went to. I'll finish this post in a few hours Edited November 7, 2008 by Falcon2001 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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