Reservoir Mynx

[Mynx]

...After the Slam Quest...

 

Cryptomancer sat, in raven form, on a table in the shadows of the Cabaret Room, sleepy from the after effects of the caffeine rush he had been on during the Slam Quest.

He was vaguely aware of Mynx finishing with the task of cleaning up before she picked up a duffel bag and disappeared into a room to change. He let his thoughts drift, not really paying attention, until the tinkling of a bell made the RuneMage aware that Mynx was standing in front of him.

"Hey, how's it..." he looked up, his voice trailing away as the weary bird tried to comprehend what he saw. Instead of her standard death robe, Mynx was wearing a black suit with a fitted white shirt, black tie, and what looked to be a gun holster. The raven couldn't help but feel a strong sense of parody occurring, but was unable to identify it.

Searching for words, Cryptomancer finally found the right one:

"Um...?"

Mynx smiled evilly, before a swarm of kitten minions swept over her avian friend.

 

Before he knew what had happened, Cryptomancer found himself duct taped to the chair, not a kitten minion in sight, while Mynx set up a radio on a nearby table.

Returning to her friend, Mynx removed the jacket and rolled up her shirt sleeves, the gun holster now clearly visible. Bending down to be at eye level with the raven, Mynx shook her head once to make the earring tinkle, before grinning maliciously as she began to speak...

 

"Listen bird, I'm not gonna lie to you, all right? I don't give a damn why you pierced my ear, but I'm gonna torture you anyway, regardless. Not to get information. It's amusing, to me, to torture a friend. You can say anything you want cause I've heard it all before. All you can do is pray for this to be quick, which it ain't gonna be."

 

Grinning wider, Mynx duct taped the raven's beak shut, before picking up a large pair of silver tweezers and wandering over to the radio.

"You ever listen to K-Billy's "Super Sounds of the Seventies" weekend? It's my personal favorite. "

 

Fiddling with the tuner, Mynx finally found the channel she was looking for, just as a song was about to begin. Recognising the tune, Mynx purred happily and began to dance along as Stealer's Wheel began to play 'Stuck in the Middle with You'.

 

Grooving along to the tune, bell chiming perfectly in time, Mynx began twisting around Cryptomancer's chair, the RuneMage only able to watch nervously. Suddenly, Mynx bent closer and, in time with the music, began to randomly pluck feathers from the raven's head.

 

After a few dozen plucks, she stopped, no noticeable difference to the raven's form except for slightly ruffled feathers and a pained look in his eyes. Still singing to the song, Mynx disappeared into a back room, coming back moments later with a gas can.

Continuing her dance about the bird, Mynx began spilling the contents of the can - treacle - all over the bird, who was making strangled noises beneath the duct tape gag.

 

Finally stopping as the song ended, Mynx tilted her head at Cryptomancer and grinned.

"Since this isn't gas, and since I'm not sadistic, I'm going to end this parody here. Now. Have we learnt our lesson?"

Reaching down, Mynx pulled off the gag and waited to see if her sticky friend would reply.

 

 

 

[OOC: The parody was from Quentin Tarantino's film Reservoir Dogs. I was just a lot nicer than Mr. Blonde. ]