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The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

Pillow's Application


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*Pillow trots into the recruiting office and sees the quill and partchment on the desk below a sign that says 'applications'. 'A quill,' Pilocanci the Unholy huffs,' how primative!' Reaching into the folds of his skin, he retrieves a small laptop and mini printer. Turning them on, Pilocanci begins to write.*

 

 

The Tale of a Dictator

 

By: Pilocanci the Unholy (A.K.A: Pillow)

 

I was born in a small hamlet near the Wrinklestan/New Fleasian border. I can't remember the name of the hamlet; I had it razed and burned for not paying taxes, I think. I grew up learning magic, politics, and strong arm military force. I briefly entered military service as a glider pilot during the Canidain War, serving in the reserves. After the war, I went into politics; eventually becoming Prefect of a large territory in the southern region of Wrinklestan.

 

After fixing the election for presidente, I had finally assended to the highest position in Wrinklestan. I ruled with a somewhat deceitful hand, I'll admit, but it was for the good of the people. I could have been a 'dog of the people', only they don't bribe nearly as well as the elite corperations and international kibble syndicates. Then, I found out some interesting news. New Fleasian had a new fuel technology that just begged to be taken. So, with little provication, I began massing my armies at the New Fleasian border.

 

Even though I was a virtual dictator, I kept up the charade of democracy my nation had before I took office. Therefore, I had to lobby the U.C.N. (United Canine Nations) for approval for an invasion. That being the case, I had my intelligence network fake reports of MWD (Weapons of Mass Disfuntion) to submit to the U.C.N. It met with much resistance in the U.N.C. Many nations vetoed the war. With that, I invaded New Fleasian.

 

It wasn't a pretty picture. Snubbing the entire world probibily wasn't my brightest idea ever. I managed to take over New Fleasian and steal their fuel technology, but was attacked by a coalition of U.C.N forces. Forced to step down as Presidente, I turned my political cabinet into fleas (I can only do that to a handful of people at once) and went into exile; one day hoping to return to power...

 

The End

 

*Pilocanci finishes printing up the document and places it on Wyvern's desk, waiting for the Almost Dragon's reply.*

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  • 2 weeks later...

Pillow sighs and lays back on himself as he swerves in his applicant easychair, his dreams of invading new territories ruined as dark clouds of doubt reign upon him in the lizards absence. He glances at the quill that had been offered for writing his application and rolls his eyes, patting his laptop confidently and glancing towards the position of his application on the Recruiters desktop. The applicant frowns upon noticing that a thick layer of dust now covers his paperwork, and lifts himself from his seat in the hopes of cleaning off the application piece. He doesn't get far, however, as the front doors of the Office suddenly burst open and Wyvern rushes in, dressed in a fine grey suit and tossing Almost Dragonic Brand Propaganda Pamphlets™ into the air. Arriving at Pillow, Wyvern quickly shakes his hand, sticks a "Vote for Almost a Dragon" pin into his fabric, and snatches his application up off of the desktop. The overgrown lizard then parades the application piece in front of a large crowd of Elder Dwarf paparazzi, who swarm into the Office and begin taking several pictures

 

"As you can ssssee" hisses Wyvern confidently. "I, 'The Other Candidate,' am continuing my campaign by responding to this application piece from our dear friend, Pilocanci the- errrrr... the Evangelically Holy!"

 

"What?" mutters Pillow, raising a brow. "But my name is-"

 

"Ssssssshhhhhh!" hisses Wyvern, slapping a claw over the applicants mouth and letting out a nervous laugh. Quickly reading over the application, the lizard grins and tosses it to the side, then places one arm around Pillow and raises the other in the air.

 

"Friends, this is a time of new leadership... a time when the leaders of the Pen will unite with the former presidente of New Fleasian to rid the Pen canines of any annoying pests. May I remind you that my opposition, 'The Candidate,' has no policy in mind for helping wolves throughout the Pen. Thank you, thank you all!"

 

With that, the paparazzi pack up their cameras and depart from the Office, causing Wyvern to immediately let go of the dumbfounded Pillow. Looking left and right, the applicant stammers:

 

"What was that?! Why did you call me-"

 

"Not a bad application, Mr. Pilocanci." interrupts Wyvern, sorting through a few pieces of paperwork on his desktop. "Though I would have loved to have learned more about the people of New Fleasian... they're like ghosts caught in the dawn of a new dictatorship."

 

"Oh." mutters Pillow. "Well, you see, they-"

 

"I do really like how the piece reflects current events, though." hisses Wyvern, grinning. "Virtual dictators, Canidain Wars, Weapons of Mass Disfunction, the U.N.C..."

 

Pillow smiles victoriously.

 

"... it all reflects that recent commercial I made for Almost Dragonic Brand Cheap Substitute Pen War Games™! Set ups for Canidain Wolf War, Tamaramission Blood War, and Ganaffian Repeated Siege War included! Also comes with the Ultimate Newbie Conversion guide, along with plenty of Weapons of Mass Disfunction. Order it today!"

 

Pillow frowns and stares blankly, raising a hand to speak only to watch as Wyvern quickly stamps his application ACCEPTED and soars out of the room, hurrying back to his electoral campaign.

 

;-)

 

OOC: An ACCEPTED application, Pillow, welcome to the Mighty Pen! :) I look forward to reading more of your works, and hope you enjoy your stay here. ;-) Once again, welcome!

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