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The Pen is Mightier than the Sword

Mr.Bunny's Bachelor Auction date with Alaeha


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Mr.Bunny frowned as he stood in front of Alaeha's door. She had seem forgiving enough in the letter she had sent in response to his letter apologizing about his delay in setting up the date. The thing was, he had stumbled upon a remarkable break through in his arcane art of carrot summoning. It isn't every day that one is actually able to travel to the elemental plane of carrots and make it back alive! Not to mention to be able to bring back samples that remained upon the prime plane! In any case, he had finally finished all his research on his new discovery and here he was, decked out in his finest blue silk cape and black satin eyepatch in front of the door to the woman who had been kind enough to bid upon him at the bachelor auction.

 

He took a deep breath and a step forward then knocked. He found kind of embarassing that he was nervous still, but he tried not to dwell on it. Within a few scant moments, the door opened up. Alaeha, who has prepared for Mr.Bunny's arrival, was already looking down for the rabbit with a friendly smile on her face.

 

"Ah, Mr.Bunny! Just in time!"

 

She was dressed in a light blue dress that was good for travelling, yet still elegant enough for the occasion as well as a lighter blue travelling cloak.

 

"..."

 

"Oh yes, those!" Alaeha ran back into her room for a moment, and returned wearing a set of highly fashionable Mr.Bunny ears. The clever carrot mage had sent along a pair with his original letter to Alaeha. Of course, these were no regular Mr.Bunny ears but in fact Mr.Bunny Translator ears. That way, they could have a normal conversation, as Alaeha was not currently versed in rabbit-speak.

 

"You look lovely this evening." Mr.Bunny said, in an almost matter-of-factly way that was belied by a happy expression.

 

"Thank you! That's a nice cape there, too."

 

"Ah, I'd hoped you'd like it. In any case, shall we depart?"

 

"But of course; lead on, gentle sir!" she said in a slightly humurous tone as she offered her arm to the little carrot mage.

 

Mr.Bunny concentrated for a minute, then muttered a few arcane words. A carrot only slightly larger than Mr.Bunny materialized, hovering, in the air in front of the rabbit. He hopped onto it, willed it up to about Alaeha's shoulders, smiled, and started moving forward.

 

Outside, a very intricate looking carriage made out of carrots drawn by a team of carrot horses was waiting. Mr.Bunny floated forward a bit faster, and willed the door open. He turned and bowed his head slightly, beckoning Alaeha to enter. She looked at the cart auspiciously for a moment, shrugged and climbed in. Mr.Bunny hopped in after her, and closed the door.

 

"Intriguing," she said, "I would have imagined this to smell more like carrots, yet it seems... normal."

 

If one could tell, they would notice Mr.Bunny blushing slightly, "Well, I've been working this for a while now. I guess my practice has paid off... I hope." he laughed nervously.

 

Alaeha laughed lightly in response and patted Mr.Bunny on the head a few times, "It's lovely! So, where are we headed?"

 

"Well, I thought since we both appreciate music in way or another, we could catch a symphony first, then grab a bite to eat at a little bistro I know of on the edge of town."

 

"Sounds great!" So, Mr.Bunny was the old-school romantic type, was he? It seemed like the night not might turn out as exciting as she had hoped after all, but she'd wait and see what the little mage would have up his sleeve.

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  • 2 weeks later...

They rode in uncomfortable silence for a few minutes, neither of them having anything to say right away. Alaeha was about to comment on the intricacies of the enchantments holding the carriage together when they suddenly ground to a halt.

 

"...?"

 

"Yeah, I'm okay. I wonder what happened..?"

 

"..."

 

"Okay, be careful though."

 

Mr.Bunny went to peek through the window on the door, when an axe suddenly barged in through the wall and nearly sliced off all of Mr.B's whiskers.

 

"..."

 

"I think you're right. Are you ready?"

 

"..."

 

"Alright, carefully now..." Alaeha produced a knife out of *somewhere* within her clothing, although Mr.Bunny wasn't quite sure where. The carrot summoner prepared a few quick combat spells while Alaeha begun an enchanting song that would help the reflexes of the two assailees as they sprung out the door. As Alaeha went out, she sent a blast of force to clear the immediate area in front of the door and gripped her knife in a ready position with her other hand. Mr.Bunny leapt out quickly, sending a wave of razor-sharp carrot slices in a wide arc in front of him. The assailant who had tried to burst into the carriage with an axe was neatly sliced in half, although Mr.Bunny noticed something odd; the people attacking them were not people, but actually...

 

"...potatoes?!?!" Alaeha blurted out increduously.

 

A rather gruff-looking potato sporting thick plate mail, a spiked helmet, and a nasty looking spiked club stepped forward (if you could call it stepping) and addressed the pair. "Eh, this is potato territory, mates. Ye shudda known better than te be tresspassing 'round these parts, showing off yer fancy cerrots. Now I'm going to show ye'z all wot a real vegable kin do!" With that, he lunged forward, his club coming down rather quickly towards Alaeha's skull. The seasoned woman was ready to deflect the strike, although she realised it'd be pretty painful, since a knife isn't all that good at deflecting a club. Luckily though, Mr.Bunny was ready and at some point had hopped under the carriage and up onto his date's shoulder. Just before impact, a concentrated beam of carrot shot out from the air in front of Alaeha's face and intercepted the club. The beam continued on forward and knocked the potato half a block down the street. Unfortunately, this only seemed to anger the tough potato, since he climbed up rather easily. "Oh ho ho ho. So we've got a tricky little guy, do we? Aye, I think ye'll make a good addition to our carrot stew! Let's get 'em boys!"

 

Both Mr.Bunny and Alaeha went into defensive positions, spells on the tips of their tongues, waiting for the right moment to strike. It seemed as if they were now surrounded, the carriage at their back...

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  • 3 weeks later...

(ooc: sooooo sorry I'm taking so long :S)

 

Things looked dim at that point in time. More pototoes seemed to be pouring out of every alleyway, building and sewer hole. Being potatoes as they were, they were easy enough to julienne, dice and fry... but every time they took one down, another two replaced the one that fell.

 

"..!" Mr.Bunny finally shouted, angered at all the nonsense. Of course, this was actually a verbal component to a spell. There was a flash of magical light then the sound of wings flapping. The carrot carriage was nowhere in sight. However, where the carriage was, there was a fourty-foot long carrot dragon hovering in the air lazily. All the potatoes paused to examine this horrifying transmutation then rushed Mr.Bunny. The dragon swooped, razor-sharp claws raking deep trenches through the potatoes as his carroty breath weapon sprayed carroty death upon other potatoes. Alaeha looked in astonisment from the pile of dead hashbrowns that currently surrounded her.

 

"..." Mr.Bunny called as he hopped on the dragon and directed it towards Alaeha. She wiped her knife free of potato juice, sheathed it, then hopped aboard.

 

"Wow, thanks for the save, Mr.B... there didn't seem to be an end to those guys."

 

"..." he said, blushing slightly.

 

"No need to be modest, now..."

 

"..."

 

"I guess so." she paused for a moment, "...so, where are we going now?"

 

Mr.Bunny responded in an arcane language and a portal appeared before them. Inside, both Mr.Bunny and Alaeha could see what looked like... carrots. Tons and tons of carrots.

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  • 2 weeks later...

Alaeha stood there blinking for a few moments, unsure of what she saw beyond the portal. "What is that?"

 

"..."

 

"I never even knew there was an elemental plane of carrots... is it safe to enter?"

 

"..."

 

"Are you *sure*? Most elementalists can't safely traverse their planes of specialty... not that I've heard of, anyways."

 

"..."

 

Alaeha looked at the portal, then looked at Mr.Bunny, who seemed to be exhuding confidence like no bunny she had ever seen before then said, "Okay, I'm trusting you!" Mr.Bunny hopped in first, to ensure everything was safe, then Alaeha followed cautiously. Once they stepped completely through and the portal closed behind them, they found the area to be a bit less chaotic than it looked like from the outside. Trying to comprehend the physics of the plane would be a bit difficult, if you examined it, but the level Alaeha and Mr.Bunny were on resembled the Prime Material Plane... if everything were made out of carrots. The ground was carrots, and the sky was carrots. It was uncertain how they were breathing or seeing, because the air was carrots too. Yet, they were able to traverse the plane.

 

After a couple minutes, they came upon what looked like a town. Mr.Bunny hopped on, leading the way, while Annael examined the wonders of the carrot plane. Normally, mundane things like you'd find in a city wouldn't excite her, but seeing them as... carrots... was something else. In her wonder, she didn't notice that Mr.Bunny had stopped until she stepped on his tail, and he jumped about three feet into the air. It was kind of funny, because you don't normally see that kind of expression from a rabbit. Or any expression, for that matter.

 

"Heh... sorry about that." Alaeha managed a meek smile, while Mr.Bunny seemed to frown somewhat.

 

"..."

 

"Oh. Were here? Where's here?"

 

"..."

 

"A restaurant? How quaint..."

 

"..."

 

"Okay!" she smiled, and followed Mr.Bunny in. The restaurant, despite being all carrot-y seemed nice. To her surprise there were scents other than that of carrots. Not to mention, life forms that also were non-carrots. The Maitre'd, a tall, skinny-looking carrot wearing a tuxedo adressed them both.

 

"Good to see you again, Mr.Bunny." his voice was rather carroty, "This must be your date for the evening, then? What lovely young lady." Alaeha was confused, because the carrot didn't seem to have eyes, but she mentally shrugged. "Well, the pleasure is mine, miss..."

 

"...Alaeha." she curtsied and smiled at the carrot.

 

"A pleasure indeed. Well, shall I show you to your table?"

 

 

(OOC: Okay, I have to stop. My brain is resisting me very hard. I'm sorry if it has sucked insofar. SOOOOOOOOOOOOO sorry -.-;)

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