Justin Silverblade

At this point in my life, the logic works like this - given that the previously mentioned answer is unchoosable.

 

If it were me or my child, who would I pick? Kill me.

If my spouse had to choose between her and our child, who would she pick? Kill her, not the child.

If my spouse had to choose between me and our child, who would I want her to pick? Kill me.

 

On this kind of a subject, I would hope I would have a spouce who felt the same way. Thus assumed:

 

If I had to choose between my spouse and my child, who would my spouce want me to pick? Kill her, not the child.

 

So, now we have to consider the child. Assuming away all deseases etc (so as to take the carpet out from under any arguement the child might later make in their future), the child has lived less, and experienced less. My spouse and I, despite problems that rise and ease with time, would have a deeper and more developed sense of self, and if we're with each other and have a child, I'd like to think - a deeper sense of happiness. Knowing it, how could we rob it from a child? Especially if FINDING and REALIZING that happiness, is exponentially better than having it.

 

This is what we... or I suppose I in this situation... would hope to teach our child. No parent should outlive their child, I heard it once said, and, with special exceptions of couse, I agree with it. Hopefully I could teach my child the same.

 

If I had to pick who lives, it would be the child.

 

Though to think of it, I think rationality could help ease a conscience that made either decision.

 

Just had to answer, Sayline! That was morbid however!

 

- Justin

Hello!

 

My appologies for not being around too much - I like what's been going on. While at home for the summer (my last summer at home) my internet access is very very limited. I thought I'd better pop by though and wish you all well.

 

I didn't really expect to depart for so long - which is why there was no departing message. But still, I miss you guys and all the wonderful work that goes on here. I don't think I'll have a lot of time until september, but I'll visit often.

 

Wyv, I thank you for the email - I'll take a look at the thread, and if I have time, I'll do my best at getting in there for a post or two.

 

Anyways, was thinking of you all, and wanted to put my name out there as missin' ya. Hopefully I'll find some time now and then to devote to you all... but to give you an idea of what I'm working with - I have phone modem at my home here... and I'm sharing it with three others...

 

Chat with you all soon! Keep writing!

 

- Justin

"Love" is a word.

 

Nothing exquisitly more, nothing degradingly less. Past that it's all real life, and it (usually) only gets better from there.

 

- Justin

You know I like it Matteo.

 

 

- Justin

OOoooOoOooOOOooo, me too! me too! IwantoneIwantoneIwantone!

 

*cough* *ahem* Uh... I mean.... umm... If it's not too much trouble, a signed copy would be neat.

 

 

Wonderful. I'm glad I read it. Thank you for sharing.

Hey gang, it's been a while since I posted. I was perusing the boards here the other day and this morning, as I usually do and a couple popped out. Coupled with MSN chat, it got the ol' wheels churning. Not a very happy poem, but it was what was catching my eye. Hope you all enjoy! Inspired by the works of Falcon2001 and X-Sabre, and a chat with Gwai Thanks guys!

 

PS - After looking at it, the title really should be "Can" and not "Could." Sorry about that! Politely fixed - P

 

 

Can I Be Right?

 

 

I taste it there – a gaping wound,

The torn tissue tasting pain,

Each scab and bruise a living basis,

For mistaken justice, illusionary gain.

 

Suffering’s bitter: claimed nutrition.

Meal of meat for immoral submission.

 

I see it there – a seeping wound,

Crimson armies of angry form,

Subtle drop in perfect art,

Strokes of brush on paper torn.

 

A colour copy of retribution

A pedestal painting; blind solution

 

I hear it there – a closing wound,

A subtle sound of scare and fear,

Crowds closing sacred sore,

Gates closed and new shell clear.

 

New bricks built on slippery surface,

Broken blood receives new purpose

 

I touch it there – a tender wound.

I want to heal, I want to feel,

To live in love’s sweet content.

To mend their flesh without repeal.

 

Mending matters of complication,

Seems to gouge at skin’s sensation.

 

A gaping wound, a stench of ours

Rotting skin, unrelenting.

 

Our gaping wounds, our healing touch.

Torn in tearing, torn in mending.

Hmm,

 

I'm not sure what to make of the tone of this poem. Sometimes it feels very sad, sometimes very angry, sometimes just hopeless. Neatly done in a short poem. Not even sure I understood it all I'm afraid. Good nonethless, as what I didn't quite catch exactly, the mood made up for.

 

- Justin

This is a great piece. I enjoyed it very much.

 

I'm afraid I don't have much time to comment on it, but I wanted to say that that last verse was simply marvelous. Really put together the rest of teh piece, and captures the underlying essence of the poem, and depending on how it's read, can alter the vision ever so slightly.

 

Great work, thanks!

 

- Justin

Still not to sure if I liked the flow of it or not, but I definately liked what it stood for.

lol - Funny, I enjoyed it for exactly the opposite reason, purpleshadow.

 

Don't get me wrong - I'm the first to dislike someone who says "winning is everything." But, I am a big fan of "It's not who wins or loses, but how you play the game."

 

There's a bit of a difference. Going in with teh thought that "I play to lose, I go in unprepared" seems... well, a not very good way to play. Whether I'm a pro at what I'm doing, or a newbie, I always encourage my opponents to realize that they can very easily win... that one side being really practiced ensures nothing. "Playing to win," doesn't nessesarily mean "not playing for fun." But to go at it with such a negative attitude, feels to me a bit spiteful.

 

"I prefer to lose happy than to win with disgrace"

- Love this line, and completely agree with it.

 

"Life's just a game and you don't need to win

The endings the same either way that you end"

- Again love it, adn completely agree -

 

"I hate to sound cattish, but the loser is you

[Verse break]

I play to lose and show up to the fight"

- See this, combined with that second verse, first line, turns teh whole thing around on me. Just because I prepare, and try to win and have fun, means I'm really not having any fun...? And again, I don't know how much fun it would be to play with someone who just wants to actively sabatoge their own competition. Playing a game or an argument to lose is like playing the piano to make obnoxious noise - no one enjoys.

 

"But I always emerge happier than you"

- Again, makes me a little displeased. As someone who tries to win, I've had many games where my opponent and I (who also tries his damnest to win), have really enjoyed the outcome, no matter who wins. Sounds pretentious.

 

"But I have no trouble sleeping in the dark of the night"

- Hmm, well, again, it kind of goes back to my earlier point. And, to be honest... I kind of suspect a lie from the speaker. I remember once when I told a bully whilst he was walking away, happy with his recent bullying triumph, that what he had done was stupid. He turned right around, puffed out his chest, walked right up to me very angrily and said: "Do you think what you say matters to me? We can go right now if you want."

 

I get kinda the same idea from that line - strikes me as the kind of line someone who had spent a couple nights up late would say.

 

That all said, Falcon - I think it's a wonderful poem for that purpose. Not only did I love all the lines I omitted from quoting (they all flowed neatly, and with wonderful imagry! I LOVED the lyrical knight), but they evoked so much emotion out of me. For a poem about arguing, it certainly made me want to argue it! It does a wonderful job. Thank you very much for posting it. Your work is great, as usual. It was a pleasure.

 

- Justin

 

PS - (sorry couldn't resist) "Choas can easily overcome logic since it has no boundries..." Umm... chaos works outisde of logic's boundries, yes. That doesn't make it an effective arguing tool though. In fact, it makes it obsolete as an arguing tool, since it ignores the purpose and composition of arguements. Try playing chess with no rules whatsoever - it doesn't work.

That'd be me. Did I manage to trespass through your end of the grove?

 

I try to give a little something on my arrows, since my AM skills leave something to be desired.

 

- Justin

Oh sigh...

 

Damn whatever gods let me look at this thread! I'm playing now, and hopefully won't become too hooked. Look me up - Enos.

 

- Justin

Wow....

 

Nyyark, this is a great idea! The poem is really effective... I find myself at a loss for words - I don't really have a critique for you. The 'between the lines' feel was really well done, and was so accurate. A very sad work, but very effective.

 

I can really appreciate it, and I really do like it. Thanks for working on it, and thanks for sharing it.

 

- Justin

LOL

 

These are GREAT! Thanks so much for sharing!

 

- Justin

 

A gal across the hall from me in dorms here has that posted to her door. It's good. *shudder* finals aren't.

 

Good luck on 'em Tralla!

 

*just a few more days, just a few more days, just a few...*

 

- Justin

MMmmm, tasty. I'm sorry I missed it the first time.

 

I'll save the commentary, and the critique. I dont' think it really needs either... but I do want to say that I really liked it.

 

Thank you for sharing, Peredhil. It's always a pleasure. I enjoyed it very much.

 

- Justin

Rev, Ayshela,

 

Thanks. I'm glad you liked it. Very simple, but one of my favorite pieces. Rev, I'd love to tell you, but to be completely honest, I don't know if I could rightly remember...

 

Posted: Feb 28 2002, 01:37 PM

It was a long time ago.

 

- Justin

Wow.... Just searching the old poems and read this one. I don't know if Bhurin still frequents the site, but I thought I'd bumb this one up. A great piece.

 

If you come by here Bhurin, thanks for sharing. Sorry it took me so long to find it!

 

- Justin

Breathtaking.

 

Beautiful.

 

- Justin

 

I completely agree - I've been just there. In fact, I live right there. An absolutely wonderful poem. I loved it.

 

Simple, delicate, beautiful. I've read some dark and dreary poems, some light and magestic ones too. Ones that had "epic" written all over them, and some that were simple one liners. But it's funny how sometimes, when you least expect to be reading it, greatness strikes you right in the face.

 

It's refreshing. I haven't read a poem like this, one that I truly like, for a long time. I mean that too - it's not blowing smoke. It was a real treat, at just the right moment.

 

Thanks!

 

- Justin

[spooky]Bwa ha ha ha![/spooky]

 

Nice pic, Rune.

 

Happy Halloween!

 

- Justin

 

Wow.... A neat poem. Really had bite to it, Ayshela, bite and beauty. I'm glad you shared it. Made of sugar and spice...? Maybe just spice this time, huh?

 

Thanks!

 

- Justin

*warm smile*

 

Beautiful, P. Heartwarming and lovely.

 

Thank you.

 

- Justin

Vlad,

 

I read it.

The poem was good. It was really good.

 

If I could make one reccomendation - a slight editing. I don't know if you meant to leave the "i" uncapitalized, but if you were to capitalize the rest of the lines and leave the "me" and the "i" uncapitalized, it would certainly have a larger impact. But either capitalizing every line or selectively, I would humbly suggest some thought into it either way. That aside, I really liked it. The message was well expressed.

 

As for personal motivations, I'm sorry there was any reason to write this. I *think* I know where you're coming from. That feeling can really be depressing, and lonely - but I'm sure there's many a person who would hear you out, if you want to speak. They're all a PM away.

 

Thanks for sharing though. It was well written, and a powerful message.

 

- Justin/Enos

Sincerely Yours,

 

 

By candlelight, quickly scrawled,

The words themselves trying to leak out of ink and quill as swiftly as elegance will allow, but,

Each

Individual

Word

Is thoughtfully tried.

Every

Single

Phrase

Is carefully contextual.

 

This artist, knowingly naked,

Attempts to clothe the most intimate emotions with his style, penmanship, and wordly grace:

Each

Individual

Opinion

Is skillfully shrouded.

Every

Single

Passion

Is rationally wrapped.

 

The letter, hand crafted,

Lures spirit in the safety of the night, entices it from mind, trapping it on paper.

The final creation,

Heart

And

Soul

Is poetically perfect.