Justin Silverblade Posted April 18, 2002 Report Share Posted April 18, 2002 Not sure of the title, but it's something I just came up with, so I thought I'd share. Enjoy! Singing Silence A silence. The painful thought, Of life slipping away, Without consent, Without hope’s subtle ray, From the deathly box. I can’t bear it, I won’t. The soft movements of time A motion so slow That it can’t be caught Like a dream, I reach out To miss that which I sought A sound. Gentle laughter distantly, Innocent and free, Wistfully wandering, Carried through the air by glee, ‘Round that corner where, I long to be. Turn and walk with open hand, To embrace that music, Like a poison, corrupts it, And sings back to me, That old silent hit. The record plays ‘round and ‘round- I can’t bear the noise, Of singing silence. Edited by: Justin Silverblade at: 4/21/02 1:37:12 pm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wyvern Posted April 19, 2002 Report Share Posted April 19, 2002 Very interesting poem Justin... As I see it, the principle theme of the poem is hinted at through the uses of antithesis through clusters of images, particularly between images such as "hope’s subtle ray" (l. 5) and "deathly box" (l. 6). The most striking of these contrasts, however, is undoubtedly within the title and the last line of the poem, "singing" and "silence". Another thing to note is the many images related to time, and how said time has been lost... Throughout the poem, the narrator seems to be helplessly reaching out towards the things he misses, the places he wants to be, and even hope in general. In my opinion, the "silence" mentioned in the poem could act as a symbol of idleness, suggesting that rather then acting the narrator is wasting his life away in silence. Also evoked from the poem's "silence" is a certain sense of loneliness, which is often combined with lines dealing with love and happiness lost, yet not forgotten. This could be suggesting that the "singing silence", the continuous repitition of "that old silent hit", is largely due to the narrators constantly reminiscing of happier times. Perhaps, then, the ultimate theme of the poem is that the majority of the narrator's time spent reminiscing of happier days might be better spent living in the moment. Very good poem, Justin. I love the idea of silence being a song... [image]http://members.shaw.ca/kea/am/wyvy.jpg[/image] ------------------------------ Almost a Dragon... "My life is one big crime, I try to scheme through it." -Common, "The 6th Sense" Owner of the Decanter of Endless Booze. Edited by: Wyvern00 at: 4/18/02 9:04:22 pm Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justin Silverblade Posted April 19, 2002 Author Report Share Posted April 19, 2002 Thanks Wyv. A good interpretation. It's strange, usually, I'm no good at this sort of thing (the metaphors, the imagery, etc), and I just write the message I want to get across, and then try to work in some good stuff from there. This poem happened the opposite way. I found myself writing before thinking, and then editing with thought. I found that my first statement in this post was false... I am very sure of the title. Perhaps you guys (and everyone's welcome to jump in on this one, though you always are), can give me a hand. You see, I am still uncertain about the last three lines. Particularly, the first line of the last verse there. "To love and lose, and love still..." At first I put it there to help the reader 'interpret' the poem. But now in light of your insights, and re-reading I see that the interpration can be much broader than the restrictions put on by the narrator, should that line stay true. Also, the job of interpreting is well done by the title and/or the last line. But if I am to remove it, or change it (though I don't think I'd change it), I am nost sure if just: I can't bear the noise, Of singing silence. would work. What do you think? Yours, Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cyril Darkcloud Posted April 20, 2002 Report Share Posted April 20, 2002 There is an intriguing sructural dimension to the poem: Stanza 1 * Silence - which is in its own way an absence of movement. No sound vibrates within the air, for example. * Life is portrayed as slipping away rather being expressively lived. Stanza 2 * Time moves past the narrator rather than the narrator moving in time. Stanza 3 * Sound which is a form of movement [see above]. * Life is being expressively lived away from the place of silence. Stanza 4 * There is an imperative to move perceived by the narrator. * This imperative identifies the narrator as one painfully poised between silence and sound, stillness and movement. Final Stanza * It was the expressive living of love [sound] that let to the numbing stillness of loss [silence] and it is difficult to risk sound only to possibly fall back once more into silence. Nice job. Edited by: Cyril Darkcloud at: 4/20/02 9:55:35 am Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Justin Silverblade Posted April 21, 2002 Author Report Share Posted April 21, 2002 Thanks Cyril. Just a note, I've changed the final stanza from: To love and lose, and love still... I can’t bear the noise, Of singing silence. To: The record plays ‘round and ‘round I can’t bear the noise, Of singing silence. I think I like this one. Keeps the idea, without restricting the metaphor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts