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Regel

I believe.

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I believe,

and still it hurts,

to see you in decline.

The struggle for that next breath,

Alive but short on time.

 

I believe,

and so it seems,

your battle is almost done.

The pain now numb with morphine,

the waiting game's begun.

 

I believe,

She'll miss you,

There's been no where to hide.

She fought as hard as you did,

Always at your side.

 

Yes I believe,

We'll find a cure some day.

Perhaps, but even then

I never will get used to

losing a good friend.

Edited by Regel

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I like this Regel. Very good sense of the pain someone endures when they are losing or have lost a friend or family member. That isn't something you could ever get used to.

 

On a lighter note, it makes me want to hug everybody in sight.

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I really like this poem, Regel. The subject matter that you choose to deal with is very mature and heartfelt, and the rhyme scheme doesn't feel forced or stilted. I liked the second and third stanzas the most... the reference to the "waiting game" beginning seemed to enforce the emotions behind the piece, and the comparison of the dying person's battles to the struggles of his loved ones was very good.

 

The last stanza seemed to be a more obvious statement than the rest of the poem, and was less interesting to me for that reason. Also, the introduction of the "Our" in the first stanza was a little jarring to me, and you might consider keeping that stanza in the first person and altering that line somehow.

 

Very well done, once again. :-) I've noticed that in some of your previous poems, the style and form didn't mesh with the content, but here I feel like they go hand in hand and work together well. Good stuff!

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Exceptional! You most definitely have a remarkable way of capturing the reader's attention every time you put fingertip to key!!

 

:wolf:

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